True Romance: Escort Brings Work Home By Dating Clients, Couple Tries Open Relationship & Home Depot Proposal
Welcome to the last Thursday of May. The unofficial start to summer arrived this week, and we're staring down the next few months of warmer weather and romance.
This week's edition of True Romance is a roller-coaster ride. We get things started with a professional escort who likes to bring her work home with her.
Yep, she dates her clients. Which is convenient, but we all know convenient doesn’t necessarily mean it's a good idea. What about burnout? It can’t always be work, work, work.
SIGN UP for The Daily OutKick. New Look, Same Attitude.
From there, a couple of high school sweethearts think they're ready, now that they're in their late 20s, to open up their relationship. They've only ever been with each other after all.
He doesn’t know if he's any good at sex, and she's getting "bi-curious," so they decide to dip their toes in the open relationship waters with a threesome. Good idea.
Then it's complete madness in the plumbing aisle of a Home Depot. A man's girlfriend takes a joke proposal without an actual ring as a real proposal.
She set the trap and when he walked right into it, he ended up an engaged man. This is not romance. This is deception and, unless he wants to spend the rest of his life getting suckered into things, he needs to put an end to it.
Before we dive into it, go follow True Romance on Twitter and Facebook.
Professional Escort Brings Her Work Home With Her By Dating Clients
How do you relax and unwind after a long day of professional escorting? One would assume that you did so without any reminders of the stresses of work. Maybe with a hobby.
That approach probably works for some, but not 29-year-old Katija Cortez. The former accountant with three years in her new profession as an escort sort of "fell into" the line of work. She hopped on the OnlyFans money train and never looked back.
"Anything to avoid going back to accounting. The adult industry was never a Plan A, or something I had considered before, but I had a very expensive writing degree to pay for, very high rent to cover and I was envious of all the girls making money on OnlyFans while I spent the previous three years doing complex work, for unreasonably long hours, for what felt like less than minimum wage," she told the Daily Star.
Despite the risk of burnout from bringing her work home with her, she admits that she does date her clients. Not just on occasion either. It's just easier for her.
A professional escort reveals that she takes her work home with her and dates her clients. (Image Credit: Getty)
"Yes, I mostly date clients! I’ve dated four clients during my tenure. I find it so much easier because they already know what I do," she said.
"I know straight away whether or not we are sexually compatible. I find out a lot of information about them off the bat - marital status, job, income, investments. I get to see the real them."
It's that raw connection that allows for the bound to form. Although no two clients are the same. They've all got their own preferences, and she's learned a lot from her current career.
"I don’t really believe in monogamy anymore. I’ve seen enough married men to know that monogamy just doesn’t work," Katija explained.
"Majority of the married men seeing me are the nice guys - the ones nobody would ever expect. So it’s not just the 'F-Boy types' who are seeing me, it’s the nice guys too. There is always a breaking point."
That doesn’t mean she doesn’t believe in love. She does. Who knows, maybe one of the clients she ends up dating will turn out to be Mr. Right. She still wants to get married one day.
"I do still believe in love and do hope that I’ll be married one day - I just don’t think any future relationships of mine will be traditional or monogamous. I’ve learnt in this job that multiple things can be true at one time," she said.
"My married clients can enjoy having sex with me, and can also still be totally devoted and in love with their wives at the same time."
Now that gives you a warm and fuzzy feeling, doesn’t it? No wonder she doesn’t get burned out taking her work home with her. She's still able, somehow, to separate the two.
Good for her. I'm sure she'll make someone very happy one day.
This Week in True Romance:
High School Sweethearts Have Threesome To Test Drive An Open Relationship
Next up, a couple of high school sweethearts who met at the age of 17. They've made to their late 20s, believe it or not, and have decided that it's time to try something new.
Better now than waiting until they're middle-aged, and she's a minivan-driving soccer mom having regrets over the what-ifs. While he's working a miserable job that he hates and spends most of the day fantasizing about the threesomes he never got to have.
The two wanted to give an open relationship a try by having a threesome on a reality TV show. That is a perfect plan if you ask me. The show Open House: The Great Sex Experiment, which LadBible reports, is for monogamous couples to give opening up their relationships a try.
