Salma Hayek Throws It Back, Hollywood Mickelson Struggles With The Putter & College World Series Jell-o Shot Challenge Is Off And Running
I made it.
That huge sigh of relief is me finally making it to Friday before golf trip week. Guys, it's been one helluva run since Labor Day 2021 when I put the hammer down and worked pretty much six to seven days a week for 9 1/2 months in some capacity. I'd have to go back and look, but I think Screencaps has been six-days-a-week for all but one week over that stretch.
And it was 7-days-a-week through the NFL playoffs.
That changes next week when I'm off -- DARK, don't bother emailing me Wednesday, Thursday, Friday -- and pretty much escaping social media for four days.
I want to give all of you the heads up on how this will go down:
Monday: Normal schedule
Tuesday: Normal
Wednesday: Screencaps will be normal, but then I'm leaving early, no need to email me because I'm not checking it
Thursday: OutKick's Anthony Farris (Anthony.Farris@OutKick.com -- hammer him with emails if you'd like) is your guest Screencaps editor
Friday: Farris is back for another tour of duty
Saturday: I'm pretty sure Farris is going to handle Screencaps Lite
Again, save the emails, I'm not even opening the email app on my phone. I'm also not taking a laptop. Take a break. Consider it the all-star break.
Disney trip observations from a Screencaps veteran
• Louie from Savannah is at the Magic Kingdom and files this report:
Louie here, reporting live from the Surface of the Sun, aka Disney. It’s hot, beyond hot.
I am a New England guy but I have been living in Savannah for 15 years so I do well in the heat. I go jogging at 2:00 in the afternoon in July. As long as I have shades, some water, and some Gold Bond, I am good. My wife and sons are all heat acclimated too…. But 13 hours at Magic Kingdom nearly broke us. We endured however, and the boys had a blast, as well as my nephews and niece. That’s right, rolling in a group of 11 down here.
Some notes from Magic Kingdom (yes I made notes in my phone like an actual journalist. I feel like Caps readers deserve an accurate account).
I am rocking my TNML shirt here at immediate med, you’ll have to take my word though because they would try to commit me if I took a selfie right now. Lol. Might need a substitute for next Thursday, I guess I shouldn’t have put off buying the new riding mower. Maybe a good opportunity to get the 9 year old involved? I will update ….
Stay safe!
Louie adds:
Toe not broken, bad contusion.
Should be business as usual next Thursday.
20,000 steps at Hollywood Studios should be a blast tomorrow. Lol
The No. 2 at Disney with kids outside the door had me rolling. Can't say I've ever had to drop an emergency deuce at the Happiest Place on Earth, but just the fear of this type of moment has me chuckling.
As for the Disney food situation, hate it. We were there this past Thanksgiving and it was my No. 1 biggest issue with the visit. Why can't I just walk up to buy a hot dog and a soft pretzel without a damn reservation? Figure it out, Mickey.
That said, I think the wives and sisters-in-law love this whole restaurant reservation thing because they love schedules. Wives need an itinerary. We know that. Us guys would just roll into one of these places and order up some grub whenever we're hungry. Not the wives.
WE HAVE TO BE AT GASTON'S TAVERN BY NOON, KEVIN! I TOLD YOU, WE HAVE RESERVATIONS! DON'T EVEN START WITH ME. WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE HAPPY AND YOU'RE MAKING THINGS MISERABLE. ENOUGH!
And one more thing about Louie's trip, a huge thank you goes out to Louie's wife for not forcing him to wear the matching Disney shirt. It's so great to see Louie representing the league colors on a Thursday. This is big. You know there were dads walking around Disney nodding their approval.
Screencaps Maps
• Matt B. writes:
This is a town of a county in Massachusetts
No surprise there is a place with this name in this liberal wasterland…
Herb Z. in Roswell, GA writes:
I grew up in Lancaster, Pa where there are small towns named all close to each other named:
Virginville
Bird-in-Hand
Blue Ball
Intercourse
Paradise
I wish I had signs to show, but there used to tshirts sold that showed “the path”. I am sure someone has one.
Somewhere I have a photo of myself out front of Blue Ball's bowling alley. I need to dig up that photo. A quick Google Maps search reveals that the bowling alley is now an indoor gun range. RIP Blue Ball Lanes.
Herb's right, Amish country has some amazing town names and streets. I spent four years living in NE Pennsylvania and spent many random days looking around that area for signs.
Father's Day MEAT!
• Mike T. in Eagle, Idaho is ready for his Father's Day BBQ. Look at this hog 4" porterhouse. I could measure my mower setting with that beast.
