Salma Hayek Washes Ashore On A Tropical Beach & Dumps Out Content, RIP NFL Chain Gangs, Plus Burritos!
A Millennial with a newborn baby boy reaches out for advice
— Jesse writes:
I wrote you and introduced myself back in Sep2024. I’m about to be 31 in a few months and my wife is a few years younger than me. We just had our first child yesterday, 26Feb2025, a little boy.
As I’m writing this, Im sitting next to him as my wife is asleep (getting much needed rest from her badass performance in the delivery room). First I want to say how much more respect I have for women considering what my wife just went through. Childbirth is an incredible moment.
The second thing I’m thinking about is something I wanted to ask the SC community…What advice can the dads out there give me?
It doesn’t have to be long and elaborate.
Maybe just a small little get to the point advice. Life so far has been awesome with my wife, but now ours is changing forever. This community is awesome, keep up the great work! I’ll still be reading daily SC during paternity leave. One day once my son is old enough and SC is still a thing, I can guarantee you’ll gain another reader.
Kinsey:
Off the top of my head.
- Make sure you and your wife get out for meals NOW when he'll just lay in that mobile baby car seat carrier and barely make a peep. You'll thank me in 8-10 months when he can really cry and your days of going out without a babysitter are put on hold.
- Make sure you get some fresh air. That means, if there's tension in the air inside the house, go let the wind hit you in the face. Same goes for your wife.
- Don't be afraid to throw the boy in the car and take him for a ride, if he won't sleep. Screencaps Jr. would just cry and cry at like 3:30 a.m. with Mrs. Screencaps needing to be up and at work at 8. I would get up, put him in the car and we'd go for rides. I'd come home, park in the driveway and just enjoy the quiet. He'd sleep like a baby and so would Mrs. Screencaps.
- The kid won't remember Disney. There's no need to go into debt so you have photos to post on Facebook.
- Never forget that you can do it. There are some real morons out there who somehow raise kids. You're clearly not a moron. Take it one diaper at a time and keep telling yourself that the morons somehow get through it, you will too. In a matter of no time you'll be throwing a ball with your son and he'll be able to wipe his own ass.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com
I would like to remind you guys why you read this column: We are ahead of the news on numerous topics
I know we were ahead on the state of tipping. And I damn well know we were ahead of the Big Js on the disappearance of the NFL chain gangs.
Now comes this news — the gangs are on life support, and it's looking like their death will come in 2026.
This question came up in our family this week: What do teenagers do these days for fun now that the mall is typically off-limits in most cities?
Do teenagers leave the house?
We had to run to Books-a-Million on Tuesday because Screencaps Jr. needed a book and the place had about four to six teenagers walking around. 15 years ago, the place would've have 40 teenagers walking around fake looking at books and mingling with their friends.
Where did all the teenagers go?
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com
I don't ski, so I don't know if this is impressive
— Chad G. writes:
In the spirit if 'Do Hard Things' .... we had a day today at Keystone resort in Colorado. Our group age is high 40s and early 50s, skied 28,000 vertical feet
Kinsey:
Since I'm not a skier, I went to my trusty ChatGPT app to see if Chad G. is trying to pull a fast one on me. It turns out the AI chatbot is VERY impressed by this accomplishment from a bunch of guys my age and just a little bit older.
Chad G. and the boys have some serious cardio fitness, according to the bot.
Now I need to hear how many draft beers they crushed at the lodge.
Do you really need to carry an alignment stick in your golf bag? We have a little bit of drama building, folks
— Jim M. takes a shot at Jason W.:
-I just wanna let alignment stick guy know that already in your gof bag there are 14 alignment sticks
- He has to be learning the finer points of AimPoint....the most annoying thing I've ever seen in golf...BAN IT
-Lemme go check my bag see what I have in there......only new submission I have is lead tape...iykyk.
- Toilet paper a must! I had food poisoning in the State Am one year ..... wasn't pretty
-When I caddied in the late 70's ,80's if anyone had a Groove Tube attached to their bag...we would run. Definition of a hacker... as were iron covers . Ok I'm done.
Don't mean to insult anyone !!! But an alignment stick? Remember.. Jack is still better than Tiger...he did it with lesser technology and he would have out drove Tiger by 20 with the new tech!
How to gamble like a real degenerate: Advice from Screencaps readers
I can't remember who asked for ways to gamble on the golf course, but, boy, did it ever light a fire under the asses of golfers in this community.
