Deranged Trump-Hater Mark Hamill Has Major Update On Luke Skywalker Being Gay

Star Wars legend Mark Hamill, who famously played Luke Skywalker in the original trilogy, has absolutely massive news on what he calls the most pressing question from his fans …

"Is Luke Skywalker gay?"

Sure thing, Mark. Whatever you say! Star Wars fans — I'm a huge one, by the way — have just been dying to know the answer to that question for decades now. Some of us lose sleep at night. I personally haven't slept well since ‘03 because I just sit up all night wondering if Luke had ever banged Han Solo. 

It’s all I think about some days. 

Anyway, for those still trying to piece it all together, take a breath … Mark has your answer. 

"If you want him to be gay, he is," Hamill told the gaming website, Polygon.com. "If you don't want him to be, he's not. It's whatever you want."

Mark Hamill is all in on Luke Skywalker being gay

Incredible. What an amazing timeline we live in. Sure, some would also say it's an absolutely miserable timeline, and that's fair, too. I'm not sure a day goes by where, at some point, I don't say, "Man, take me back to the 90s." 

I've already said it four times this morning, and it's not even 8 a.m. yet. 

Anyway, Luke Skywalker never married in the Star Wars films, but he did kiss his sister. So, you know, read into that what you will. By Mark's logic, can we now consider Luke an inbred? I don't know. Maybe. He said we can make him whoever we want!

Look, it's Mark Hamill in 2026, so we have to take this all with a grain of salt. If you haven't kept up with Luke after all these years, he's become insufferable. Truly, and I mean truly, insufferable. He succumbed to Trump Derangement Syndrome about a decade ago, and it's reached critical stages in recent years. 

The 2024 election really broke him. It was a tough watch. Mark was so convinced that Kamala would win, and when she got stuffed in a locker, he sort of just broke. He left Twitter, bolted for Bluesky, and we haven't really heard from him since. 

Until now, of course. Every few years, he interrupts the world to remind us that Star Wars was very progressive, and Luke Skywalker could have been gay. He did this same thing in 2016, along with the equally insufferable JJ Abrams, who promised to diversify the Star Wars prequels and then promptly burned the franchise to the ground. 

Nice work, JJ!

Anyway, Luke Skywalker was gay if you wanted him to be, folks. Carry on.