Ex-Astronomer HR Exec Says Hard Seltzers Fueled Viral Coldplay Scandal

Remember back in July, all we could talk about was the CEO of Astronomer cozying up with his head of human resources?

Yeah, wild times, right?

Well, I thought we were past that, but now the woman at the center of the scandal, Kristin Cabot, has decided that now — months after everyone had pretty much forgotten about the story — was the time to tell her side.

Or as wusses say, "Speak her truth."

So what happened that led to Cabot being seen snuggling up with their company's CEO, Andy Byron, on Coldplay's kiss cam?

Well, she blamed it on hard seltzers.

"I made a bad decision and had a couple of High Noons and danced and acted inappropriately with my boss. And it’s nothing. And I took accountability and I gave up my career for that. That’s the price I chose to pay," she said in an interview with The New York Times. "I want my kids to know that you can make mistakes, and you can really screw up. But you don’t have to be threatened to be killed for them."

I agree with that last part about not being threatened with death because of a mistake, but I'm skeptical about one part of this story: the High Noons being the cause.

Now, who am I to question this story? I'm just a simple man who happens to be very handsome and has observed the liquored up in their natural environment.

Careful! These could make you snuggle with your boss, or worse, enjoy Coldplay. (Getty Images)

I can understand how the booze would lower Cabot's inhibitions and lead her to dirty dance with her boss.

What I don't get is how, if she was so High Noon-ed up, how did she instantly know the second the kiss cam landed on her that she was hosed?

In my experience, someone with enough High Noons in them to make such a poor decision would usually just go, "WOOOOOOO!" like it's a bachelorette party.

That's just what I have observed in the field.

But maybe Cabot is right, and that's what happened.

Perhaps she'll tell more in the tell-all book I'm sure is being shopped as we speak.