A Female MLB Umpire, Costco Cashes In At The Villages, And A Danish Zoo Wants Your Pets
All the news you need to know from the week that was.
It’s Saturday, and if you spent your week doing all kinds of other stuff instead of paying attention to the news, I’ve got some good news for you: The Punch-Up is here to bail you out.
It was a week, to say the least.
We’ve got a woman about to make history as Major League Baseball’s first female umpire, a Danish Zoo announced that they’re more than happy to take any unwanted pets off your hands, and Costco just made a killing in The Villages…
…a fiscal killing; not a… y’know.
So, let’s dig in because there’s plenty to talk about.
A new report revealed that the Biden Administration considered expelling all Russian NHL players to put pressure on Russian President Vladimir Putin during negotiations for a prisoner swap. Even if they had done that, the Maple Leafs still wouldn’t have had a shot at winning the Stanley Cup.
Saquon Barkley said that he was not aware he had been added to President Trump’s Fitness Council until his name was announced this week. Just think how surprised he’ll be when he finds out he’s also the new US Ambassador to Djibouti.
A new study from the CDC has found that a majority of Americans get more than half their calories from ultra-processed foods. "One half? Amateurs," said Illinois governor JB Pritzker.
Jen Pawol will become the first woman to umpire a regular-season Major League Baseball game this weekend. She is also expected to become the first umpire in history to never lose an argument, regardless of how minor or ridiculous it may be.
A New York college says it will drop the use of the word "field" from its social work curriculum over concerns it could cause trauma to black students by reminding them of slavery. On top of that, they’re also concerned it could remind nerds of high school gym class.
The opening of a new Costco in The Villages, Florida, saw the store make $15 million in a single day. Even crazier: that was just what they made on value packs of Depends.
Los Angeles Angels third baseman Yoan Moncada missed a game this week to take his US citizenship test. Moncada said afterward that, unlike when he signed with the Angels this offseason, it feels good to be joining a winning team.
Reality star Brandi Glanville accidentally burned off part of her face with Nair while trying to take care of a facial parasite. So, be careful the next time you try to clean up that stache, Rashida Tlaib.
A Danish Zoo is asking people to donate their unwanted pets so they can feed them to the animals. The zoo says they’ve now received enough "neighbor’s small, yippy dogs" to keep their animals well-fed for a year.
Got all of that?
Good. See you back here next week.