Danica Patrick And Her Hot Friends Play In The Snow, What-A-Beatdown & The Democratic Party Is So Pathetic

Well, this is it. Final Hump Day of February. We're four days away from March. A new month. The month, in my opinion, that really sets the tone for the rest of the year. 

We've been hibernating for two months now. It's cold. The entire Northeast is under snow. Inexplicably, we were down in the 30s AGAIN in Florida last night and this morning. It's disgusting. There is nothing really on TV at the moment. We're in this weird lull, sports-wise, after both USA teams picked us up briefly last weekend. 

(See? I said BOTH, Libs. Enough with the fake outrage. Give us a break, please.)

But in a few short days, the calendar ramps back up. March Madness. World Baseball Classic. The Players. We spring forward in two weeks. The sun stays up longer and longer each day. All of a sudden, that Memorial Day vacation doesn't seem so far off. 

We're almost there, boys and girls. Lock it in. 

Welcome to a Hump Day Nightcaps – the one where Danica Patrick and her hot friends play in the snow before watching Trump's State of the Union. 

What else? I've got plenty of #content from last night (how embarrassing are the Dems at this point?), a Hall of Fame beatdown at a Dallas Whataburger, and how do we feel about MLB's new ABS system? 

Wait until you see the awful day this poor bastard over in Bradenton had yesterday afternoon. I think I'd just quit after a showing like this. 

OK, grab you some clam chowder for National Clam Chowder Day, and settle in for a Hump Day 'Cap!

I wish Angel Hernandez was still around for this 

Love clam chowder. Nothing bad to say about it, although the peasants who serve clam chowder with four clams in it deserve to be sent to the moon. Disgusting move. 

And also this: Manhattan clam chowder is stupid and anyone who says they prefer it over the OG is lying. Nobody prefers MCC to regular clam chowder. That's like when people say they prefer sweet potato fries over regular french fries. That's a lie. 

You're just trying to make yourself feel healthier and less fat. Don't bother. We all see right through it. Enough with the cutesy stuff. It's time to get back to basics in this country. Dance with the partner you came with. 

Whew. What a way to start Hump Day! Let's get down to it …

How are we feeling about ABS in MLB this season?

What a beating

I'm a little all over the place on this one. For starters, as y'all know, I've long called for MLB umps to be held accountable. If you can't do your job correctly, you should be punished. 

I said last year that if an ump tosses a manager for arguing balls and strikes, and it turns out the manager is right, then that ump should be immediately ejected and the manager reinstated. 

Obviously, we're not going to have that anymore in Major League Baseball. The Error of Accountability is upon us. 

(That was a good one, come on!)

That being said … I don't love that second clip. 

I grew up knowing that you don't let anything cross the plate that close to the black with two strikes. Sure, it may have technically been a ball, but … was it? Strike zones are different for every umpire, and in every game. If the ump had been calling that pitch a strike since the first inning, consistently, then it's a strike, no matter what the robot says. 

Those ticky-tack calls bother me. I feel the same way when a play at second is overturned because the runner's pinkie briefly came off the bag after he successfully stole it. I think that's silly. 

Oh well. 

I'm not sure what the right answer is. With things like this, you sort of have to be all-in, or completely out. Half measures rarely work. I do think we need to streamline the process a bit. Do we really need umpires announcing to the crowd that his crappy call is being challenged every single time? 

Feel like this could derail the whole pitch clock concept:

You see? How is ANY game supposed to flow when teams are challenging calls on the second pitch of a game? I don't know. The pitch clock was a rousing success, almost instantly. I'm not sure this one is going to be as smooth a transition. 

Anyway, I'm sure this poor schmuck wanted to bang his head against a wall around the 4th inning yesterday. Can't say I blame him. 

Speaking of …

Danica & the Dems!

It's not often I see a beatdown video on the internet that I think's worth sharing anymore. Frankly, we're all beating the piss out of each other at this point, so I'm numb to it. 

But this one caught my eye. Never seen someone lay down the hammer quite like that. I'd love to see what the build-up looked like to deserve an ass-kicking like that. Just BAM, BAM, BAM! 

Imagine getting beat with a trash can like that? Feels like you sort of just have to hang ‘em up after that. Call it a career. All the other thugs are just going to laugh at you after that. Nobody in the Thief Industry will take you seriously anymore. 

PS: I've never been to Whataburger, but I believe there are nearly 50 open here in Florida. Any good? Worth the hype? Lemme know!

OK, let's rapid-fire this Hump Day class into a big Hump night. Serious question: Don't Democrats have to be beyond embarrassed by their party at this point? 

If you're a regular Democrat – and I realize there are very few of you left – how do you wake up today and STILL vote blue? 

They're just all so childish. That's not even a strong enough word. Pathetic. They're all just so, unfathomably pathetic. When they didn't stand last night when Trump was talking about protecting AMERICANS, it was over. How could any registered Dem watch that and still be proud of their party? 

LOOK at that … counterprotest … led by Joy Reid. JOY REID. 

Look at that lunatic in a Giraffe costume! 

Hell, LOOK at the person the Dems chose to officially be the face of their rebuttal!

They're all so embarrassing. I could not imagine being a Democrat in 2026. What a miserable existence that must be. They've spent all week creating this fake controversy with our two gold medal hockey teams, and then refused to STAND last night when Trump spoke about protecting Americans. 

Hate Trump all you want. That's fine. But if you're still a Democrat today after that disgusting display last night, I don't know what else to say. 

"These people are crazy!" 

Fact check: 10000000% true. 

Take us home, Danica. 

OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).

Was last night's display the most embarrassing three hours in the history of the Democratic Party? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.