My brain is swirling from all these emails. You guys truly are degens.
— Michael C. suggests:
A good golf gambling game to play with golfers of differing abilities is this putting game.
Once everyone is on the green the value for each putt is established. Player furthest away is $4, next is $3, then $2 with the closest $1. If a player 1-putts he gets the value of his putt. Anything made from off the green is $5.
— Glenn Z. knows how to gamble on the course:
Everyone in our foursome at the start of the round puts a $20 on the ground and we flip the tee. 1st golfer holds the money until he 3 putts or double bogies. then it goes to the 2 spot and so on. On 18 whoever has the money fails then the next person fails everyone gets the money back. (no freebies.)
— Dave in Rhode Island, who is fresh off his Puerto Rican vacation with his wife, emails:
We have been playing the game "Wolf" on the course for the past few years, it's a great game to bet, basically picking a partner on each hole, or going it alone (Wolf) when it's your turn in the rotation. Pretty simple to understand, too long to type out, here is a link to the general rules:
https://www.tampabaydowns.com/mastering-the-wolf-golf-game-rules-scoring-and-betting/
We play for "dots", team that wins the hole gets one dot each. If the Wolf wins outright on the whole, he (or she) gets two dots from the other three players. Ties are a push. You can vary the rules and value of a dot as you see fit. Add dots up at the end and pay out.
— Nman (this might be a first-time emailer) says:
Best game for foursome is a standard 2 v 2 best ball Nassau with side bets for birdies and dots. We usually play a standard $20 / $10 / $5 or $10 / $5 / $2. The first number is the amount of the Nassau bet and you can play automatic presses if you want, amounts negotiable.
The second number is the value of any gross birdies. The third is the value of the dots. You can decide what constitutes a dot. We usually play closest to pin on greens of par 3s and 5s and sand saves. You can also play long drives on par 5s and longest second shot in fairway on par 5s. Each dot is worth the monetary designation agreed upon.
The low handicap guys like the dots in exchange for giving the most shots on the Nassau bet so it’s always a good balance.
— Of course Kevin in Wisconsin gambles on the golf course:
We play a game called Carts, Others, Drivers or COD. Its a 3 point game for four players. It's a 2 v 2 best ball with strokes on your handicap which helps with having good players vs high handicappers. 1 point is awarded for the lowest best ball and 1 point is awarded for the highest score. Once you get to 3 points, the game switches from the Carts (2 players from same cart vs the other cart) to Others (Driver in Cart 1 with the Passenger in Cart 2 vs the opposite) and then to Drivers who team up vs the passengers and then back to Drivers if you have multiple games in a round and so on.
We play $5/man per game and the game adds $5 if one team goes up but then the score flips from one hole to the next. So, for example, if, on hole one, Cart 1 scores a net par and net bogey and Cart 2 scores net bogey/bogey, Cart 1 would get 1 point for the low net and the high net is tied. If on Hole 2, Cart 1 scores net bogey, double bogey and Cart 2 scores net par, net bogey, they would receive 2 points for the low net and the other team with the high net and now they would be up 1 point overall and now the score has flipped and $5 is added making that game now worth $10/man. We also usually play $25 skins per man.
Finally, whatever team is up on 18 wins the final bet, even though it isn't a full 3 points. We have often gone an entire 18 holes, never changing teams but it usually has 4 or 5 flips making things very interesting at the end.
Great game that levels the playing field and usually get to play with different partners during the round.
— Rich from Northern Virginia will take your money:
1. Modified Stableford based off your indexes, $$ per player into the pot: -1 triple or higher, 0 for double, 1 for par, 4 for bird and above. Example: With my 12.8 index, my course handicap at 11, I need to accumulate 26 points to go positive and win the pot i.e. make more than 36
2. Trash Dots: Greenies (Par 3s) - on the green and make par $$, Sandies - Par from a trap $$, Pollies - Using your putter anywhere around the green longer with a hole out $$, Birds - $$, there are probably others that you could add to the list.
3. Hole in One you're buying drinks
4. 6/6/6 best ball matchplay, again using indexes, $$ per 6 holes, pairing for 1st 6 is closest two drives, 2nd 6 closest drives who have not already played together, last 6 the last pair. This will distribute that good player with everyone in the group. Example: Course Handicaps of 7, 12, 15, & 17 - The A player is giving strokes of 3, 4, & 5 of the hardest holes on Front and 2, 4, & 5 on the back. Similar for the other players.
