Thursday Night Mowing League: The Weekend Is Officially Wide Open!

TNML Commissioner’s Report:

Let me say it again: There's not a week that goes by where I don't think...this is the week when this whole TNML fizzles out. Then I look at the tweets, the texts, the messages where I hear TNML was a hot topic at a guy's night out at the bar, the emails, the Slack messages, the Linkedin messages, the Facebook posts, the IG DMs, etc., etc.

You're right, I need to eliminate that loser thought process from my thought process. I need to remember that this is by far the fastest growing and LARGEST mowing league in the United States.

Moving along...

I can't tell you guys how much I love when John Deere's social media team 'Likes' a tweet you guys have sent in featuring the TNML sticker right there on your Deere rides. Two iconic brands building synergy brings a tear to my eye.

Moving along...

Here's the scene this week just off the patio at my house. You can see the new AC unit, the pool cover I need to put away, the rest of the dead weeping cherry that needs to be dropped, and the columbine that is in full bloom and driving the bees crazy. Shoutout to my wife who planted nearly all of the flowers this year.

Mulch is coming soon.

That's all I have this week. It's been a long one and now it's time to cruise into Friday night. Have a great weekend.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

• Brian B. in Powder Springs, GA writes:

Thanks for the screencaps and TNML. A great diversion from the rest of the internet and social media. I genuinely look forward to seeing what the rest of the country is doing and how generally similar most of us are.   

When mowing yesterday I had a thought. I am curious to know who cuts the outside edge first or last. I almost always do it first but I am wondering if I am in the minority on this. 

As for doing hard things - sometimes the hard thing is forced on you outside of your control. My first wife passed away due to cancer almost 9 years ago. Being a single dad to two girls who at the time were in elementary school was not easy but it made me a better dad and person. While it was difficult for me it has been tough for the girls. One is graduating from high school and still misses her mom. I did marry again 5 years ago. My wife had 2 younger daughters. All four girls have blended very well and you would not know that they are stepsisters. My wife has been awesome dealing with everything. 

The crazy part is that when my first wife had her first surgery for her cancer my now wife discharged her from the hospital. We did not know this until after we were married. Even though we were both going through a hard time 6 years later we can look back and see the blessing out of that time. 

When your kids are in elementary school, time goes slow. Middle school is rough. High school is quick. Next thing you know your kid is graduating and moving away to college. I see our job is to launch our kids but that doesn't make it any easier! 

New products….BUY! BUY! BUY!

TNML Reports:

• Candler B. in Duluth, GA writes:

Joe- First off, I'd like to explain my absence from sending in reports in the first month or so of the season. I'm a teacher and coach, and April and May always prove to be ridiculously busy months. The good news is that we got out of school yesterday for the summer. (I have no idea why we're out so early, but these are the types of things that you don't ask questions about.) I'm now fully focused and ready to fulfill my TMNL beat reporter duties from the North Atlanta suburbs if you'll have me back. 

This week we're coming to you from Peachtree Corners, GA (sounds like a fake city, I know, but it's real) and highlighting the work of my buddy Connor. Now, Connor and I have a unique relationship because, when I first met him, he was a squirrely but likable student that I taught in my 7th grade history class. I later coached him in high school football when he was an undersized and scrappy safety and wide receiver who earned a starting spot his senior year on a team that made it to the final four in the state playoffs. (The guy is a winner!) We've now come full circle because this past year Connor coached my boys in middle school football and next year will be their 8th grade history teacher- pretty cool

Anyway, Connor is getting the shout out today not just for him, but also for all of our millennial league members. Sometimes the millennials get a bad rap from Gen Xers and baby boomers for just wanting to post pictures of themselves on the interwebz all day and for wanting to get promoted without doing any work. I guess that's probably true of some, but not Connor and those like him. This guy is getting it done!  He's out there investing in the yutes (My Cousin Vinny) of America every day, he recently won the Lacrosse Coach of the Year for the state of Georgia, he's having a baby with his wife Gammy (not her real name but the nickname I gave her when I also taught her in 7th grade history class) in the fall, and he's making time to lay down some stripes on a Thursday night! And on top of all of that, the guy's mustache is so think it would make Tom Selleck blush. (By the way, he wanted to send in just a pic of his mower, but I told him Gammy had to take a picture of him in action to "make the report come to life.") 

So let's celebrate Connor and all of our younger league members this weekend when we're admiring our freshly cut lawns and having fun in this beautiful spring weather since our Saturday is wide open. What a time to be alive! America, baby!

####

Say it louder, Candler!

SATURDAY IS WIDE OPEN. I love it. Print it on a shirt.

There are TNML emailers and then there's Candler and a select few who never cease to amaze me with the work they put in to be creative and bring a message to this insane league we developed. If you just scrolled past Candler's email, STOP, scroll up and read it.

READ IT!

• Ryan S. in NW Ohio writes:

Good Evening Commish,

Well thankfully the yard dried out just in time for my great after work Thursday cut. Most of you probably don’t know, but I’ve been a big advocate of the 4” cut for some time now, but tonight, I raised that deck more. I went for it, the rarely seen 4.5” cut and I’m totally diggin it.

