Gwyneth Paltrow Pushes Father's Day Sex Toy, Will Levis' Girlfriend Wants Sticky Boobs, Holly Sonders Supports LIV, Hayley's Doing 75 Hard
Gwyneth Paltrow is clearly ready for Hump Day, so let's not mess around with small talk. This is a loaded buffett of Nightcaps, and we gotta eat! And don't say I didn't warn you - you're going to want to chow down before hearing Gwyneth's Father's Day gift idea - trust me.
Also, someone at OutKick's doing 75 hard (workouts, not jail time) and thankfully (on both fronts) it’s not me. More on Hayley's ambitions in a bit. In the meantime, we've gotta talk LIV Golf with linx queen Holly Sonders, needing sticky boobs with Will Levis' girlfriend, Gia Duddy, and so much more.
Sounds promising, right? It is. Let's just hope your Hump Day Nightcaps jaunt won't be quite as indecisive as my palette is while I'm writing this. See, I've got a little George Thorogood going on right now - I want one bourbon, one scotch, and one beer.
Then again, you only live once (I think), so let's suck down all three!
Holly Sonders Chirps The PGA In Defense Of LIV
No way was I going to start this thing off with Gwynnie's gifts, we're not drunk enough yet. But we are lubricated enough to enjoy some Holly Sonders. The soon-to-be Mrs. Oscar De La Hoya spent her Sunday roasting the PGA and anti-LIV Golf fans following Brooks Koepka's win at Oak Hill over the weekend.
Holly took to Twitter to ask where all the anti-LIV noise had gone.
And she didn't stop there. Sonders, who's course attire is seemingly only outdone by the legendary John Daly, made an apparent push for shorts on the course. And she obviously has no issue with LIV players trimming tournament play from 72 holes to 54.
"...they're kicking the PGA players asses," wrote Sonders.
Holly's well-versed in performing while wearing untraditional athletic attire, so I'm going to side with her on the shorts argument.
Now that I have your attention...you know what's maybe even dumber than golfers not being allowed to wear shorts during tournaments? Baseball managers wearing full uniforms and being requiring to have a number. I mean, WTF? I'm very much a traditionalist when it comes to uniforms, but I don't need Tommy Lasorda (RIP) in his full Mike Piazza getup 162 times a year.
Tommy Lasorda, like all MLB managers, goes full uniform, complete with number. (Photo by Christian Petersen/Getty Images).
Gia Duddy, Girlfriend Of Will Levis, Wants To Get Sticky
I bet under that full uniform Lasorda had something that new Titans QB Will Levis' girlfriend, Gia Duddy, so desperately wants - sticky boobs!
Yeah, Ms. Duddy, who I'm convinced was introduced to the internet by way of my Nightcaps brethren Zach Dean, went on TikTok over the weekend to tell her more than 474k followers about her adventures on the West Coast. Her trip included attending the NFLPA Rookie Premiere Wrap Party on Saturday with Levis - whom she needed to make her boobs sticky.
Deep breath. This isn't OnlyFans.
For those who aren't biological women or pretending to be ones today, apparently "sticky boobs" are used to keep the ta-tas in place when going braless in a particular type of dress. And you can buy the boob holsters at Target.
"I don't have sticky boobs so I sent Will to Target down the street," Duddy said on her TikTok.
One day you're a second-round NFL draft pick, the next, you're picking up sticky boobs at Target. Life comes at you fast.
Duddy also mentioned that before Levis went hunting for cha-cha tape, she sent a group text to some gal pals seeking sticky boobs for the evening since she came to the left coast unprepared. One girl apparently offered Duddy her SBs, but Levis was already on the way back with the goods.
Time out. Do girls just share sticky boobs on a regular basis? Seems almost like sharing underwear - something I'm not willing to do. But I don't have that answer.
Maybe Dylan Mulvaney does?
Levis, though, apparently dropped the ball.
“He got the wrong thing, but it’s OK,” Duddy said moments later.
For the sake of Duddy's boobs and her own well being, I hope she was able to find a way to get them sticky on Saturday evening. And for Tennessee's sake, let's hope Levis does a better job delivering passes than he does sticky boobs.
Speaking Of Target
If you've been pounding too many Bud Lights to notice, Target lacks proper sticky boob equipment, but does provide women's bathing suits designed to store other equipment. In addition to introducing a Pride Kids and Baby section, Target now offers "tuck-friendly" swimsuits. Dance around it all you want, but these swimsuits are very specifically for dudes who want to hide their hammer and pretend they're ladies.
However, the toolbox doesn't always properly contain the tools, so Target may want to go back to the design lab.
BlazeTV host Alex Stein shared as much during his Mulvaney moment on Tuesday.
75 Hard With Hayley Caronia
You probably won't find OutKick Producer/TikTok wiz Hayley Caronia perusing the aisles and swimwear section of Target anytime soon - for a number of reasons. But one of those reasons is because she likely doesn't have the damn time because she's too busy doing healthy stuff like the "75 Hard" challenge.
If you're not familiar, Hayley is in the first week of the workout/wellness challenge which is described as such:
Over 75 consecutive days, you're supposed to:
-Complete two 45-minute workouts, one indoor and one outdoor.
