ESPN’s Dan Orlovsky Gets Himself In Stinky Situation, Reveals Wife’s Bathroom Habits

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Dan Orlovsky spent most of his NFL career as a #2, but that’s not something his wife wants to be associated with. At least not within the Orlovsky bathroom.

During a Tuesday appearance on The Pat McAfee Show, Orlovsky revealed that his wife doesn’t relieve herself when he’s at home. Instead, she waits for her husband to exit before allowing her bowels to do the same.

First off, who knew girls pooped? Not me.

And secondly, I’m sure Mrs. Orlovsky is just thrilled that Dan opted for toilet talk – with her as the main character- on national radio.

Ready the divorce lawyers!

Dan Orlovsky Knows What Is And Isn’t Going Down

In the midst of Dan Orlovsky’s national radio appearance, a sound could be heard coming from the background of his home. When McAfee asked the quarterback-turned-ESPN analyst if someone had been using the bathroom, Orlovsky quickly called an audible.

“No, it’s my wife upstairs shutting the dryer or something, she didn’t poop,” insisted Orlovsky.

Ok then.

Rather than move on, Dan Orlovsky let the topic circle the bowl and elaborated on the Mrs. and her must-be-full tummy.

“My wife won’t poop when I’m in the house. If I’m in the house, my wife will not go to the bathroom,” Orlovsky added.

Dan Orlovsky told Pat McAfee about his wife’s pooping plans. (Photo by Rob Carr/Getty Images).

Plenty Of Questions Surround The Orlovsky Bathroom

With that, Orlovsky left us with more questions than answers.

The biggest question has to be: Why won’t Mrs. O drop the kids off at the pool once they’re ready? I assume the Orlovsky’s aren’t hunkering down in a studio apartment. I’d set the over/under on the amount of bathrooms in their house at 4. I think that’s reasonable for a guy who, per Over The Cap, made $4 million dollars in his NFL career and now works at ESPN.

Yet, Tiffany Orlovsky can’t find a spot to do her business?

Other unanswered questions that come to mind:

What happens when they’re on vacation?

Dan has a day off, now what?

If Dan’s at home and the stomach starts rumbling, does Tara hop in the car and pound the pedal to the nearest public restroom? Does she have a prefered public pooping spot in the Connecticut area?

For the record, if I’m out and about and don’t have time to make it to home base, I’m hitting the nearest hotel lobby. They’re clean, roomy and unassuming. Take note Mrs. Orlovsky.

I have no idea if the Orlovsky family plays any backyard football. But for the sake of Mrs. Orlovsky, let’s hope the snap count is always on one and never two.

Follow along on Twitter: @OhioAF

Written by Anthony Farris

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