‘Friends’ Creator Apologizes With $4 Million Donation for Lack of Diversity in Show

This is perhaps the most pathetic seven figures ever spent.

The creator of the television show Friends, Marta Kauffman, will part ways with $4 million to make up for the lack of diversity in the program that ended in 2004.

Kauffman is sorry there were too many white people in Friends and has pledged to donate $4 million to fund African and African American studies at Brandeis University as a result.

A $4 million apology for not casting enough diverse performers in a show that began in 1994. Got it.

"I've learned a lot in the last 20 years," Kauffman said. "Admitting and accepting guilt is not easy. It's painful looking at yourself in the mirror. I'm embarrassed that I didn't know better 25 years ago."

Of course, Kauffman isn't actually sorry. Instead, she's afraid because miserable critics with not much else to do have bombarded Kauffman with nasty messages for scripting a show with six white heterosexual friends.

Last week, we explained in a column that most public figures see an apology, no matter the cost, as the only avenue to peace. Unfortunately, Kauffman's was more costly than a simple "I'm sorry, please, forgive me" Tweet.

"In this case, I'm finally, literally putting my money where my mouth is," Kauffman said of her donation. "I feel I was finally able to make some difference in the conversation."

"I have to say, after agreeing to this and when I stopped sweating, it didn't unburden me, but it lifted me up. But until in my next production, I can do it right, it isn't over. I want to make sure from now on in every production I do that I am conscious in hiring people of color and actively pursue young writers of color. I want to know I will act differently from now on. And then I will feel unburdened."

Blah, blah, blah.

If Kauffman ever stops reading the angry notes, she'd realize that sane viewers do not care about the skin colors of television characters. Viewers just want good content, whether the characters are white, black, or green.

And Friends is a great program, a Mount Rushmore sitcom candidate.

Stop apologizing unless you have something to apologize for. Marta Kauffman has nothing to apologize for. Pathetic.