5. Wolf - Matchplay when you have an odd number of players. https://theleftrough.com/wolf-golf-game/ Call your teammate on Par 3s when the Tee Shot is in the air. Order of play is rotated for Tee shots starting on hole 1 lowest index to highest.
There are a bunch of other games that you can find on the Net but these will hone your competitive edge. These games can be played for big or small $$ depending on how deep your group's pockets.
— Jim T. says to mix beers into your gambling:
Beer golf. You can subtract one stroke for each 12-oz can or bottle consumed on the course.
Now, there's a fine line between subtracting and adding in this game! My approach, back when I still drank, was to average one beer every three holes until 15 or 16, and then start pounding and hope it doesn't hit me until I'm walking off 18!
— Chris B. keeps it simple:
Look at Bad Cards Fore Good Golfers
Bought these a few years ago to try and mix it up and I’m usually the worst one out there. I haven’t used them yet, but have gone through them and there are some doozies.
It’s completely random, so there is that; but the better golfers will still be at an advantage unless they can’t hold their booze as there are also cards where you could be drinking a lot. There’s a few different varieties, so you can mix it up to what you’re looking for.
— Gary K. suggests:
Long-time reader, first time email.
Checkout - www.gamblingolf.com (Not Sponsored) - Young entrepreneurs making a run at it - Rebrand coming soon
Enjoy Screencaps everyday. Keep it up.
Kinsey:
And, finally, let's go to Dave C. who will really have your head spinning.
— Dave C. explains:
Michael S. was looking for some gambling games to play on the course and without knowing how much money they are looking to gamble I wouldn’t want to suggest one, however most of the gambling wages could be adapted for different wages by the players involved. I would highly recommend Doug Sanders book, Action on the 1st tee, 130 different ways to make a bet, written with Russ Pate. This book may be hard to find however you will be amazed of the different games these pros came up with. Some of the accolades on this book were written by Sam Snead, who said "there will never be a gamblers Hall Of Fame, but if there were, Doug Sanders would be the first man inducted." Another from Chi Chi Rodriguez, "no player in the history of the game has been more successful playing with his own money. Doug has never backed down from Nassau no matter what the amount to be wagered".
One crazy example in this book is called $.10 a hole. It starts by playing low ball for $.10 a hole however, the bet doubles on every hole and the play carryovers. By the back nine the wager has really started to mount. Heres what the payoff in the game looks like:
Hole Payoff Hole Payoff
1. $.10 10. 51.20
2. .20 11. 102.40
3. .40 12. 204.80
4. .80 13. 409.60
5. 1.60 14. 819.20
6. 3.20 15. 1,638.40
7. 6.40 16. 3,276.80
8. 12.80 17. 6,553.60
9. 25.60 18. 13,107.20
Hopefully he and anyone else interested can still find the book, and I will guarantee you that they will find a game that suits their foresome or group. If interested, I can send you some everyday for screencaps.
7-footer Big Cozy's dad is a Screencaps reader and was a Screencaps emailer before his son became a viral superstar
— Chris Williams (revealing his name because his son's last name is right there on the screen) emailed me in November 2021:
Also forgot to mention that my son was in your Screencaps last Thursday 11/11. Random College athletes was my son Connor! Small world!
Kinsey:
Now here we are all these years later and Big Cozy's college basketball career has come to a close. Time really does fly. BTW, Chris still emails from time to time.
How's this for a senior season from Big Cozy:
- Averaged 14.5 ppg
- 7 boards per game
- Started 24 out the team's 25 games
- Averaged 25 minutes per game
- Took the 2nd most 3s on the team and had the team's 2nd best 3PT%
- 76% from the free throw line
- Shot 54% from the field
In a January contest, Cozy dropped a career-high 36 points and had 7 rebounds.
Just a perfect day in Arizona taking in Spring Training
— Charlie T. reports:
Over 50% Chief Wahoo apparel there.
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That should do it for this final Thursday in February. You'll never live through another 2025 February Thursday. Go make it a special one.
Tomorrow, I'll show you guys a video from Mike T. where he shows us a unique toilet in Trapani, Sicily. Was I expecting a video of Mike T. narrating flushing an Italian toilet? No. But, that's the type of content that keeps you coming back day after day. That's the beauty of this column.
Now, let's close up shop and get after it. Go have a great day in the greatest land in the world. Be proud you get to call this home.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com