Jeff Bezos Is Going To Launch His Girlfriend Into Space

Jeff Bezos is going to launch his girlfriend into space, and that’s not an old-timey, Honeymooners-esque joke.

It would be if anyone else said it, but he owns rockets so it’s actually true.

Bezos and his girlfriend, journalist Lauren Sanchez sat down with CNN for their first joint interview, which is a big step in any relationship.

They said what anyone would say if they had to talk about their relationship on national TV. Stuff like “We’re really great teammates” and “We bring each other energy.”

Then they talked about something most couples can’t take about: their space travel plans.

Jeff Bezos is of course the founder of Blue Origin, the space agency known for their phallically-shaped spacecraft and the time he sent William Shatner into space, then sprayed Champagne in the Star Trek legend’s face while he tried to articulate what a life-changing experience it was.

Now, Sanchez says she has plans to travel to space with “great group of females” at some point in 2023.

However, don’t be fooled. Sanchez is a licensed pilot and founded Black Ops Aviation, an aerial film and production company.

This is to say she’s not scared of flying, and every bit as qualified to go to space as her beau, the richest man in the world who doesn’t own Twitter.

In fact, Sanchez even judges Bezos’ helicopter flying.

“I’ve also learned how to fly the helicopter,” Bezos said “And she’s a horrible backseat pilot. She’s terrible!”

Sure sounds like trouble in paradise to me.

The two also discussed Bezos’ plan to give away most of his wealth during his lifetime. However, he said he didn’t have a plan for how to go about doing that.

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Written by Matt Reigle

Matt is a University of Central Florida graduate and a long-suffering Philadelphia Flyers fan living in Orlando, Florida. He can usually be heard playing guitar, shoe-horning obscure quotes from The Simpsons into conversations, or giving dissertations to captive audiences on why Iron Maiden is the greatest band of all time.

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