Prince Harry Will Livestream Therapy Session With 'Trauma Expert' In Transparent Attempt For More Attention

Prince Harry really just wants you to leave him alone.

So this Saturday, the Duke of Sussex will unpack all of his emotional baggage with renowned trauma expert Gabor Maté during a live, virtual event.

And you can buy tickets to this "intimate conversation" for just $33!

In the interest of privacy, Prince Harry recently released a tell-all memoir documenting everything that has ever happened in his life, including how he lost his virginity and the time he got frostbite on his penis. (Luckily, those were two separate incidents.)

Ticket prices to Saturday’s event include a hardcover copy of Harry’s book and the ability to submit a question for them to address during their hour-long chat.

(Photo by Matt Cardy/Getty Images)

Maté is a Hungarian-Canadian doctor with 20 years of experience in addiction and mental illness. He was also once threatened with arrest in Canada for using a 'spiritual' psychedelic drug to treat patients.

Prince Harry and Maté will focus on the impact of emotional loss and the importance of personal healing.

"My hope has been to turn my pain into purpose, so if sharing my experience makes a positive difference in someone's life, well, I can't think of anything more rewarding than that," Harry said.

Barf.

Listen, I'm all for therapy. And normalizing taking care of your mental health is a good thing. But you will simply not convince me that selling tickets to your therapy session is anything other than self-serving and narcissistic.

Especially when the entire point is to peddle your whiny book and add to your endless stack of money.

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle love to thrust themselves into the news cycle.

Harry's live therapy is just the latest example of the couple's attention-loving antics.

In its latest episode, “South Park” mocked Prince Harry and his wife Meghan.

The episode pokes fun at the couple’s claims that, “We just want to be left alone!” Meanwhile, they’re releasing books, doing tell-all sit-down interviews with Oprah, starring in a Netflix series and recording a podcast (that was cancelled after just 12 episodes).

Reportedly, Markle was “upset and overwhelmed” by the cartoon’s portrayal of her. Word on the streets (Twitter) is that the couple is also pursuing legal action.

That'll show 'em.

However, a week after bashing the ex-royals, the cartoon's creators appeared on the “Basic!” podcast. Trey Parker and Matt Stone discussed the cartoon's legacy and the uproars it caused.

While they didn’t address Harry and Meghan directly, they did say they've been sued multiple times during the show's 25-year run.

"We were considered counterculture," the animators said. "The Catholic League are always on our ass."

But the scientologist community came after them, too.

"I think that got us going," they said. "The Tom Cruise episode was really about getting sued. I mean, poking openly litigious people and seeing where the line is and what you can say. They picked a fight with us and we just went with it."

So I guess South Park doesn't care that they invaded Harry's privacy.

But maybe he can talk to his therapist about it. On a livestream. For the whole world to see.