Would you pick up a half-eaten pizza off a porch for dinner?
I’ve seen some absurd moments on the local Buy Nothing Facebook page, but I’ve never seen anything like what crossed my timeline last night as I sat in the man cave enjoying the MLB playoffs.
An absolute savage suburbanite offered up this half-eaten pizza and women lined up with their fake OMG, I’ve been wanting to try that place stories and how they’d love to be the lucky recipient of a half-eaten pizza.
For those of you not familiar with a Buy Nothing Facebook page, we’re not talking about a place where the homeless and dirt poor hangout hoping to score a half-eaten pizza. We’re talking about a place where suburbanites post a door stopper — again, it’s for free — and 100 women, who’ve set alerts on their Androids, pile in competing with sob stories for how they’ve always been wanting a door stopper like the imaginary door stopper I just made up.
It’s an absurd scene and yet I can’t stop consuming it.
Remember, if you see something absurd, take a screenshot. I want to see it.
Speaking of pizza, let’s check in with the Mike T. & Cindy T. Italy trip
They’ve been enjoying the patio life. Wine life. Thee life.
• Mike T. writes:
That my brother is living the patio life!
Mike T. also thought you guys would appreciate this laundry and stacked wood combo. Mike T. is dialed in right now with the content. It’s a constant stream of my consciousness. It’s like Tom Brady throwing passes to Gronk. My brain is throwing Mike T. and Cindy T. ideas and they’re executing.
And this is an Italian unisex bathroom:
Do Hard Things – Middle Finger to Cancer
• Trent T., who is a long-time OutKick reader going back at least to Christmas 2016 when he was buying DPAP shirts, shares this story about his life and overcoming obstacles:
Doing Hard Things is what makes life worth living. In 2016 I had a special thing taken from me. My right middle finger. As a newly wed I was diagnosed with a sarcoma(cancerous tumor) in my right hand and the remedy ultimately was losing my ability to give a double mid solute.
Beating cancer is when the Do Hard Things portion of my journey was just getting started. I was lucky enough to have the support of family and friends to get a long used chemo treatment only available in Europe, suggested by a doctor at Sloan Kettering in NYC, that shrunk the sarcoma enough that I didn’t lose my entire hand. It was then my mission to pay that forward.
I incorporated Middle Finger to Cancer in May 2017 and made it through the rigorous 501(c)(3) approval process by the end of 2017. We have now hosted 5 fund raising golf tournaments in Kansas City, MO and 2 in Rochester, NY. Middle Finger to Cancer has raised over $150,000 to support cancer patients and give access to specialized treatments.
Would love for the screencaps nation to know that giving the middle finger to cancer is acceptable and encouraged. Find details about Middle Finger to Cancer at MF2C.ORG
I may be on the older side of millennial with my 40th birthday coming next year but encourage all to Do Hard Things!
• Adam D. shows us what’s going on in Manhattan, Kansas:
• Brett G. writes:
Love your column and everything that you and the rest of Outkick are doing! I’m constantly refreshing the website at work to see if there’s anything I haven’t read yet.
I had to email you regarding the Halloween decorations. I live in St. Joseph, Missouri, home of the Pony Express and this house did it right! They have those giant ass skeletons and horse skeletons! I’ve never seen those anywhere. Just thought you would enjoy.
Oh, and Paige is incredible! I could watch her throw out the first pitch at every game and it would never get old.
Last thing, tattoos. I have both shoulders, my chest, rib cages, inside of my arms and half my back all covered. The majority of which are inspired by Stephen King’s The Dark Tower. I love the look and I actually enjoy the pain of getting them! I wear a shirt and tie everyday as a personal banker and I love my customers’ reactions when they find out how many I have. If I had more time and money, I would be covered. As far as meaning, some certainly do. But mainly I just love how they look. They aren’t for everyone but they are for me.
Keep it to Joe!
Gun advice for Geoff R. in Knoxville
I wish Geoff good luck going through all the emails I forwarded last night. Hopefully, he wasn’t trying to enjoy a good book because there were probably 10k words in those emails.
But, here’s the deal with the beauty of Screencaps right now, Geoff just received incredible advice from people who have zero intention of steering him in the wrong direction. The emails were from ex-military and current police officers. Geoff received emails from VPs and the blue-collar community.
Like Mike T. and Cindy T. being dialed in right now, you guys are hitting on all cylinders. Incredible job helping out Geoff.
• Brent P. writes:
Just got around to the screencaps this morning and I am delighted to hear I am not the only one to count the cinder blocks. I had Hildee at about 5’2” when you account for about an ½ inch of cement between the blocks. I use backdrops to all the time to determine size of things in pictures.
• Dan from Hawaii writes:
First-time emailer, long-time reader. I am here to settle the Hildeee debate. I’ve been known as the guy who likes to drink shots out of belly buttons. I also apply this method to dimples on the small of a woman’s back, I get that not all women have them. Unfortunately, I couldn’t see myself taking one off of her belly button. I find it to be a turnoff.
If it’s any consolation to Hildeee, I would definitely, do a shot off of her back though.
This would be a great poll question for your readers. How many guys would be willing to drink a shot out of hers?
Tipping and rounding up trend
• Jason in Kalamazoo writes:
Sean C. in Granger makes points I agree with. My tips go to those that perform tasks I cannot do for myself i.e., serving food from a kitchen to a table where I am seated. Pouring a draft from behind a bar and delivering to the stool where I am seated. “Dancing” on my lap in a backroom, where I am seated…..
The tipping question I have is how much (if anything) do you give to those who set their own rates?? My housekeeper charges $25/hr and I pay her the exact amount based on the time she’s there. Should I be throwing a couple extra dollars in? I feel like if she wanted more, she could simply charge $30/hr and I would gladly pay it. This is a discussion I have with Mrs. Procurement Analyst all the time.
• Jon S. writes:
I can’t speak for all restaurants of course, but at Taco Bell “rounding up” isn’t for tipping, but it is a donation to the Taco Bell Foundation. That foundation funds scholarships and other youth programs.
Am not endorsing the Foundation or anything (its financials are posted online for anyone who wants to investigate) and I usually do not round up because I have charities that I choose to directly support, but I would not want anyone thinking that every request to “round up” is just an attempt to put money in the Company’s coffers.
Uh, that doesn’t look safe
• Martin from Omaha writes:
I saw this car on two different occasions about a month apart at the local Menards here in CB, Iowa. If you look close the trash seems to be different. WTF!!!
And that should do it this morning. You have plenty of content to think about. You have a half-eaten pizza to virtually consume. It’s Thursday. The weekend is here. You’re putting together golf plans because it’s going to be 78 on Sunday.
Get those Halloween costumes together. Let’s do it big this year.
Go out there and attack the day.