Looking For Ohio State vs. Texas Tickets? Have You Considered Selling A Kidney?

Hope you weren't planning on getting your kids Christmas gifts this year.

Published•Updated

The annual preseason coaches poll for college football dropped earlier Monday, and among all the teams with arguments to be moved up and down, the consensus top two teams appear to be Texas and Ohio State.

I'm sure the fact that they play each other in the opener has nothing to do with their ranking at all, but regardless, this sets up a historic No. 1 versus N. 2 matchup in the first week of the season that has never been seen before.

With the Longhorns and Buckeyes set to do battle as the top two teams in the country, tickets have, naturally, been in high demand.

Let's check in on how much they're asking for a decent seat in the Horseshoe for this one.

Dear Lord in Heaven above!

No wonder these kids are raking their teams' boosters over the coals for every cent they can get. Look at the price of these bad boys!

Now look, Kyle Umlang is, admittedly, a bit of a provocateur on social media, so I was skeptical at first that he might have been faking or photoshopping these prices.

But I checked on StubHub for seats in a similar section just before writing this, and it turns out they are around the same price, so Mr. Umlang isn't fibbing this time around.

I'll be honest, college football is my favorite sport. But you will NEVER catch me shelling out five grand to see my team or any other team play a regular-season game.

If the Gators ever somehow (miraculously) host a home playoff game before I die, I might consider dipping into the 401k to see it live, but don't count on it.

For roughly 50 times less money, I can go to a sports bar on the beach in Fort Lauderdale, order some wings and a couple of drinks, and watch this game along with five others with a view of the Atlantic Ocean.

I am not saying any of you should do the same.

After all, there is nothing quite like a home college football environment.

But maybe wait until these prices drop or grab some from a scalper on game day.

God forbid these poor college kids not be able to pay for their Lambos and G-Wagons, though.

Tags
Written by

Austin Perry is a writer for OutKick and a born and bred Florida Man. He loves his teams (Gators, Panthers, Dolphins, Marlins, Heat, in that order) but never misses an opportunity to self-deprecatingly dunk on any one of them. A self-proclaimed "boomer in a millennial's body," Perry writes about sports, pop-culture, and politics through the cynical lens of a man born 30 years too late. He loves 80's metal, The Sopranos, and is currently taking any and all chicken parm recs.