Tennis Star Eugenie Bouchard Mows In Her Bikini, Kate Upton Has A Dominant Photoshoot & Joe Biden Gets Mooned
Hello, July!
This is it. The last quiet month of the year. After this, it's a full-on sprint to the finish. The content will be coming so fast and furious our heads will fall off. We won't be able to keep up. We use this month to rest, relax, regroup, and re-energize for the final five months of 2024.
PS: Fourth of July on a Thursday? Sneaky good day of the week for a holiday. You celebrate this great country on Thursday, half-ass it on Friday, and then you're right back to the weekend. If you really play it right, you can essentially make this a three-day work week.
And buddy, that's the most American way possible to celebrate her 247th birthday. Let's get AFTER it.
Welcome to a first-Monday-of-July Nightcaps – the one where we get the yard ready for a big week with Genie Bouchard, and then cool down in our swim trunks. Who hasn't, frankly?
What else? I've got Hawk Tuah girl Hailey Welch dominating Nashville and NASCAR, Kate Upton taking her photoshoot game to the next level, the Pac-12 network officially going dark, a couple bros mooning Joe Biden and an ELECTRIC interview from the Panthers' Stanley Cup parade.
Whew. What slow time, am I right? We are LOADED today.
Grab a gingersnap cookie for National Gingersnap Day, wash it back with enough bourbon to get you straight to Thursday, and settle in for a Monday 'Cap!
It's hot as hades, let's cool down with Genie Bouchard
After over two weeks, over 2,000 miles, four hotels, going on wellfare in Nantucket, a round of 89 (it's no Biden, but it'll do), one puke in my backseat (not me!), and an 8-hour sprint to the finish today – I'm back in the big, beautiful, free, red state of Florida.
Whew. Thank God. Missed this place. Do you know people in the northeast are still wearing masks in 2024? I saw more masks in the past two weeks than I've seen in four years … combined. Now, we never actually wore them in Florida, so that's a low bar, but still. It's wild to me.
There was actually a "masks suggested" sign up at a service station somewhere along the Mass Pike. True story. Wild.
Anyway, we're back. What a trip. Plenty of highs and lows along the way, as one would expect. You ever had to pull off the side of a highway because your kid is vomiting in the back out of nowhere? What a rush. That's the stuff they don't teach you in school. A character-builder, for sure.
But, we made it. We're back in the south, where it's approximately a billion degrees. When you spend two weeks in the 70s, you become sort of a wussy. Gonna have to rebuild some backbone this week.
I've also got a lawn that looks like the everglades right now. Sure the HOA loves that. Can't wait to tackle that tomorrow!
Speaking of …
What a weekend for Nashville
Welcome back to class, Genie! Been a MINUTE, but summer is heating up and that means it's time for the content to match the weather.
Genie, – or Eugenie, either-or – for those who don't follow her every move, was back in the news just last week after saying the quiet part out loud on some podcast you've probably never heard of.
"Tennis, first of all, is a great sport for that sex appeal side," the Canadian-born tennis star said on Not Alone, a Podcast with Valeria Lipovetsky.
"We’re wearing short skirts. We’re wearing tank tops. It’s fun to turn on the TV and watch that.
"Right away, I was able to get great marketing deals off the court. Being asked to be in the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit edition a few times. Exploring that path was definitely on my to-do list. It’s definitely part of who I am because I think it’s great."
Amen, sister. First you're on the cover of SI, and now you're in Nightcaps! What a leap! You are welcome.
Now, let's leave Genie in Miami and head up to Nashville, because the stars were OUT this weekend. And hey, we even get a crossover with my other award-winning column, Monday Morning Pit-Stop! What a treat:
Joe Biden gets a warm welcome!
Look, I know what you're saying, and I get it … ‘Zach, ENOUGH with Hawk Tuah girl Hailey Welch. It’s overplayed. You guys are just as bad with Caitlin Clark.'
Again, I get it. She's overstayed her welcome. BUT, the Google Algo disagrees with you, and I need to put food on the table. So, until she's completely out of the news cycle, she stays. That's just the way of the world. Don't yell at me, yell at the analytics nerds.
And, if you're really annoyed, go ahead and show me your ass! I can live with that.
Emptying the tank, Panthers girl steals my hearts & the Pac-12 goes dark
For those who missed it on Saturday – and I don't blame you – I wrote about a cart boy outside of Washington that was – and still – going mega-viral for this below tale from a round of golf with Joe Biden.
You buying it?
Honestly, I think I'm buying what this cat's selling.
I mean, what part is not believable here? Little shank job off the tee? Absolutely. Whiff? Of course. I'm surprised he even hit it at all. Snap-hook into the parking lot? Sure, makes sense.
The club toss on 13 may be the most unbelievable thing here, because there is exactly zero percent chance the Joe Biden we saw on stage the other night could toss a club. Even though our man here says it only went eight yards, I'm skeptical.
Also … the six-hour round? Get the hell off my golf course. I'd be PIPING Noodles into the group. It would be chaos.
Rapid-fire time on the way out! First up? Congrats to the Stanley Cup champion Florida Panthers!
PAnThErS fAnS aReN't ReAl HoCkEy FaNs … Yeah, OK. South Florida showed out in the rain over the weekend and dropped F-Bombs on live TV. We do just fine. Love this girl. Love this team. Love this state. So good to be back.
Next? RIP to the Pac-12, which officially went dark at 12:01 this morning:
That's how you know football season is close. July 1 is here, and that means the Longhorns are now in the SEC and the Pac-12 is now the Pac-2.
What a season we have staring us in our fat faces. Can't wait.
Finally … let's quickly empty the tank from a big weekend:
Kate Upton still has it, and she takes us into July
That last one is so tough. I think I'd go CBS (I'm an AFC guy so it's my childhood), then FOX (duh), Carrie and SNF and finally, MNF. Honestly, I'd probably put old-school CBS from like 1997-2002 above the current CBS one, but you all aren't ready for that truth-bomb. Look it up.
OK, that's it for today. Let's go have a big week.
Take us into it, Kate.
OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).
You doing yard work like Genie today? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.