Paige Spiranac Wants To Help You Losers Break 100 On The Golf Course

Paige Spiranac wants the golf losers who can't break 100 (not me, I typically break 100 when I'm not drinking) to remember one thing this summer -- control, control, control!

Yes, Paige understands you're loaded up with alpha male who wants to mash drives, challenge bunkers, crush beers and shape irons into greens, but you actually suck and you'll end up taking penalty shots and shoot a 103.

The World's No. 1 Ranked Golf Influencer wants to break you of this behavior. In her newest YouTube video, Spiranac wants you to hit a drive 200 yards or farther with a slower backswing and faster follow-thru. She wants you to club up instead of taking big hacking swings which lead to open club faces and hit two to three greens in regulation per round.

Seems simple enough, right, losers?

"More club, swing easier," Paigeviews advises. "I want you to really control your game, control your swing. You're going to find the center of the club face easier when you do that."

And choke down. Put the ball in the middle of your stance for a boring lower-ball flight.

Again, control the club.

Stop thinking you're going to hit an approach shot two feet from the hole.

Control, control, control!

This is great and all, but Paige is ignoring the elephant in the room -- booze! What's Paige's solution for duffing a wedge after uncorking a bomb -- post Fireball shots with the boys -- and leaving yourself 75 yards in. We've all been there. You're absolutely s--tfaced on a guys' trip.

The music is pumping. You're closing in on breaking 100 and then comes the dreaded 75-yard wedge shot that is notoriously duffed once about 20 yards forward and then duffed again because you're raging over the first duff.

Let's face it, this is the hardest golf shot in drunken golf.

Your boys are laughing their asses off at you for multiple duffs after that beautiful drive but now you're facing down a double after getting on in four shots.

Paige, we really need to find a solution to the doubles that turn into triples and kill a round.

I've been told by golf experts to take out a 6 or 7 and use a putting stroke to keep the ball low and pop it onto the green just so you don't duff the wedge after the Yuengling Lights start doing the talking.

"3s and 4 are great. 5 is par. Try not to run up much more than that," an A-level golfer told me recently.

It makes sense until the Fireballs start to add up.

The haters will say to stop drinking while playing golf or accept that you're a 100 golfer (let's remember, all of us should be playing with full integrity and counting every shot) and move on with life.

But I feel like there are little things 100-level players who party can do to keep that number around 97 or 98.

My plan this summer is to ignore the wedge from locations where a 6-iron can do the job, just get the first putt as close enough to give myself a great opportunity at a two-putt and try to control, control, control.

Thanks, Paige.