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Jackson State head coach Deion Sanders can’t quite flush away the memory of used toilet paper sitting upon his throne.
Can you blame him?
Sanders, who labels the toilet tissue stationed inside the JSU facility “booty paper,” wants his JSU players to start cleaning up after they’ve cleaned themselves. And if they don’t? Well, they’ll have to hold it until they can find someone else’s porcelain to pounce.
That was the message Prime Time preached in a spring meeting with his players.
“When you go pee, and somebody leaves they booty paper on the toilet? I got a problem with that,” Sanders said. “How hard is it to take your booty paper and just throw it in the toilet and flush it?”
The man has a point.
Sanders went on to explain what we all know happens next: “The next person that comes to the bathroom has to touch your booty paper and put it in the toilet so it flushes. I got a problem with that.”
Neon Deion’s problem comes with a coach-made solution that could make for some uncomfortable Tiger bladders. “I’m just gonna bar that whole toilet (next time he finds booty paper on the seat), and that’s gonna minimize your toilets.”
Coach Prime Hates Booty Paper
— COACH PRIME (@DeionSanders) April 6, 2022
But(t) booty paper isn’t the only thing that Sanders finds stinky about his Jackson State players’ bathroom habits.
More specifically, Sanders is less than thrilled that one of his players has been helping themselves to his personal plumbing.
“This one kinda got to me. I got a bathroom that I feel like is my bathroom because I claimed it,” Sanders told his team recently. “And I hooked it up. It’s really nice.”
Coach Prime then rolled a video of his personal JSU bathroom.
“Who would go in that bathroom knowing that no other bathroom looks like that (within the facility) and feel free,” Prime asked rhetorically.
Sanders pointed out a red folder seen on the video which was left in his bathroom. Moments later a staffer handed Deion the folder in question so he could identify the bathroom bandit in front of his teammates. The Tigers players roared with laughter and even got Coach Prime to crack a smile.
Apparently the only thing Sanders couldn’t lock down was his own bathroom.
Who woulda figured?
The unidentified Tiger then made his way to the front of the room to greet Sanders and reclaim his red folder. Sanders reacted by telling the player, “I hope you had a good dump.”
Jackson State likely won’t release an official depth chart until the week of their season opener (Sept. 4 versus Florida A&M), but it’s a safe bet to say the red folder player will be listed at number 2 for his position.
Follow along on Twitter: @OhioAF