Stone-Skipping Scandal Rocks Scotland As Competitors Disqualified For Juiced Rocks

There are few things I love as much as a niche sport cheating scandal, and we've got a doozy from the world of stone-skipping.

We've had some wild niche sport cheating incidents over the years, like people accused of sticking weights in fish and chess players accused of sticking vibrators… well…

But now, we've got allegations of stone-skipping cheating, which is something I didn't realize was even possible. 

I thought the sport worked thusly: Skip Stone. Count Skips. Wash.. Rinse. Repeat.

But apparently, it can be done, which has led to the disqualifications of several competitors at this year's World Stone Skimming Championships in Scotland.

"Stone Skimming" is just stone-skipping, by the way. Sort of like how fries are "chips," chips are "crisps," and "color" gets a superfluous U.

According to UPI, one of the rules of the competition is that competitors can only throw natural slate stones found on the island where the event takes place, known as Easdale Island.

However, this year, some competitors were seen winging stones that appeared to have been machined, and featured notches to help with throwing.

A competitor wings a stone (a legal one) at the World Stone Skimming Championships on Scotland's Easdale Island.  (Photo by Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images)

According to Daily Mail, the event's "Toss Master," Kyle Matthews, was not going to stand for this.

"What started as murmurings grew larger and came to my attention," Matthews said. "I got calls from concerned competitors. They were worried people might think that’s how things are done here. I contacted the individuals in question who admitted their transgressions and I had to disqualify them.

"We accept that’s the end of the matter," he continued. "To give them their credit, they admitted their transgressions, deeply apologized for bringing the sport into disrepute, and accepted disqualification."

Wow, they nearly tarnished the image of the entire sport. This was stone-skipping's Steroid Era or Malice at the Palace.

If you get called out for using juiced stone-skipping stones, just cop to it.

I feel like most people would deny the allegations and claim they had been framed. If that didn't work, they'd start talking about how this was all a result of their Instagram getting hacked before they finally initiated a multi-year courtroom battle over their disqualification.

No, just cop to it and move on. Come back next year with legal stones.