My mom, the golf course starter, is here for a visit and I get to hear golf course stories
Mom was walking around the kitchen area this morning and saw my bottle of Fireball on a bar shelf and said, “Guys at the course take Fireball out with them,” which leads to a conversation about how these guys in their early 60s at my mom’s retiree park in Largo, Florida will play the nine-hole course twice and suck down some Fireballs along the way.
Last night, I got to hear about how some guy just barreled up to No. 1 in his golf cart without a tee time, and mom had to lecture him because she had people with a tee time reservation 10 minutes behind him. Of all the jobs my mom has had over her lifetime, I never thought she’d get into the golf course management business. I don’t think she’s ever picked up a club in her life, but here she is managing tee times, dealing with hoodlum retirees smuggling Fireball and COVID rules and regulations, which led to the story of the old lady who wants to play golf, but she needs a cart to do so. The problem? She doesn’t have a cart, and she’s not allowed to share a cart with someone else because the park has a strict COVID rule that there will be no cart sharing amongst those who don’t reside in the same residence at the golf course.
Another story I heard last night was how the course maintenance director has been there for 20-plus years and treats that course as his baby. It’s all he can think about. It’s his life. From what I’m hearing, he’s the anti-Miguel from the Club Pro Guy course.
Mom will be here a few days before going back to her life in the starter’s shed, managing the old people who are now playing as early as possible so they don’t get burnt up by the Florida sun. The course is down to half-days, as most of the white hairs have either holed up for the summer or driven north to escape the humidity. Florida 9-hole starters have officially entered the offseason.
• And just like that, $200 billion in Bitcoin has been wiped out as the crypto has dipped below $50,000/coin. Buy the dip? Is this the bottom? You guys have quite a bit to think about this afternoon at the 19th hole after scooting out of work at lunch.
• This is reassuring news. Consumer Reporters says Tesla’s autopilot system is easily tricked into thinking someone is in the driver’s seat. This comes after two men were killed in a Tesla crash where investigators said they’re 100% certain the driver seat was empty when the car crashed. I guess someone has to die to make way for advancements in technology. RIP, fellas.
• How crazy is the card-grading world right now? Professional Sports Authenticator reports they’re grading 20,000 cards a day to keep up with the volume that’s coming in.
• As for the weekend to-do list, it appears there will be minimal projects since mom is here to visit. After the snow this week, it’s probably time to get the mower out and prep for the 83 and sunny that’s coming on Tuesday. Time to get ahead of the grass before it requires 2-3 cuts per week.
Numbers from :
Today the Reds became the first team in MLB history to lose despite hitting 6+ home runs and having its starting pitcher allow 2 runs or fewer.
— Stats By STATS (@StatsBySTATS) April 22, 2021
Stuff You Guys Sent In & Stuff I Like:
Obsessed with this fan at the Giants game pic.twitter.com/ORV5ce58Wz
— rachael ⚾️ (@maxfischers) April 23, 2021
— Club Pro Guy (@ClubProGuy) April 23, 2021
Lost the nachos and the ball. Rough day at the office for dad pic.twitter.com/rG7AKJGSY5
— Joe Kinsey (@JoeKinseyexp) April 22, 2021
Grand Slam Harvey and the Cavs pic.twitter.com/WXWLoVlyi0
— MLB Closed Captioning (@mlb_cc) April 22, 2021
WWF held Wrestlefest in 1988 at Milwaukee County Stadium!
The main event… Hulk Hogan v André the Giant… IN A STEELE CAGE MATCH 🤼♀️ pic.twitter.com/3AlgbsC3ex
— Paper Stadiums 🏟 (@PaperStadiums) April 22, 2021
— Wrestling from 80s/90s (@Wrestling80s90s) April 23, 2021
Throwback to when Earl Hebner lost it and beat up DX 😂 pic.twitter.com/ZgYgM5Q0q4
— 90s WWE (@90sWWE) April 22, 2021
— Classic Tennessee Pictures (@classicTNpics) April 22, 2021
— Korn Ferry Tour (@KornFerryTour) April 22, 2021
what the hell are they doing pic.twitter.com/dODxxa6Wn2
— ✯ (@CIitLuvr) April 20, 2021
— NASA (@NASA) April 23, 2021
The rafflesia has no stems, no leaves, and no roots. The largest flower on Earth is a holoparasite of vines that smells like rotting flesh and can weigh up to 22 lb. 🌸#EarthMonth #EarthDay pic.twitter.com/FzAjHvLwmG
— Science Channel (@ScienceChannel) April 22, 2021