With John Daly playing this week in the PGA Championship and rekindling old memories of parties gone by, my old Internet friend Will Brinson opened up the memory bank to retell the story of Big John’s performance at the mid-August 2008 Wyndham Championship where golf’s favorite big man had himself a performance.
Daly’s history with Diet Cokes and lack of plain water on the golf course is a thing of legend and Brinson was there to watch as the Hooters-sponsored golfer went to work in Greensboro.
“Followed him for 18 holes, hawking his every move, taking meticulous notes every time he reached for his golf bag, took a bite or a sip or a puff,” Brinson tweeted Thursday as if 14 years haven’t gone by. “First few holes were just kind of eye opening. By the back nine I realized I was essentially watching someone pitch a perfect game.”
Now for the statistics as Brinson remembers them.
“The final tally of literally everything he put into his body over a full 18 holes:
“12 Diet Cokes
“6 packs of Peanut M&M’s
“0.0 ounces of water(.)”
Golf writer Robert Lusetich chimed in to say he once asked Daly why he won’t drink water. “Said he hates the taste,” Lusetich tweeted.
Daly finished the 2008 Wyndham at 6-under good for a tie for 50th place.
Brinson describes the weather combined with the cigs, diet Cokes and M&M consumption as “basically like crawling through the Sahara.”
Ahh, the Daly stories. Tiger Woods told the story this week about Daly at the 2007 PGA Championship where he asked his old pal how many waters he drank out there on a blazing hot Tulsa afternoon.
Daly told Tiger that he had 13 Diet Cokes and zero water. 264 people were treated at that tournament for heat exhaustion. John Daly wasn’t one of them.
In a 2016 interview with Graham Bensinger, Daly laid out his past with Diet Coke and food.
“I used to drink anywhere from 12 to 20 Diet Cokes a day,” Daly said. “I used to go to McDonald’s three to four times a day. To me, they always had the best fountain Diet Coke. You know I don’t drink water. I hate water. I cannot stand drinking water.”
“I used to be able to eat two Big Macs, two or three cheeseburgers, chocolate shake, regular Coke back then before I started drinking Diet Cokes in a sitting pretty easily,” Daly recalled.
It’s been estimated that John Daly, in his prime, would consume 515 gallons of Diet Coke each year.
In a 2021 interview, golfer Pat Perez told the “Fore The People” podcast that Daly once suffered a stroke at Perez’s house while partying and this one will forever be told in the great life stories of a guy who has lived life to the fullest.
“He had a stroke while staying at my house. “I couldn’t find him, and I’d been looking for this mother f–ker for about 45 minutes,” Perez explained. Then I go around the house a couple of times till I finally see him around the f–king corner, at which point I’m like, ‘John, where the hell are you?'”
The story goes that Perez finds his buddy, who says, “Oh, bubba, I’m having a f–king stroke,” with a cig in his mouth.
“I call the ambulance, and they arrive with his caddie, Peter, and the paramedics,” Perez continues.
“I call the ambulance, and they arrive with the paramedics. Peter says, ‘No, no, [Daly] just wants a f–king blowjob.'”
The paramedics tell Peter to get out of the way so they can save Daly’s life, but that’s not the end of the story. Perez says Daly is loaded into the ambulance and Peter the Caddie gets into the driver’s seat and drives the ambulance to the hospital where Peter allegedly asks for a smoking room.
“I think to myself, ‘Peter, are you folks mentally ill, or am I missing something here?’” Perez remembers. “I return home, wake up, and receive a phone call from John, who informs me that I am required to pick them up from the hospital. “It was like 10:30 a.m., but it was only like six hours later.”
Perez goes to the hospital to get Daly who gets into the car and says, “Bubba, I need a f–king drink.”
Pat also claims he saw Daly drink 72 beers in an afternoon at Hooters.
That should be enough JD to get you through a Friday at work. Cheers.