I’m no rattlesnake expert like some of you across the south but I know massive rattlesnakes when I see them, and two venomous hogs created content this week in Alabama and Mississippi. WVTM (NBC) 13 in Birmingham, Alabama fired off a tweet Thursday showing a rattlesnake crossing a road at Oak Mountain State Park, which is 20 miles south of Birmingham and then posted a photo of another massive rattler that didn’t survive in Simpson County, Mississippi.
A huge debate has broken out on the Mississippi rattlesnake size because of the angle at which the photo was taken. I’m not here to debate the killing of the rattlesnake. I’m here to say I want nothing to do with either of those snakes. I don’t care if there’s forced perspective by the person who used his/her phone to take a photo of the dead snake.
RATTLESNAKE! Check out this big snake spotted slithering across the road at Oak Mountain State Park today! 🐍😱
🎥 ride_today pic.twitter.com/RRK3rJVmyP
— #WVTM13 (@WVTM13) July 22, 2021
I know what I’m seeing in the video out of Alabama, and my ass would be hauling for the safest space I could get in if that thing came within 100 yards of me. The Bama snake experts say that’s a timber rattlesnake and it’s protected. I’ll take their word for it. The Smithsonian says that the timber typically checks in at 2.5 to 5 feet in length, but they have been known to get to 7 feet long.
That’s right, I’m going full lib and jumping in a padded wall safe space and curling up in a ball. I get that some of you grew up wrestling venomous snakes and have them as pets, blah, blah, blah.
Not me, dawgs. I’m out on this one. I’ll gladly provide the timber with all the room he/she needs.