Cornell Football Attempts To Out-Nerd Harvard, Punts On Third Down

The future doctors and lawyers masquerading as college football players for Cornell and Harvard gave us one to remember on Friday night. Or at least one nerdy first quarter play.

In the opening quarter, winless Cornell faced a 3rd-and-25 from their own 20-yard line. Now, most would assume this is where you dial up something down the field. Put the ball in the air. Get as close to the sticks as possible. Instead, Cornell opted for trickery…

Statue of Liberty? Nope.

Fumblerooski? Negative.

Reverse? Nah.

They punted.

On third down.

Yep. Cornell quarterback Garrett Bass-Sulpizio received the snap from the shotgun, took a half-step, then placed boot-to-ball. 34-yards later, the pigskin sat at the Harvard 46.

It was as clear a vote of confidence for the quarterback and skill players as you’ll ever see from Cornell’s head coach and OC.

If you didn’t know any better, you’d think you were watching Tuesday night MACtion, not a couple of Ivy Leagues nerding out. 

Pat McAfee’s about to write these geeks a big ol’ check for the NIL fund.

Cornell Accumulated Only 193 Total Yards Of Offense

Can’t trust these Ivy League guys. One minute they’re punting on third down, the next, they’re creating businesses that allow wives to have everything they’ve ever dreamed of delivered to their doorstep within two days, simultaneously beating the hell out of your debit card. 

Or maybe even selling paper in Scranton, Pennsylvania, while moonlighting with Here Comes Treble.

Either way, can’t trust ‘em.

And that punt, by the way, didn’t do much to move the needle. Despite backing up the Crimson in a way-too-early battle for field position, Cornell was unable to score in the first quarter. … Or in the second. 

They did eventually find the end zone in the third quarter and added a field goal in the final frame. But it was far from enough to keep things close. Harvard rolled 34-10 to improve to 4-0. 

For Big Red, there is a bright side. On an early third down, they discovered they were rostering a dual-threat quarterback. 

Follow along on X @OhioAF or email me: anthony.farris@outkick.com