Danica Patrick Hops Back Into The GoDaddy Firesuit That Turned On America For A Decade

Remember the GoDaddy firesuit that Danica Patrick made famous back in the day because it turned on all of America for a few years?

Well, boys and girls, it's BACK, and so is Danica!

What a way to start the final Monday of April, huh? One minute, you're sitting here, trying to figure out what sort of content's going to fall into your lap during a brutally slow time of year. The next, Danica Patrick is lighting up the internet like it's 2013 all over again. 

I love it when a plan works out!

Vroom vroom:

Danica Patrick decided six years was enough to put on the Go Daddy firesuit once again. 

Danica Patrick GoDaddy commercials used to be reservation viewing 

I mean, we used to be such a great damn country. Could you IMAGINE those commercials today? It's like The Office. Would never happen. Not a chance. 

We used to pump out commercials featuring half-naked strippers promoting a domain, and now all we get is Travis Kelce shooting himself up with the eighth Pfizer shot, Danny DeVito making subs at Jimmy Johns, and a sad Sarah Mclachlan song being played to dead animals. 

Shoutout to Kristi Noem!

Anyway, we've fallen off a cliff in the commercial game here, and Danica Patrick was at the epicenter of it back in its hey-day. 

You'd literally wait all night for a GoDaddy commercial during the Super Bowl. It was better than the actual game. You never knew exactly what you were gonna get, but you knew there was a chance it was gonna involve a dressed down Danica Patrick, and that spelled fun. 

Now, we're all so damn PC in this country. So damn scared to piss off the FCC or the progressive mob on social media. So, instead of pumping out naked Danica Patrick ads, we ask the folks over at Morgan & Morgan to whip something up and call it a day. 

Sad.