Naked Woman Tripping On Mushrooms Tackles Lady By The Hair In Vicious Airport Attack

Stop the fight: we have an undisputed new leader in the wild airport videos clubhouse. I know, you're probably tired of these. The crazy plane lady from the summer was cool and all, but everything else that's come after is sort of just old news now.

But not this one. This video, boys and girls, is what the internet was made for.

This airport incident involves drugs, a completely naked woman, and one of the most vicious tackles you'll ever see.

If it were the NFL, this chick would be fined and suspended so quickly your head would spin. I don't know if that's the protocol in Chile, though.

Let's head there now and watch the tape to find out! And yes, her boobs are blurred out. If you want the non-blurry version, you can look it up yourself. I prefer to keep my job.

Naked woman on the loose in Chile airport

Ding, ding, ding! Winner winner, turkey dinner!

Holy cow. What a video. What a scene at this Chilean airport. Mushrooms are one hell of a drug.

This little episode took place at Nuevo Pudahuel Airport in Pudahuel, which is right outside Santiago, Chile. The Emol news agency -- whatever that is -- reports that our girl here consumed hallucinogenic mushrooms at a party before heading to the airport to catch her flight last week.

Gee, ya think?

For those who have ever consumed mushrooms -- and I haven't, I promise -- I'd imagine your advice to this naked chick would be ... don't do them before boarding a plane. I feel like that's usually the route to go if you're gonna trip balls.

Trip them all you want, I'm not judging, but just don't plan on going to the airport -- or anywhere for that matter -- when you do.

Because this is what can happen. You can wind up completely naked, running up and down the terminal hallways and making the most brutal ponytail tackle you'll ever see.

Seriously, that was one hell of a takedown. Defenders used to do that all the time to Ricky Williams -- hey, I bet he's done mushrooms! Hell, they used to tackle poor Ricky by the dreads so much that it forced the NFL to make a rule that said hair was now part of the uniform.

So, by those standards, this would actually be a clean tackle in today's NFL. Good form!

Anyway, looks like our girl here is gonna wake up with one hell of a mushroom hangover, and she'll probably do so chained to a desk at a nearby Chilean mental facility. Can't wait to hear her side of the story. It has to be WILD.

PS: how about the security guards there in the orange vests just ... watching. Not the best look, but to be fair, I'd also want nothing to do with this chick, either. It's called making a business decision.