Patrons Hit The Deck As Jack Nicklaus Yanks Ceremonial Masters Tee Shot

It's Thursday, at The Masters. 

The best five words in golf, baby! We are BACK. Augusta is open for business, The Masters is underway, and all is well with the world. The forecast looks great all weekend. Jim Nantz is at the ready after having a few months to reset after 22 straight weeks of Tony Romo. 

It's just a beautiful time of year. The unofficial launch of springtime. Sure, it technically started a few weeks ago … but did it? I don't think so. 

In my mind, spring hasn't sprung until Jack Nicklaus tees it up at Augusta, and hits the ceremonial first shot to start the tournament. 

Just a nice, easy, beautiful ball right down the middle of the fairway. The Golden Bear never misses! Absolute stripe show every time.

… I said EVERY TIME!

Jack Nicklaus at 86 is better than anyone else at 86

One of us! One of us! One of us! For starters, how good does Jack Nicklaus look for 86? I'd KILL to be hooking shots into the pines at 86. If that's the case, I've done something right. I have my doubts, though. 

Look, it's not Jack's best, but it's probably his most relatable. We've all been there before, especially with an early tee time. Those are the worst. 

I've long said that I'm an afternoon golfer. I despise rolling out of bed and having to hit a golf ball. It's miserable. 

One time, I had an especially early tee time whilst on vacation in St. Augustine. The sun hadn't even come up fully yet. 

I stepped up to the first tee, still half-asleep (hungover), and shanked one so violently to the right, that I nearly took out a little girl who was there with her class on a trip. They were all on the putting green, which was to the right of the tee box, and I nearly sent her to the hospital. 

I was so scarred, I don't think I hit another shot until the turn. It was miserable. 

Anyway, I say all that to say this … Jack Nicklaus yanking one into the woods at 86 and nearly decaptiating someone is more impressive than anything any other 86-year-old on the planet will do today. 

Get that man a breakfast ball and get him back in the fairway, stat!