Penn State Diversity & Inclusion Team Has Spoken, Changes Coming

By now you know when a diversity and inclusion team makes a ruling, some sort of mind-numbing change is on the way. Hasbro’s diversity and inclusion team went after its very own Monopoly in an attempt to modernize the board game to reflect modern society. Those changes included eliminating beauty contests & other unwoke (is that a word?) from the Community Chest Cards and replacing them with ‘shop local’ and ‘rescue a puppy’ cards.

Now Penn State University is getting in on the absurdity via its woke faculty senate which announced earlier this month that it was going to introduce some diversity & inclusion to the school system’s campuses.

Those changes, outlined in an April PSU faculty senate report, include:

  1. Move away from the use of gendered pronouns when referring to students, faculty, staff, and guests in course descriptions and degree program descriptions.
    1. Replace he/him/his and she/her/hers with they/them/theirs or use non-gendered terms such as student, faculty member, staff member, etc.
  2. Move away from the use of academic grouping titles that stem from a primarily male-centric academic history in course descriptions and degree program descriptions.
    1. Replace freshman/sophomore/junior/senior with first-year (1st-year), second-year (2nd-year), third-year (3rd-year), fourth-year (4th-year), and beyond.
      1. Note: some programs include additional undergraduate years, or Integrated Undergraduate-Graduate programs (IUG), that run beyond the typical timeframe, resulting in the nickname ‘super-senior’. This would be replaced with fifth-year (5th-year), and beyond, as needed.
    2. Concerns have been raised that numbering years beyond the fourth (4th) would perhaps negatively reflect on students who, for various reasons, are taking longer to complete their (typically) four-year programs, and are also referred to as ‘super-seniors’.  In this case, the term does often carry a slightly negative connotation.
      1. Students in such situations beyond the fourth (4th) year could instead be referred to as ‘advanced-standing’ students.
    3. Replace ‘underclassmen’ and ‘upperclassmen’ with ‘lower division’ and ‘upper division’.

The resolution that was passed stated that “Terms such as ‘freshman’ are decidedly male-specific, while terms such as ‘upperclassmen’ can be interpreted as both sexist and classist.

And the PSU faulty senate will not stand for it, dammit! Someone has to stand up to all this sexism and classism, and gosh darn it, a bunch of tenured faculty will die on a hill for inclusion and diversity.

According to, 88.75% of students at Penn State approved the changes and will now live in a much more inclusive collegiate world that no longer demeans students like the old days. This should make everything so much better. That said, ‘super-seniors’ seems to be kinda insulting because seniors typically means old people. I smell ageism, Penn State. Fix it!

Written by Joe Kinsey

I'm an Ohio guy, born in Dayton, who roots for Ohio State and can handle you guys destroying the Buckeyes, Urban Meyer and everything associated with Columbus.


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  1. Hi, my name is Connie, but you can call me Connie. I am a 6th year freshmen here at Them State. I did not learn anything of value in the first 6 years here at the Dummie Farm. I don’t intend to learn anything in the next 6 years either. Making my 15 year journey here at Them State a total waste of my birther persons time and money. I did learn math is racist and 3 out of 2 people can’t do it. My future goals are to become a professional social justice moocher and destroy whatever is good and decent in America. I would like to thank the LGBTQRSXYZ inclusivity eunuchs for their leadership in all matters that have no direction, no purpose, and no apparent connection with reality. If I have learnt one thing here at Them State, it is this. Lubricate, Lubricate, Lubricate

    • When sanity returns, and it will, I think on orientation day at Happy Valley aka Stinky Crack Canyon. On orientation day the social justice weirdos can pre-order their penitentiary number. That in itself will save a lot of time and money on incarceration day. Even numbers on the right, odd numbers on the left, really odd numbers right down the middle, and the extremely odd go directly to the showers for soap inventory duty. I don’t even wanna know what it takes to be considered “extremely odd” in this circus world of depravity. Remember children. Lubricate, Lubricate, Lubricate. We live in a great country, there is a future for everyone.
      Connie, but you can call me Connie.

    • 01001010 01101001 01101101 (Jim) 01010010 01101111 01100010 01100010 00001010 (Robb)

      I do think your suggestion is very insightful and I support it. Upon further discussion with my all woman, all the time, every day in every way bride. We have solved the pronoun conundrum. Anytime, we are on a campus of “higher larnin” we will address everyone as “Dipshit”. For instance,
      I saw Dean Dipshit in Professors Dipshit’s class, his Associate Dipshit was teaching all the Dipshits how to become credentialed Dipshits.

      Your idea remains the best idea. Mine is just more emotionally satisfying.
      Connie, but you can call me Connie.

  2. “terms such as ‘upperclassmen’ can be interpreted as both sexist and classist.” Just to show how stupid these people are, they say upperclassmen is classist but upper division isn’t? Do they really understand what a class is? Hint, it isn’t classist for having the word class in it, it would be classist for separating upper from lower!

    • Thank you. I am so relieved to have that clarified. As for the entire discussion and its value in today’s world, maybe just maybe, our brilliant students upper, lower, over and under, may just like to cure cancer, stop war, reduce poverty, build bridges, fly airplanes, learn navigation skills. Engineering, math, medical knowledge and skills are now, and will always be a positive contribution to society. I really don’t care what color underwear these morons wear, but I would remind them they are there to learn useful skills, not to magnify there already twisted view of the world.

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