It's described as a "more therapeutic experience" than other reality shows. The couples get to work with relationship coaches and sex experts. They're not simply jumping into bed blindly.
High school sweethearts have been together for 10 years and want to open their relationship, so they had a threesome to give an open relationship a test drive. (Image Credit: Getty)
They're in the house for 48 hours with 25 other non-monogamous people willing to bang them. The high school sweethearts Paul, 28, and Chloe, 27, have only ever slept with each other.
That led Paul to start wondering whether he was any good at having sex or not, he revealed in an interview about why the couple wanted to open up their relationship.
Chloe, on the other hand, had started wondering if she might be bisexual and describes herself as "bi-curious." There's your answer, Paul. I'm kidding, of course.
There are a million reasons, other than your partner being bad in bed, for wondering if you're into women. So the two dipped their toes in and had a threesome with a woman named Grace.
Chloe said of the reality show threesome, "It's a nice experience. It's something new. Like I think it's just contentment."
Paul said, "It's exciting because it's like we've opened up a new world. I feel reborn, I'm just missing the cigar."
There you have it. Another successful threesome for a couple of high school sweethearts making their way in life.
Home Depot proposal
Now to the trap skillfully set in the plumbing aisle of a Home Depot. Be careful out there and keep this in the back of your mind. You don’t want to get caught in the same trap.
Next thing you know, she's tricking you into having kids, buying her expensive jewelry and cars. When does it end?
Do you shell out a ton of money and work 60 hours a week to buy her a dream home with a pool? Does she then need a pool boy?
Before you know what hit you, the decision to go along with a joke proposal as if it was real has you losing it all in divorce. Think about the alimony and child support.
Don't do what this guy did and get caught in the trap. He explained, "My girlfriend and I were at Home Depot picking out a new shower head. We were joking around, pretending to ‘roleplay’ as boring suburban homeowners."
He threw out an obvious joke and said something along the lines of, "I just want to build a life with you and maybe tile a backsplash someday."
She took that as sounding like a proposal and tossed out the trap by mentioning it to him. He then, like a "dramatic idiot" his words not mine, got down on one knee in the plumbing aisle with a washer ring in his hand and said, "Will you marry me, babe?"
It was all fun and games until he was sitting in the middle of the trap his girlfriend had skillfully set for him. She heard something that sounded nothing like a proposal and turned it around on him. She said, "Dead serious. Eyes misty. Voice shaking. ‘Yes. Oh my God, yes.’"
That was that. He froze and panicked. He knew he wasn’t proposing for real. Hell, she knew it too, but he said the words, and she knew she had him. He ended up going with it.
Now he's engaged. The families have been informed and there's now a group chat to get the ball rolling on those wedding plans.
He added, "I still haven’t told her it wasn’t real."
You don’t have to buddy. She set the whole thing up from the moment she heard an opening. She knew it wasn’t real. But guess what it is now.
Buckle up and hang on for that ride to alimony and child support. It's coming, and she's going to be laying traps every step of the way.
Sydney Bath Bar
- Paul from St. Paul writes:
Seanie,
Holy Kimonos!
There are suckers everywhere, eh?
A certificate of authenticity doesn't mean one iota on this fetish fantasy trip because the more likely scenario is that the bath water used to make these "Sydney" soap bars either rolled-off cousin Jeb after a day at the mines or was piped-in to the manufacturing facility in Bangladesh from the Ganges River- which is the largest bathwater source in the world!!
In any event, just skip the sucker bet here and keep one of her low-cut dress photos nearby if you need your Sydney fix.
Best,
PCA
StP, Mn.
SeanJo
Thanks for reaching out about the Sydney Sweeney selling her bathwater story Paul. I appreciate her for giving her fans what they want.
Or at least playing along as if she is.
What I don’t understand is the whole bathwater fetish in the first place. If you or anyone else does get it, please reach out and let me know what I'm missing.
---------
That's it. Be sure to follow along on Twitter and on Facebook and, as always, feel free to send questions, comments, stories, and whatever else you like my way. The inbox is always open sean.joseph@outkick.com.