Jennifer Aniston Goes Topless For Her 57th, Wisconsin's Caroline Harvey Is A USA Hockey Star & Olympic Condoms

A pre-Daytona 500 Hump Day? Sure, why not?! It is the Great American Race, you know. And if we know how to do one thing right in this country, it's hump. 

No clue what that means, but I'm sticking with it. 

Yes, I'm gearing up for the 500 this weekend. Big weekend. My favorite one of the year. Nothing like being in Daytona for the 500. 

I used to live right down the road from the track. I'm now two hours away after moving late last year, and I'll admit, I feel sad this week. Yes, I'm still going. No, it's not the same. Nothing beats the feeling of being around the area for 500 week. The vibes are high. The Busch Light is flowing. It's 80 degrees in Florida this week, so the sundresses are sunning. 

I can't wait to get back up there Friday. Let's roll. 

Welcome to a Hump Day Nightcaps – the one where Wisconsin's Caroline Harvey grabs America's attention with a DOMINANT performance for Team USA's hockey team. I think we have an absolute star on our hands, folks. Strap in. 

What else? I've got some serious #CONTENT out of Pam Bondi's Epstein hearing today, including Jas Crockett being told to pipe down. Surprised they let her talk for as long as they did, frankly. Lord knows I wouldn't have even given her a mic. 

Oh yeah! It's also Jennifer Aniston's birthday. She celebrated by being topless after a big shower. As one does, of course. 

We'll all sing her happy birthday to end class. There might be cake if y'all act right. We'll see. 

Grab you a peppermint patty to celebrate National Peppermint Patty Day, and settle in for a Hump Day 'Cap!

I can't do the Olympics, but I'm all in on the women's hockey team

LOVE a good peppermint patty. Criminally underrated. Anything in the peppermint/mint/coconut/chocolate arena is right in my wheelhouse. 

Mint chocolate chip ice cream? My favorite flavor. True story. How insane is that? 

Anyway, let's go ahead and get the obligatory Seinfeld clip out of the way so we can start class:

Iconic scene, obviously. Sometimes you have to take the lay-ups around here, and this one was a lay-up. Another great mint/chocolate delicacy? Those little green and brown chocolate bars they give you on the way out at Olive Garden. Best part of that restaurant. Easily. 

OK, let's officially start class.

I haven't watched a second of the Olympics. Not one. They just aren't for me. Never have been. That being said, if we have a women's hockey team that kicks Canada's ass, I will always tune in. 

Always, always, always. 

What a job by these ladies last night. What a way for Wisconsin senior Caroline Harvey to burst onto the scene. I think we have a star on our hands, folks:

Pipe down, Jasmine!

Welcome to class, Caroline! What an ass-kicking last night. What a moment for Team USA. I have no idea if these girls are going to get annoyingly political at some point during these games. I pray they don't. Please, don't. I feel like this country needs a team to rally behind right now. All you hear out of these Olympics are the snot-nosed, America-hating athletes. It's a huge turn-off. 

We need Caroline and the team to go on a run here in the worst possible way. I'll be monitoring closely. 

Speaking of hating America … it was Pam Bondi versus EVERYONE in congress today. Incredible #content from start to finish. At one point, Jerry Nadler fell asleep. A few minutes later, Jasmine Crockett was told to pipe down. 

This is how we get through the dark winter months:

Jen, Olympic condoms & really, NBC?

What a DAY for Pam and the Dems. What a battle. I don't even know who's in the wrong here. Both sides, probably. Feel like the Attorney General should have a little more composure, no? I understand the Libs are exhausting, but we have to be better than them. 

On the other hand … they are exhausting. I wouldn't make it 30 seconds before saying something that would plaster my face on the 6 p.m. news. 

Anyway, let's rapid-fire this Hump Day into a big Hump night. First up? I know I said I haven't watched the Olympics, but … was NBC serious here? What world am I living in?

Look. I feel for Savannah Guthrie and that family. I do. It's a bad situation. It's also a super fishy one, but I don't think I'm ready to publicly air those thoughts right now. 

But … we're cutting into Olympics coverage to provide a … Nancy Guthrie update? Really? It's just a bit much, right? Can we tone it down a notch? I know Savannah works at NBC. I get it. But my God. They're treating this like the OJ trial! 

The whole thing is weird. What if this was just a normal 84-year-old lady? Would we be cutting into Olympics coverage to provide an update? 

Someone had to say it. I'll fall on the sword. You're welcome!

Next? Let's stay in Milan and – more importantly – stay PROTECTED!

SunSport has been told that more than 9,700 male and female condoms have been made available in the Milan, Cortina, Bormio and Livigno clusters.

A Milan-Cortina 2026 spokesperson said: "In line with tradition during the Olympic Games, free access to condoms has historically been guaranteed to athletes in the Olympic villages as part of preventive measures.

"To date, more than 9,700 male and female condoms have been made available in various territories. Additional supplies will be provided if necessary throughout the duration of the Olympic Games."

Additional supplies, you say? Well, that sounds like a good jumping off point for our daily homework assignment! (Although I may regret it)

Take us home, Jen! Happy 57th birthday. 

OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).

What do you think the additional sex supplies are? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.