Survey: Skipping the Vaccine Will Cost You Sex

There's an aggressive push for Americans to get vaccinated against COVID-19. Some employers mandate it. Others have offered financial incentives for it. The rest will likely email each employee the following survey.

In May, the dating app Bumble surveyed roughly 1,000 Americans and found that 30% of the country will not date or have sex with someone who hasn't gotten the vaccine. Looks, money, and humor be damned.

(Leave the marriage jokes out.)

Though that's less than half, we are talking about Americans here. If their chances of having sex decline even slightly, they'll have a new look, attitude, wardrobe, and perhaps a new job the next day.

Bumble also warned that the pandemic has dramatically altered social and sexual interactions. The app is here to help.

"Bumble will also offer complimentary credits for premium features to those who enable the 'Vaccinated' badge," CNET reports.

"These will include giving them the Spotlight, which advances their profiles to the top of the stack, and SuperSwipe, which lets them signal to a potential match that they stand out."

You may soon find that your close friend, who has opted to skip the shot, is now carrying a vaccine verification card. Why? To improve their chances of getting laid.

So what does the 30% really mean? Super hot chicks don't have to get vaccinated to go on dates or have sex.

In other words, it just tells us what we already knew.