True Romance: Couple Busted Getting It On While Driving, Mom's Affair With Neighbor & Bad One-Night Stands

Are we currently in a summer of romance or what? We have Olympic hero Ryan Lochte going from a divorce announcement following a split from his former Playboy model wife to a new love in a kindergarten teacher by the name of Molly Gillihan.

If that turn around doesn’t warm your cold, cold heart this summer, I don’t know if anything will. Not even reports of a "summer romance" between Tom Brady and actress Sofia Vergara, who I should mention is celebrating a birthday today.

It's nice to see Tom get a win, isn’t it? Add that to the Olympic hero who thought he had found love with a beautiful model, but ended up finding out he's much happier with a teacher, and you have yourself romance of the highest order.

SIGN UP for The Daily OutKick. New Look, Same Attitude.

The best part is, we're just getting started with this week's edition of True Romance. We have an alleged stolen RV full of sex, drugs, and rock ‘n’ roll coming your way.

Wait till you get a load of these two. These two could just mess around and find themselves as my favorite love story of the entire summer. We'll see. I have them right behind my other new favorite couple, Tom and Sofia.

There's still plenty of summer left, and I'm sure another couple or two that will teach us a thing or two about romance. That's why we do this every week.

We can thank Charlize Theron for getting one-night stands some of the spotlight they deserve. But they all don’t work out as well as hers did with that anonymous 20-something. That's why we take a look at some of the worst one-night stand stories.

Romance in its purest form is better served with balance. It's not always good, and it's not always bad. Before we get into it, go follow True Romance on Twitter and Facebook.

Summer of romance rolls on in a stolen RV

I know what you're thinking. What is romantic about a stolen RV? Not much when you put it that way, but let me paint a picture for you and see if I can get you to buy in.

It's the middle of the day, and you're rolling through West Virginia in a stolen RV. You're impaired, you're horny, and you're driving down the road.

You could let the fact that you're driving stop you from having sex. You could maybe wait for a rest area or your destination, or you could let romance take the wheel, if but for a fleeting moment, and get it on right there.

That's the path these two took. Their trip down the romantic highway was unfortunately interrupted by a police officer with the Bluefield Police Department. His heart might have said "let them go," but his duty said "I must pull them over."

A couple in a stolen RV let romance take the wheel as they were busted having sex while driving. (Image Credit: Getty)

Officer R.L. Hamm says he stopped the RV, reports local media outlet Lootpress, after he spotted a naked woman straddling the male driver. They eventually pulled over in an Advance Auto parking lot.

A bystander nearby informed the officer that the two lovebirds had switched seats before he approached the vehicle. The woman, identified as Sharon Bryant, was now dressed and sitting in the driver's seat.

The man, identified as Matthew McDonnell, had ended up in the passenger seat. When the officer asked what the two were up to, Bryant reportedly gave him an honest answer. She said, "We were f***ing."

She didn’t want to hide it from anyone. Beautifully, she wanted the world to know. She was getting it on, and she didn’t care who knew it. They were then both removed from their RV of love.

Bryant reportedly appeared to be highly intoxicated and wasn’t able to be interviewed at the scene. McDonnell, on the other hand, didn’t appear to be intoxicated. He reportedly confessed that they were naked and trying to engage in sexual activity while driving. 

The fun wasn’t over just yet for this lovely couple. A K9 unit sniffed out the presence of drugs in what the police learned was a stolen RV.

A search of the vehicle found a glass pipe with residue on it, a bag of white powdery substance, a grinder with suspected marijuana, and a piece of tin foil used to smoke drugs.

Bryant failed multiple field sobriety tests and was transported to the hospital to have her blood drawn. There she told police that McDonnell had tossed some drugs during the traffic stop. Police found a broken glass pipe and Gabapentin pills.

McDonnell was charged with indecent exposure, permitting DUI, reckless driving, drug possession, possession of a stolen vehicle, and it turned out he had outstanding warrants.

Bryant was charged with DUI-drugs, indecent exposure, possession of a stolen vehicle, and drug possession. And to think this might have all been avoided had they been able to control their romantic urges.

Was it worth letting romance win and getting it on while driving a stolen RV? I'd like to think they'd both say that it was. Let the summer of romance roll on!

This Week in True Romance:

Follow True Romance on Twitter and Facebook.

My neighbor's cheating on his wife with my mom

The heart wants what the heart wants and that can be difficult for some to comprehend. Take this teenager, for example. Mom is banging the married neighbor, and it's not adding up for them.

It's not that complicated when you take a step back and look at it.

Perhaps they're just too close to the mom to realize what is unfolding before their eyes. Instead of being happy for mom, the kid wants to know if there's anything they can do about it.

