Miami Dolphins Fans Raise Money To Fly Banner Over Stadium After Putrid Loss & You'll Never Guess What It Says

If you're a miserable Miami Dolphins fan like me, and you're ready for real change, I think I may have the ticket. 

Following last Sunday's pathetic/embarrassing/disgusting/humiliating/soul-sucking loss to the Colts to open the season, fans in Coral Gables have evidently had enough. Why it took this long, I have no idea. Frankly, I wanted this whole "rebuild" blown to smithereens last season, but Chris Grier was/is too stubborn to do it. 

So, naturally, we've wasted an entire offseason going around in circles, and now we're forced to sit through maybe the most miserable roster I've ever seen. 

Anyway, fans are doing their best to get the ball rolling, and have started a GoFundMe to pay for a banner to fly over Miami's home-opener Sunday against New England.

You'll never guess what it's gonna say!

I'm all in!

Incredible. Yes! Sign me up, baby! I will donate my entire OutKick paycheck to this, and payday is tomorrow, so that works well!

Here's the official description of this bad boy, in all of its glory:

My brother is expecting his first born son this year, and it got him thinking about generational trauma. As our family was gathered for the first Dolphins game of the season, he asked an important moral question, "is it fair to my son to raise him as a Dolphins fan? They've been trash for 25 years, and with this front office, they will be trash for another 25 years. It was my curse, but it doesn't have to be his cross to bear. I can break the cycle."

This is the state of Dolphins fandom in 2025. We have not won a playoff game since before 9/11. I'm not saying there's any connection there, but you do the math.

While it would be easy to blame Sporano, Wan-stash, Bill Parcels, Philbin, McDaniels, etc, the real culprit here is the front office. For decades, we have watched quarterback after quarterback get pummeled into the dirt because his offensive line is composed of nothing but turnstiles and matadors, and the occasional all-pro left tackle that we lose after we refuse to pay him.

I have great sympathy for the front office staff. This is one of, if not the premiere sports league in the world. You are competing with the best and the brightest. It's a very difficult job. But at some point, if you can't find a way to field a competitive team, after multiple seasons of failure, it's time to move on and find somebody who can.

But for some reason (I'm assuming he has compromising photos) Chris Grier keeps shopping for o-linemen at the island of misfit toys. If I worked at Dairy Queen and was this bad at my job, I would have been fired years ago. It's only fair to treat Chris Grier the same.

I understand that asking you to donate money to fly a banner asking for someone to be fired may feel mean, but please, think of Tua and his family. If we keep trotting out empty potato sacks to block for him, he will get irreparably mauled on the field at Joe Robbie, and we will all have to look ourselves in the mirror knowing that we could have done something about it.

For the sake of mercy and justice, we must #firechrisgrier

THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER!

UPDATE #1: By popular demand, McDaniel has been added to the banner.

UPDATE #2: Any funds raised above the goal will be donated to Concussion/CTE Research in honor of all the Dolphins QBs this organization has scrambled.

UPDATE#3: A few Dol-fans have reached out asking to add Tua to the banner, but as disappointed as I am with his performance this season, I'm not going to shame the victim of Chris Grier's refusal to assemble a competent o-line. It's not Tua's fault that he's slow reading coverages after all the brutal hits he's taken. The fact that he's still walking and can remember his name is a miracle. I hope he finds a better team that will actually value his life after he leaves Miami.

UPDATE #4: Wow, that was fast. I'll book the plane tomorrow morning and post an update here with the confirmed date and time of the flight.

Amazing. Couldn't have said it any better myself. Every single word of it is true, although I'd also put plenty of blame on Tua. 

I'm a Tua guy. Always have been. I've defended this dude for five years now. But he's changed, both on and off the field, for the worse. 

He's clearly regressed as an NFL QB, which is shocking given he's only 27. He was terrible last weekend, and it wasn't all on the offensive line. He missed passes I could hit in my sleep. I'd add him to the banner, too! 

As for the off the field stuff … listen to one presser, and you'll see what I mean. Dude got paid last summer and is a totally different person now, which is wild given he has as many playoff wins as I do. 

Tua, McDaniel and Chris Grier are all tied at the hip, or at least they should be. If/when one goes – all should go. Blow it up. Start over. Cut your losses. 

Let's get that bird in the sky, Dol-fans!