Scientists Make Discovery About Adolf Hitler We All Pretty Much Knew Already

Just when you think you know a guy!

A new DNA analysis of Adolf Hitler (as if we needed any more of those) has been released, and it has revealed something that, if you're familiar with the man at all, shouldn't come as much of a surprise to you.

It's amazing that this guy has been dead for 80 years, and we are still finding out embarrassing things about him.

According to the New York Post article, the former dictator of Nazi Germany left behind some blood on a sofa where he died by suicide in 1945.

From an analysis of that blood sample, DNA tests were able to prove that Hitler had a hidden genetic disorder known as Kallmann syndrome, which can inhibit the development of sexual organs during puberty.

Scientists claim there is a 1 in 10 chance that the Fuehrer had a micropenis in addition to his lone testicle.

And, in case you need a reminder or if the Post just wanted to rub salt in the wound, a micropenis is any penis that measures less than two inches in length.

Brutal.

To be honest, I never bought the whole "failed art student" storyline from historians.

Something much bigger (or, in this case, smaller) had to have been afoot that made this man lose his marbles and commit one of the biggest atrocities in human history.

There is a greater than zero percent chance some chick made fun of him and left him for a guy with more manhood, and with that, we got everything that happened during his reign in the 1930s and 40s.

As if this guy needed anything else to make him more of a pathetic loser, scientists were able to toss us a lob for an alley-oop today.

The comments were equally brutal yet entertaining.

Remember, having a micropenis doesn't make you a bad guy.

But committing the Holocaust does, and the micropenis insults are just tacked on for good measure.

Or, bad measure.

I'll be here all week, folks!