Woke Santa Tells Crying Kids ‘No Toy Guns’

2020, the year even Santa went woke and bowed to the mob.

In a video posted online, a social justice Santa refused to let a little boy ask for a Nerf gun. “No, no guns,” the mall Santa told the crying boy. His mother, likely confused with the outrage, clarified that her son was asking for a “Nerf” gun. The big guy still refused:

Got that? You can’t take your kids to sit across the table from Santa’s lap without a politically-driven, anti-gun lecture.

It is unclear when Nerf guns became banned, but perhaps it was only a matter of time. You have to now wonder what other toys are a no-go from the Santas?

By the way, what are the odds this miserable dressed-up Santa got shot in the eye, crushed, and dunked on in a Nerf gun war during his childhood?

Nerf guns are great. Put them on your Christmas list.

“You’ll still get it,” the cool mom told the crying boy seconds removed from finding out toy guns have been canceled.

Written by Dallas Jackson


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  1. What a loser Santa. Woke Santas are just like all other woke people: miserable people who don’t have fun, or don’t want anyone else to have fun.
    Bad news Santa: I already bought my grandson a Nerf gun. He will love it.

  2. Dear Woke Lame-Ass Santa,

    My name is Little Johnny. I am 13 years old. I am hoping to qualify for my enhanced carry license. I am getting really good at the shooting range with my Mom and Dad, we go twice a week.

    Can you please bring me a 9mm Glock 19? Gen5? Maybe with a nice tricked out fast-access holster?

    Oh and I’d really like a Glock G26, too, for ankle carry.

    I will leave you some extra milk and cookies, just look for the nice house with our LifeTime NRA sticker on my dad’s truck.

    Thank you and Merry Christmas!!

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