-Drink a gallon of water
-Follow a diet
-Consume NO alcohol
-Read 10 pages of a book
-Take a progress picture every day
Andy Frisella is the brainchild and creator behind the 75 Hard challenge.
I don't know Andy, but he sounds like the devil. As I contemplated my Chick-fil-A drive thru order and burped off the last of my weeknight six-pack (the beer, not the abs...not even close) I wondered what would make anyone torture themselves in such a way. So I sucked in my gut, decided to upsize to a large and asked Hayley the hard hitters, her answers are below:
" I've always been intrigued by the mental challenge of it all. It was something that I thought other crazy people did, and never thought I'd be able to stick to it. I work out 6 days a week for 45 minutes as it is, so upping it to 7 days and adding in a lighter, outdoor 45-minute workout won't kill me...right? I've talked to some friends who have done it, and that was the kick in the ass I needed. If they can do it, I can do it."
"My 75 days are from May 22-Aug 5, and my birthday DOES land within that time frame, so I'm allowing myself to drink on that day, July 15th, and that day only. According to Andy Frisella's standards, if you mess up at all, you have to restart the 75 days. I legitimately do not care about my health enough to not ring in the last year of my 20s with tequila shots."
Wait, did someone say tequila shots?
There's a whole bunch of working out that's part of Hayley's routine, but that doesn't sound nearly as hard as the rest.
"I've got a 73 oz jug that I'll be using to drink a gallon of water a day. Filling it up twice puts me at just over 1 gallon. As it is, I only drink water, coffee and alcohol. I'm not a soda drinker or a juice drinker, so the real challenge is the volume.
I'm not following a diet per se, but I will be committed to eating whole foods, upping my protein intake, cutting down completely on unhealthy snacking, and I will stop eating at 8 PM CST every day.
I will be finishing Where The Crawdads Sing, and after that, I'll read 10 pages of the Bible each night before bed. Normally, I just scroll through TikTok and Twitter.
I'll take a picture every morning after my gym class."
As of just before 10am EST today, Hayley tells me the worst part about 75 HARD is the water consumption. "Basically, OutKick is going to be paying me to spend a lot of time in the restroom until August rolls around."
Coincidentally, OutKick's been paying me to spend a bunch of time in the restroom too, so looks like we're both a part of this challenge.
Godspeed, Hayley.
Gwyneth Paltrow Wants Butt Stuff For Father's Day
75 Hard sounds painful. Yet, it's nowhere near as painful as the Father's Day gift opening experience for any dad's who raised a Gwyneth Paltrow fan.
Paltrow took to her Goop wellness site to promote the $219 butt blaster as part of their Father's Day gift guide.
“Father’s Day gift ideas often fall into familiar categories: beer, ball games, BBQs. And we’re not saying you should take those options off the table — you might even double down with a fun new spin on one," says the guide's description.
I would prefer if Gwyneth Paltrow and her butt stuff would steer clear of me this Father's Day. (Photo by Layne Murdoch Jr./Getty Images for goop).
To my wife (who may be reading) and my kids (who shouldn't be reading), if left with no other options, I'd much prefer a "tuck-friendly" Target bathing suit to Gwyneth's suggestion on Father's Day.
Gift Dad Some Mineral Water Instead
I have a better Father's Day idea for pops. Actually, just about any idea would be better than Gwyneth's $219 dollar backside surprise. That said, I'd ditch Goop for Hoop and get dad some Arvydas Sabonis-endorsed mineral water!
Chances are this is no longer around, but I stumbled upon some h2o Sabonis was hocking back in the '90s and it looks as fabulous as his game. And if the water is/was half as pleasing as the commercial I recently stumbled upon to promote it, dad would be a happy man come June 19.
If that doesn't scream "athlete," nothing does.
Back when Sportscenter was still cool there may not have been a better line than when Craig Kilborn would narrate Blazers highlights by dropping a “He’s not my Vydas, he’s not your Vydas, he’s Arvydas," on viewers.
I Pity The Fool!
Mr. T was nearly as cool as Sabonis back in the '90s, but he was certainly it in the '80s. Despite his popularity, Clubber Lang's been largely absent from the public eye for the last 20 or so years. Until last week!
The 70-year-old actor was spotted leaving a drug store in Los Angeles. He was masked up - how very LA of him - and did his best to go incognito. Missing were the signature gold chains, bulging muscles and (I think) mohawk.
Photo courtesy of the Daily Mail and @Coleman-Rayner.
Next Week: Same Time, Same Place
Alright, alright, alright - I'm channeling my inner Wooderson and peeling out of here courtesy of Melba Toast. We'll do it again next week - hopefully without any Gwyneth Paltrow suggestions. But before I leave you, enjoy the best of the 'net!
I have to chime in here - this is what a football player should look like (below). Get the hell off my lawn if you feel otherwise.
Want to talk T.J. Duckett or anything other than Father's Day gifts? Email me: anthony.farris@outkick.com or yell at me on Twitter (below).
*OutKick’s Nightcaps is a daily column that runs weekdays around 4pm EST.
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