NASCAR's Natalie Decker Has A 'Hot Mommy' Day, MAGA Bikini Congresswoman Bears Her Arms & Deportation Machine!
Natalie Decker throws on another red flag bikini.
Happy Fourth of July to all three of you in class today! First off – kudos to you. Seriously, this takes some serious dedication.
I'm not even technically here today. I wrote this yesterday. I wasn't even planning to take today off, but I looked at the schedule earlier this week and saw I wasn't on it for today. Imagine my surprise. What a treat!
Anyway, I tossed around the idea of just skipping class altogether, but where would we be right now if our Founding Fathers did that? I assume somewhere in disgusting England, living under a king! Instead, we get to be in America … living under a king!
At least that's what the wacky Dems are trying to tell us today. What, you haven't heard? We've got another round of ‘No Kings’ protests happening as we speak! Incredible. Anna Paulina's on it, though. Don't worry.
Anyway, welcome to a Friday Nightcaps – the one where we hit the lake with NASCAR's Natalie Decker, and go from there.
What else? I've got Anna Paulina, the best of the rest from a LOADED week of #content, and we'll end the day with Annie Agar. I assume Screencaps will have already taken her this morning, but I don't care. This holiday THIRST deserves a second look for the late-arriving crowd.
Grab you some milk punch to celebrate this great day (you'll see), and settle in for a very quick, sparsely-attended Friday 'Cap!
Anna Paulina doesn't have time for your crap, Libs
So, I did some digging on this Friday holiday (not really, I did it yesterday afternoon), and discovered that Ben Franklin loved something called "Milk Punch." True story.
Benjamin Franklin was especially unabashed about his love of "the cups." Though Grasse writes that he was careful to advise temperance, he regularly enjoyed wine and what some might argue were early iterations of craft cocktails.
His favorite, according to Alan, was milk punch, a three-ingredient brandy-based sip whose two non-alcoholic components – milk and lemon juice – washed and refined its third.
Turns out, this little drink is also a HIT in NOLA:
Obviously, this one sounds a little more palatable than whatever the hell Ben was sucking down back in the day, but it's all the same for us patriots. A drink's a drink a drink. And today, we drink.
And when we're done drinking, we take a break, say the pledge of allegiance, and then head on out with Anna Paulina Luna to mock the Libs!
What a week of #content!
That's how you celebrate this great, big, beautiful country! MAGA Bikini Congresswoman Anna Paulina Luna was ALWAYS going to lead off our Fourth of July class. Always. I'd fire myself if she didn't.
Happy Fourth of July, everyone! And Happy No Kings Day … Part II!
Now, let's get to the best #content from a short week.
NASCAR Natalie, Annie's time to shine & the world is finally catching up to us
What a week! Couple thoughts …
1. That SNL skit? My favorite one of all time. Seriously. Gets me every single year. It's probably also because, to the best of my knowledge, Nate isn't one of the insufferable Hollywood types. Yet, at least.
2. Joe and Jim on the links? What a moment. Also, what's Joe Buck wearing there? Is he rocking the T-shirt look on the course? Insane.
3. Saw a stat today that we're now closer to 2050 than 2000. How's that for a mood-killer on the Fourth of July?
4. Let's rapid-fire this holiday class and get on outta here in time to grab a quick nap since us adults will be up all night with babies who can't sleep because it sounds like they're in Iran.
First up? Nobody does the Fourth of July better than NASCAR's Natalie Decker. What a heater:
Welcome back to class, Nat! Did you see Hookstead in Wisconsin by chance? Did y'all know he's a Wisconsin fan? You learn something new every day!
Next? Before we end the day with Annie, let's quickly pat ourselves on the back, once again, for being ahead of trends.
I've been BANGING the Cracker Barrel drum for years now. Years. I've been all over them since last summer for this "new, modern look" they've started rolling out across the US of A, and you guys have been right behind me.
Well, look at who else finally started noticing …
Welcome to the show! About time the world started to notice what we've been bitching about for a year now.
To be fair, I was at a Cracker Barrel last Friday, and it was business as usual. These changes are slowly taking shape. It may be a year before your Cracker Barrel looks like one of these Gen-Z monstrosities.
(And yes, I said Gen-Z. Don't you dare blame us millennials for this. I won't stand for that.)
Anyway, it's coming. Trust me, it's coming. Get your minds right. Unless, of course, Trump snuck something into the BBB to save it? No clue. We'll find out together!
OK, that's it for today. Short class, but a class nonetheless. For the three of you who stuck it out, here's Annie on a boat to take us into the holiday weekend.
See you Monday.
OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).
Ask whatever you want, nobody's here, anyway. Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.