Jared Goff Goes Fishing And Reels In Disgusting Detroit Underwear

Jared Goff is just one of us.

The Detroit Lions' QB experienced what every single one of us has at one time experienced during a fishing trip.

You cast the line, feel a tug, set the hook and start reeling in what you believe to be an absolute MONSTER.

You're heart's racing, arm throbbing, and imagination bursting with all the different possibilities of what's at the other end of that line.

Your buddy goes to grab the net -- it's real, now -- and this sea monster is almost at the surface. You take a quick swig of Busch Light, give one last hard reel, and squint through your polarized Costas to see what's gonna break through that water.

What's the verdict, Jared?!

Oh no, Jared.

Reeling in a pair of undies is a rough look, it doesn't matter who you are. Seaweed? Fine. But underwear ... from Detroit ... has to be beyond gross.

Speaking of the Motor City ... center Frank Ragnow with the quick "that's Detroit at its finest" line is perfect.

And how about Goff trying to save face by saying it felt as heavy as a fish would feel?

When the panties weren't fighting back at all while you were reeling them in, shouldn't that have been some sort of a clue?

Anyways, who am I to talk? I go fishing for the cooler of beer, not the thrill of the dance. If anyone is like Jared Goff in this situation, it's yours truly.

Finally ... you can't let Dan Campbell see this video, right?

My guess is the same guy who once threatened to kick you in the teeth and bite off a kneecap wouldn't confuse a largemouth bass with a pair of Underoos.

Written by
Zach grew up in Florida, lives in Florida, and will never leave Florida ... for obvious reasons. He's a reigning fantasy football league champion, knows everything there is to know about NASCAR, and once passed out (briefly!) during a lap around Daytona. He swears they were going 200 mph even though they clearly were not.