Jennifer Welch Reveals Vile, Sadistic Plan To Expose MAGA Men & Their Penises

If you think LIB podcast icon Jennifer Welch has been vile and disgusting in the past, she just took things to a whole new level on the latest episode of her "I've Had It" show with her friend Pumps. 

In the "Secret Lives of MAGA Men" episode, Welch revealed the sadistic plan in her head to have Americans watch politicians get erections while watching gay porn. Seriously. This woman is the biggest icon in the LIB movement and this is how she energizes the base. 

Jennifer Welch speaks onstage during One Story. One Future: GLAAD Celebrates Pride 2025 at 1 Hotel Brooklyn Bridge on June 26, 2025 in Brooklyn, New York. (Photo by Bryan Bedder/Getty Images for GLAAD)

"If I were a dictator, I would line up all the penises of every member of Congress and Senate and I would hook their penises up to this testing […] and I would play various different types of porn," Welch explained.

Again, those are her words. She wants to out politicians as being gay by testing their penises for erections while watching gay porn. And women across the country are eating up this form of rule.

MORE: Nasty LIB Podcasters Launch Attack On MAGA's Manhood

"I would have it live-streamed, so everybody in the whole country could enjoy who is getting an erection, Lady Graham, when they watch certain types of porn," she continued while taking a shot at Lindsey Graham. 

"And so the point of this is that nobody gives a s--t if somebody's gay. Nobody gives a s--t if somebody's trans. Nobody gives a s--t if Big Titty Bryon wants to have big titties," she added, while taking a shot at Bryon Noem, the husband of Kristi Noem, who is accused of enjoying living a fetish lifestyle. 

"What we care about is the hypocrisy. Ostracizing people during the day that you're fetishizing at night. And now the science backs it all up. All of these homophobic men probably like to watch gay porn. And here's the thing, there's nothing f--king wrong with it. Who gives a s--t? They do. They're embarrassed that they like penis. And so I just want to put up this next one, and this is important," Welch railed. 

Jennifer Welch and Angie Sullivan accept the award for Outstanding Podcast Episode for I've Had It 'Straight Panic, Gay Excellence' at the 37th GLAAD Media Awards held at the Beverly Hilton on March 05, 2026 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Michael Buckner/Variety via Getty Images)

"Bryon Noem reportedly told his dom, he has this dom on Only Fans, he wants to be a trans bimbo slut named Crystal. And here's the thing: I want to live in a world where Big Titty Bryon gets to be a trans bimbo slut named Crystal because I think if that's what he wants to do, swing for the fences. It's a free country. But Christine Noem wants to live in a world where she kidnaps kids and sends people off to concentration camps and dehumanizes them and has a police force that shoots innocent protesters. And so I mean these f--king fascists, Pumps, are just more than I can take. 

"But it was before Trump. All of these sanctimonious, Bible-thumping Christians I always know when they're wound up about gays, and now you know the ones that are wound up about trans issues. These are the people that pull an all-nighter yanking off to trans porn. That's just what's happening."

READ: Jennifer Welch Launches Nasty Attack On Minnesota Churchgoers, Calls Them 'White Nationalists'

Co-host Pumps finally stepped in and praised Welch for her commitment to hating MAGA men for years to which Welch replied she dreams of outing Graham, Mike "Grinder" Johnson and her other target. "I want Ted Cruz's if we can find it," she said of the Texas politician's penis. 

"If it's not inverted, I want that thing hooked up. I want to see what it reacts to." 

Jennifer Welch during her "Sweet Home Oklahoma" reality show days on Bravo.  (Photo by: Brett Deering/Bravo/Photo Bank)

As for the rest of basic MAGA men, Welch continued to spout off her theory about the Trump movement. 

"My theory is you can always tell when a man has poor sexual performance or a small penis because they have big trucks with big tires or big motorcycles or you know they tell you how big they are."

This is what the tolerant left is not only thinking, but cheering for. Let that sink in.