As they explain, mom, 47, has been friends with the neighbor, 68, for about eight years. But more recently she's gotten "too close to him."

A teenager is concerned about his mom's affair with a married neighbor. (Image Credit: Getty)

"About a year or 2 ago I caught them kissing...twice. Yesterday I went through her phone and found them sending texts saying ‘I love you’ and talking about things they do together. I wouldn't care but he's old enough to be her father, and he's married," the concerned teenager wrote on Reddit, where they turned for answers.

The neighbor's wife is essentially bound to a chair and can barely walk to the door, so she doesn’t know about the affair. The mom helps take care of the wife and their dog.

Mom isn’t necessarily a fan of the woman and calls her a bitch and a whore, it doesn’t sound like the insults are made to the woman's face. She also has joked about moving in with the man when his wife dies.

The teenager added, "I live with my mom and grandparents, is there anything I could do about this?"

Of course, there's something that they could do about this and that's what I've already stated: be happy for mom. It's not clean and wrapped up in a box with a bow on it, but that's how it works sometimes.

Worst one-night stand experiences

Let's wrap up this portion of business, before we get to a couple of reader emails (keep those coming) by taking a look at a few of the worst one-night stand experiences folks have had from the thread properly tilted "What's the worst one night stand experience you've ever had?"

• Met a hot guy in a club. Had drinks, danced, had fun. He asks if we can "have a sleepover." I say sure. We go home. We f*ck. I fall asleep. In the morning, I wake up and all of my food in the kitchen is gone. Literally, all of it. From the fridge, from pantries, from cabinets, etc. I don't know what he put it in or where he went with it. I sleep like a log. It's a good thing I wasn't a poor college student or something. Even my condiments. It was weird. He even took dog food and milkbones.
• Hooked up with a rather unfortunate looking girl after dancing at a dive bar. For the next two weeks, she proceeded to show up at my door almost every night. After a while I had gotten back together with an ex and we were in bed when I look over to see the face of the ONS peeking through the blinds. She then began to pound on my door and shout.
• Could have been worse I guess. Woke up being spooned. Got super embarrassed with how sweaty my back was but then realized it wasn't just my back that was wet. The wet spot kept growing. Left him there in his own piss. When he finally woke up (my place) he said "oh f*ck, not again." He took the bus home with his wet undies in a little plastic bag. I Had just bought a new mattress pad from IKEA that I tried and failed at washing.
• I picked up a guy one night when all my friends and I were out celebrating a birthday. Woke up, I didn't remember his name. He came out into the living room without putting clothes on, where my friend was sleeping over on the couch. We all sat down on the couch and watched Parent Trap in our underwear. I bought him Bojangles and dropped him off at what I assumed to be his apartment. I didn't bother to get his number or anything, he didn't ask for mine.
• Got a bloody nose in the heat of the moment. I noticed before her but didn't say anything. It ended up ruining the mood. That's the first one that comes to mind. Its funny now, but at the time it was a real bone kill.
• I slept with a much older guy once, was great, left the next day etc. Fast forward a month and I started dating this guy I met on Tinder and we agreed to go visit a Zoo. His dad offers to take us there, and yea, you guessed it, I get in the car and realize it's the guy I slept with recently. So it was retrospectively a shitty one night stand because I had to break it off with a guy I liked while also making up some weird excuse (no way I'm telling him his dad did the nasty with me).

Baby Oil

- Gene in the Rock writes:

Loved your response to my last missive.  Speaking of baby oil, people just don't use it right.  Consider for a moment the ramifications of half a bottle dumped on an amorphous surface.  Like, say, a stripped waterbed.

Hmmm.  Traction: zero.  Leverage: zero.  Grip: Impossible.  Control: What's that?

Messy, sure, but I think it's about as close as most non-astronauts will ever get to screwing around in zero gee. 

SeanJo

You can't argue with that. Messing around with baby oil isn't for amateurs. You have to know exactly what you're doing to overcome all the obstacles you've correctly pointed out. Best of luck to those non-astronauts out there attempting to screw around in zero gee.

Bang At Work

- Wayne writes:

They have to provide places to breastfeed so why not banging? And it doesn't have to be solo work. Some companies have massage therapists, so they can get them to give happy endings.

SeanJo

I'm certainly not one to rain on anyone's parade, but I have a feeling it's going to be a hard sell for most companies, no matter how many Gen Zers want to bang at work.

That said, all it takes is getting one place to implement it and the rest could fall like dominoes.

---------

I hope everyone had a great Fourth of July weekend with an abundance of romance. I also hope everyone remembers that summer isn’t over and summer romances are still out there to be had. Keep your eyes open.

Go follow along on Twitter and on Facebook. Send your stories of romance or whatever else you like my way. The DMs and the inbox are always open sean.joseph@outkick.com.