Will Levis' Sister Got Tan In Miami, Kay Adams Throws Herself At Shams, Nude Girls On Herbie's Twitter & 'Super Fat' Southwest Passengers
After three days of self-reflection, poor golf, staying off social media and heavy drinking, I think I'm ready to get back on the horse. No, the First Lady didn't dump me or anything like that -- I was just trying to recover from Will Levis literally stuffing my cocky ass in a locker Monday night.
Last time I ever get my hopes up for the frauds down in Miami. This time, I mean it! Until we win Sunday, of course. But until then, I am DONE.
At least we got a bronze Kelley Levis out of it. If the Fins had to lose for the world to get new Kelley Levis content, so be it. We'll take the bullet. You're welcome.
More on Will Levis and his sis in a bit.
Welcome to a Thursday Nightcaps -- the official start of the weekend this time of year. Congrats! You've made it to Easton Stick vs. Aiden O'Connell. What a reward for a hard-fought week.
Kirk Herbstreit will once again be on the call tonight, so we'll talk about his Twitter game lately. He shot off the longest tweet in the history of time yesterday, and then I discovered while scrolling through his feed that Elon threw some racy ads on his page. Nice. We'll dive in.
What else? Horny Kay Adams basically throwing herself at Shams Charania on live TV? Sure, why not? Those two are 100% banging. They have to be at this point. If not, I need Shams to email me ASAP so I can help him hit the easy layup.
We'll also talk about fat people getting an extra seat on the house over at Southwest Airlines, because it's hilarious and ridiculous all at the same time. At least we get to hear the term "super fat" used in a serious way. Can't beat that.
OK, I'm sure we'll find other things to talk about, but that's enough for now. Grab a holiday ale and settle in for a Thursday 'Cap that'll get you all geared up for another awful Thursday night game!
Kelley Levis had herself a good weekend in Miami while Will Levis ruined my holiday season
As much as it pained me to watch, I was proud of our man Will Levis Monday night. Between Kelley Levis and Gia Duddy, we've been all aboard the Will Levis train since last April, so it was nice to see him explode on the national stage.
Again, it hurt me like hell, but it is what it is. Bigger picture.
Anyway, all that to say sister Kelley Levis made the trip with the Titans down to Miami -- weird that she would choose South Beach for her big away game trip! -- and she acted accordingly:
What a month for Kirk Herbstreit
Glad you enjoyed your stay in the great, big, beautiful, free state of Florida, Kelley! Come back any time.
Now, let's check in with Kirk Herbstreit, who has been in a full on war with angry FSU fans ever since the Seminoles were left out of the CFB playoff.
Herbie was pretty much off the FSU train before the committee even made their decision, and when he was proven right FSU twitter lost their collective minds.
Well, it looks like they're no longer alone!
My God -- what a tweet! The trolls have done it. They've officially driven Herbstreit insane. Just insane rambling here from Kirk.
Buddy, thread me one time. Just try it.
Anyway, that's not all from our man ...
While perusing Kirk's twitter page after spending eight minutes reading that post, I discovered THIS:
Kay Adams and Shams are TVs horniest secret couple
Poor Kirk! One minute you're writing a novel of a post, the next your page is filled with AI nude generators. Wild times on Elon's app right now, and I'm obviously here for it.
UNDRE SS any girl using AI, yoo. Seems legit!
Now, let's head on over to the Up & Adams show to check in on Kay Adams and Shams Charania -- AKA TVs horniest secret couple for a year strong now:
Southwest, In-&-Out and scenes from the White House
"You know how I feel about you ................................
...................... and this show."
Yeah, OK Shams. I heard it. I saw it. Appreciate you trying to cover your tracks, but the jig is up. I've been on the Kay Adams-Shams beat for a year now, and it's undeniable at this point. Just an elite power couple.
Kay Adams will always be welcome to this class, by the way. No questions asked.
OK, let's grab some In-&-Out and head for the Southwest terminal!
Psychos. There's no other way to describe that other than a bunch of psychos. I live in Florida, so we obviously don't have In-&-Out here. Frankly, I'm not sure I've ever been. Maybe once about 10 years ago during a family trip to California (yuck), but if we went, I don't remember it at all.
It just can't be that good. It's not possible. Nothing in life is worth an 8-hour wait in a drive-thru line, right?
I once waited about two hours in a line at Halloween Horror Nights for the Stranger Things house, and I can promise you that will be the last time I ever do that. The payoff will never be worth the wait.
Sex? Sex may be the only thing in your life that will be worth the wait, and even then you're waiting years and years and years -- decades, even -- for what? 30 seconds? I don't think so.
Now, for the people who did make it to the front of that line, do I (probably) have a deal for you!
A plus-size travel expert and TikToker, Jae'lynn Chaney, told Fox News Digital it was an important move to include people in the "super fat" category.
"Super fat is how we identify," Chaney, business owner of Jae Bae Productions, said. "There's a spectrum of fatness. And as a super fat individual, you start needing different accommodations… I just felt really happy that there was something like this for people."
"Super fat is how we identify" is maybe the most 2023 sentence I've ever heard. When my kids ask me what the year 2023 was like, I will just repeat that line and they'll know exactly what it was like.
I may also show them this video from TikToker Jae'Lynn just to really drive my point home:
"We are not asking for special treatment or luxury accommodations." Nah. Just an extra seat or two for free. That's all.
Imagine the scenes we're gonna get in the coming weeks from the Southwest boarding line when they call out "passengers with disabilities, children under two, and those who weigh over 300 are now free to board at this time."
Can't wait.
Finally, if all of that isn't enough to truly convince my kids how miserable 2023 was, I'll throw this on the screen and let the chips fall where they may:
Austin Ekeler's fiancée gets us ready for a big night of awful football
For the Trump and DeSantis folks who all of a sudden hate each other after being best friends for four years, can ya'll please just watch that and agree to vote red, no matter the candidate? Feel like we can all agree on that, right?
And on that weird, depressing, pathetic note -- let's go have a night!
Save us, Melanie Wilking.
OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).
Did Will Levis and Kelley Levis leave Miami in shambles or what? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.