Northwestern Figure Skater Alina Fernandez Makes Her Debut, Jeffrey Dahmer Enjoys Another Browns Meltdown & AB Steals Gisele

And just like that, MY Bengals aren’t a lost cause this season

My big takeaway this week has to be the general chaos of the NFL where one week it feels like the teams at the top of the division are going to get out to such a huge lead that the season is over. And then the Browns, Ravens, and Steelers all lose and everything is right in the world again.

Quick hitters:

  1. I can’t get enough of the Detroit Lions. They’re a complete defensive mess, the offense looks like the Andre Ware Houston Cougars (with a running game) and the fans haven’t given up yet, so Ford Field is packed, loud and the fans are full of misery. It’s the perfect level of chaos to turn into content. The franchise has been great four weeks into the season. Thank you, Detroit.
  2. Why does it feel like Tom Brady won’t make it to the finish line this season?
  3. Baker Mayfield is one more INT away from his Carolina career ending in Week 5.
  4. Justin Fields completed 11 passes on the Giants. ELEVEN!
  5. The Seahawks had never played a game without attempting a punt…until Sunday in Detroit.
  6. The Eagles now have the highest probability of winning the Super Bowl — 13%.
  7. Pending a miracle season out of a rookie quarterback, Mike Tomlin is on the way to his first sub-.500 season of his NFL career. He’s in his 16th season! Of all the things that make you stop and realize how fast time flies, that’s one right there. It feels like Bill Cowher’s been gone at most 8-10 years.
  8. Yes, ESPN splashed a possible QB controversy across its front page this morning. Cooper Rush is 3-0, completing nearly 61% of his passes, and hasn’t thrown an INT in 102 attempts.

NFL remaining strength of schedule: the Lions are screwed; the Falcons have a manageable schedule.

Snackle box

• Gerard W. writes:

You casually mentioned purchasing a Traeger earlier in the week.  How do you like it?  What does Mrs. Caps think of it?  Any good recipes you want to share?  Are you still longing for a flat top?

Went on the river with a buddy this summer and the boat next to us offered to make us Bloody Mary’s.  They pulled out this Snackle Box with all the fixns for the Bloody Mary.  What a genius idea.  I assume these are all over tailgates this fall? 

Yes, I did buy a Traeger during a Costco run where I was weak and needed something to cook up the meats. It’s been great. I don’t have any grand reports of smoking pork butts or smoking pumpkin spice latte on the thing for my wife’s morning drinks, but it’s been wonderful for our chicken dishes, wings, burgers, and shrimp.

Will I get a flat top? No.

I understand some of you love the feeling of being in control of the outdoor kitchen. It’s not in my DNA. I don’t need to be outside acting like I’m whipping up a meal at Waffle House or some hibachi chef with all eyes on me as I build an onion volcano.

I prefer to ram that meat-o-meter into the chicken breast and get back in the pool.

Between the Battery Daddy, TNML gear and the Snackle Box, it looks like wives just completed their Christmas shopping. Keep it simple this year, ladies.

Come to the Tennessee-Georgia tailgate

• Sam L. writes:

Long story short….  I invited you a while back to join our tailgate in Athens. 

This is pretty much our biggest home game.  (Yes, I’m assuming that UGA is still rolling over everyone.) I imagine that if both teams are still running well, well, Clay the Boss will be also in town.

But no matter what, we’re doing Jägerbomb shots.  (Which I believed got you interested…….)

Sorry, Sam. That game is November 5 and I’ll be on the road with my wife for her 40th birthday.

Unearthing manly topics

• John L. writes:

Joe, I feel that I could write you daily in appreciation of your awesome column.  The ability to unearth such manly and American topics like stacking wood just amazes me.

Today’s video of the hole-in-one at Pebble Beach was inspiring.  But sorry to say that Dani Torres has a huge ass.

You da man!

P.S. Once it was pointed out to me, I have to agree that Hildee’s belly button is disturbing.

P.P.S. A near-perfect Saturday for me: Fueled up with breakfast at Blue Bee’s Café while enjoying the paper, then painting the downstairs hallway (which is making my wife extremely happy) in easy range of college football on the TV, followed by the annual chile night at our local volunteer fire department.

Speaking of Hilde, I’m glad John brought up the email-creating machine. She fired off a new post this weekend. Go ahead and analyze the belly button.

Nature is healing in Florida

• Ken S. in North Augusta, SC writes:

Relatives in Miami sent this video. Hurricane Ian didn’t do much to Miami. Water levels in the Everglades are slightly up.

First responders stepped up and saved a life

• Grant H. in Crosby, ND sent an email last week about a situation at a recent high school football game where two Screencaps readers, Nate N. and Dillon L., were on the sideline coaching when one of their players went into cardiac arrest.

During a September 9 game, senior Ole Svangstu collapsed after a third-quarter play and first responders saved his life.

“It could have happened sitting at the kitchen table, or one day while we were in the field or the pasture and the outcome would have been dramatically different,” Ole’s father told TV station KFYR.

“We’ve been told – even from the doctors – that it’s a true miracle. It’s a good reminder to keep the faith and that miracles do happen still this day and age and we need to remember that,” Ole’s mother added.

And with that, let’s get rolling. Mondays are always packed so it’s time to hit publish and start the day.

Have a great first week of October. We’re about to get our first official frost of the season and it’s about that time to hunker down for the long winter.


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Written by Joe Kinsey

I'm an Ohio guy, born in Dayton, who roots for Ohio State and can handle you guys destroying the Buckeyes, Urban Meyer and everything associated with Columbus.

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