Howard Stern Wants To Run Against Donald Trump In 2024: ‘I’ll Beat His A–‘

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The King of All Masks, Howard Stern, is suddenly feeling presidential. On Monday the shock jock turned kitten-loving liberal loser declared his intentions to run for president, if he can do so opposite former president Donald Trump.

“I’ll beat his ass,” said Stern, 68, during his SiriusXM radio show, “The Howard Stern Show.

Someone should remind Stern that in order to run, he’d be required to actually leave his house – something he’s been unwilling to do in the two-plus years that COVID’s been around.

“The problem with most presidents is they have too big of an agenda,” Stern told his listeners. “The only agenda I would have is to make the country fair again.”

Seems like another way of saying “Make America Great Again.” Who’s ready to trade those MAGA hats in for a couple of MTCFG ones?


After listing a number of drastic and unrealistic changes he’d make upon taking office, Stern – who once entertained listeners and viewers by throwing bologna onto naked women –  relayed his idea for revamping the Supreme Court.

“The other thing is, if I do run for president, and I’m not f – – king around, I’m really thinking about it, because the only other thing I’m going to do is appoint five more Supreme Court justices,” insisted Stern.

He continued: “I’m not afraid to do it. As soon as I become president, you’re gonna get five new Supreme Court justices that are going to overturn all this bullshit.”

Spoken like a man. Fartman, that is.

Howard Stern

Follow along on Twitter: @OhioAF

Written by Anthony Farris


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