Party Pooper – Homeless Man Breaks One Off In NYC Subway

And you think your job stinks… A New York City subway worker had a crappy day, thanks in large part to a homeless man who helped himself to the plumbing – which doubled as a mop bucket. Let’s go to the tape, shall we?

NOW YOURE IN NEWWWW YORRRRK! Concrete jungle where hobos will shit in your mop bucket if you take your eyes off it for literally like 2 secondsssss! There’s nothing you can’t doooo! pic.twitter.com/ZY8Hn30Y0U

— KFC (@KFCBarstool) July 4, 2021

Clearly, the pooper wasn’t concerned with privacy. He let loose in front of more than a dozen subway travelers without a care in the world. This is the one time when wearing a mask is not only acceptable, but encouraged.

Plenty of questions remain: Why did he choose that particular bucket? Was it possibly equipped with a bidet? Was there no access to public restrooms? Did the mop bucket and freshly cleaned floor provide a cleaner atmosphere for the man to move his bowels than the subway’s actual restrooms? Was any thought given to wiping (it appears not)? Maybe most importantly, what was the subway employee thinking when he angrily approached Deuce Bigalow mid-movement? Do you really want to throw fists with someone who does his business in a mop bucket in front of an audience?

After analyzing the tape, the homeless man deserves some credit. It’s clear he’s motivated. He won’t be stopped. Like a hobbled Willis Reed in the same city some 50 years earlier, this man willed his way to the finish line. At one point, he was even rudely interrupted. He quickly popped up from the porcelain throne, declared his intentions and went back to finish the job. That’s the type of work ethic this country is missing. And for that, we give the pooper props.