Now, my neighbor (Jim V), which I’ve never decided if we have a friendly lawn competition; he mows, I mow, I mow, he mows. Can’t figure it out, but it’s all good, he’s got a nice lawn. So we talked the other day about this great league and I talked to him about joining, his response, “I’m good”. But I’ve noticed, he’s mowed the last two Thursday’s. I think he secretly wants to be a part of the league. *His lawn is the second pic. I’m still working on him.

To my weapon, yes, that’s a badminton racquet. Same neighbor introduced me to BEE-minton. Much like Joe, I have plenty of bees, carpenter bees. So, I hang out now on my front porch and crush them with the racquet, it’s great fun, especially when they get stuck between the strings. Finished the night with my favorite Oberon.

####

I know what Ryan is up against with his neighbor. I've had a similar situation with my own neighbors who laugh at TNML and then wouldn't you know it they start mowing on Thursday night knowing full well they just opened up their weekend.

They're now tasting freedom on Saturday. IT'S WIDE OPEN.

BTW, hope the bee lovers are happy. Ryan's yard is a mess too. Damn bees are everywhere.

• What a setting from Doug J. who writes:

The stripes are down, the stripes are down! Finally got on track and I am officially part of the 2022 TNML. I am ready for a nice weekend of watching my 13 year old play softball and getting some projects done around the house. Happy to have my yards mowing schedule finally dialed in.

• Glenn W. in central Texas writes:

Been forever since we(wife) got in a legit TNML. Real life forbids it most weeks. Had last Thursday on the must list then a convict escaped a prison bus by the house, on you know it, Thursday. After a week of “he’s still on the loose “” , hell with it. Grass ain’t cutting itself. Love screencaps. Only read it for the articles*. The real topics , from real people, make my day. Keep up the good work Joe.

• Keith M's daughter is busy most Thursdays running her mowing business!

• Beau in Toledo does TNML as a side job. Of course he mowed last night. The weather was perfect.

Beau writes:

It's Thursday... Grass deserves to get cut... and because it's not Fight Club, We Proudly Talk About Thursday Night Mowing League, and We have the Stripes and Clippings to prove it.

• Tim G. in NW OH writes:

Got my neighbor to play with us this week! Still very wet in NW Ohio. Had a 5” cut with my @exmark, then Mich Ultras by his pond. A beautiful evening!

• Old TNML vet PB writes:

Beautiful evening in Eastern PA…..and a great cut…Hats off to Scott’s, Honda, Stihl, Coors Light, cigarpage.com and TNML for a great early season performance!!!

And #FJB

• Sean C. in Granger, IN writes:

After I finished my mow tonight, I took my dogs for a walk. I noticed a LOT of people who had mowed or were still mowing. Are they secret members of the TNML, or are they just taking advantage of a perfect evening before potential thunderstorms this weekend? Time will tell.

But I will say this…..as a kid growing up, I never thought I’d be a guy who judged others lawn care. As an adult (more specifically a home owner), even before the TNML was established, I definitely judged. But since the inception of the TNML, I think I’ve been a more harsh judge. Seeing this community that has been created, and the care and attention that our group has taken in our yards, I can’t help but wonder about this group of people who just don’t seem to care. I’m not even talking about the people who hire a lawn service. They are just morally bankrupt as far as I’m concerned. And don’t get me wrong, 90% of my neighborhood does a bang up job keeping their lawn in tremendous shape. But there are some people that just don’t care. Grass growing 2-3” onto the sidewalk from lack of edging. Fences un-trimmed. A yard full of dandelions! I just shake my head every time I walk by one of these houses and thank God that I don’t live within 3 houses of these people…..if we can even call them people.

Anyway, I digress. Last year there were some people that dealt with some diseased grass. I was one of them. I don’t know if it was bugs or something else. But I had weird brown spots that weren’t from dog pee. I dug out the bad grass and re-seeded late in the year last year. I was hoping it wasn’t too late. And all winter it was hard to tell. But now that we’re 4+ weeks into the growing season, I can see that I’m back in business. I was concerned early on, but it looks like things worked out. Simple Scott’s Rapid Grass. I seeded it like crazy. And it’s almost impossible to tell where the dead spots were.

Looking forward to another great, mow-free weekend!

• Dustin M. in Bowling Green, OH writes:

Heard about TNML from a friend and immediately knew it would be something I wanted to get involved with. I just spent a week away from home on some military training so my yard calling my name.

• Colin in Mokena, IL writes:

Screencaps continues to knock it out of the park for me every day. Much appreciated. Feels good reading about passing the torch to the kids to mow at a young age.

Felt really good today when my youngest just back from his 1st year at Iowa knocked out the yard. Nice cool night to catch up with some cold ones.

Written by
Joe Kinsey is the Senior Director of Content of OutKick and the editor of the Morning Screencaps column that examines a variety of stories taking place in real America. Kinsey is also the founder of OutKick’s Thursday Night Mowing League, America’s largest virtual mowing league. Kinsey graduated from University of Toledo.