Mike reports:
Having left knee replaced on Tuesday, Cindy T will be filling in next week with the Donald.
The Donald is Mike's mower (I believe it's a Honda) that he bought with the Trump stimulus check.
Fire pit recommendations
• Michael B. writes:
Saw Matt’s post looking for fire pit recommendations. Solo Stove all night, every night! Smokeless and mesmerizing!
Beau in Toledo in the wild & snapping photos
• Beau writes:
Stay classy, East Toledo.
Stream of consciousness
• Mark in Frisco, TX writes:
Good morning Joe. Haven’t written in a while, but keeping up with SC every day. Just got back from Topsail, NC where my brother-in-law and I would peruse the page every morning while watching the waves. Good times. We also got to play golf at Camp Lejeune, which was awesome. You haven’t lived til you’re lining up a putt with the artillery range/Ospreys/helicopters are making noise around you. God bless those Marines.
I know there are some car guys in this group, so thought I’d share my “do hard things” project. I hauled off and bought a muscle car. The front end suspension was shot, so I decided to replace it all myself. I still have to adjust the ride height, but I’m finished with the install and it rides great. I tried to show off my work to my wife, but her only comment was “Is that blood?” Yes, I left some blood here and there, as well as a ton of brake fluid (see the kitty litter underneath), but I used “Do Hard Things” as my mantra.
Keep up the good work!
Another stream of consciousness
• BT in Pinckney, MI writes:
Couple of notes on today's screencaps column:
* Re: Travel Ball-- I played house league in suburban Detroit from the 80s-90s and we had probably 12-16 teams in each division from Tee-ball through about 12 yr old, then after 12 was the great migration for really competitive guys to go play on travel teams ("American Legion", etc) until it was time to play high school, but the house leagues still had 3-4 teams of guys playing through high school and even college summers.
And by "travel" that meant our team had league games from Port Huron to St Clair Shores to Southfield to Birmingham, with maybe a road trip to Toledo for a tournament, or the couple years we had a team from Courtright, Ontario in our league. (That was fun, crossing the border at the three car ferry boat stop that I think was at either St Clair or Marine City, MI). Our games were mostly 30-45 min car rides in metro Detroit area.
Even when I coached youth travel baseball (13-14 yr old) in Ann Arbor in my later college years (~2000-2001), our league was basically up and down US-23 & I-94 (Hartland to Milan, Jackson to Romulus). The most competitive travel team I ass't coached in 2002 we had league games in metro Detroit, one voluntary tourney in Cincy, and we made it to national level regional finals in Indianapolis for our association national tournament.
We had plenty of competition and practice time and kids could still do golf camps, swimming teams, vacations with mom and dad to places around the US (or to the cottage Up North and there was no shaming any families for missing games). I just don't get the obsession with taking teams of 8(!) year olds on cross country treks for triple header showcase tournaments. I'm purposely holding my eldest daughter back from travel softball because our youth city league has 6 teams in the local area and the season goes from late April to 4th of July. That's it, you have the rest of your summer to your life for Up North lake vacations, day trips to Michigan Adventure / Cedar Point, going to Tiger games, and playing with friends until the streetlights come on without fear of missing that 3rd optional hitting practice at the batting cage training complex at 7pm on a Wed night.
I just shake my head driving by the local high-priced-sports-training-complex on Sunday mornings at 830a as I drive to church seeing manicured fields already full of youth teams in their 3d alternate sponsored jerseys playing games.
If I was Sports King for the day, I'd de-certify every travel tournament company and organization for everything below 13 yr olds (baseball, softball, hockey, basketball, everything). City / county championship trophies would be important rights of passage again. Play local, build community with your teammates and neighbors and classmates-- they're going to be a bigger part of your life going forward than the 11 yr old mercenary from your Fall Ball Elite team with the parent who's tracking their spin rate from the stands on TikTok posts.
Then if God gifted you with talent and drive and some maturity, go after your dreams with your parents' dollars. But by all means, go be a KID first and foremost.
* Road sign fun: I grew up in suburban Detroit, and the most stolen road sign in the state during my youth was the exit sign for "Exit 69 Big Beaver Rd" on I-75. Most of my years growing up, the exit sign was on the side of the interstate on a stand-alone sign that was maybe 3' x 5'.
After the umpteenth version was stolen sometime in the early 90s, Michigan DOT replaced the side mounted sign with a larger overhead sign that spanned across the lanes-- no punk teenagers are going to climb up and steal that anymore! There also used to be a pasty shop in the UP on the road from St Ignace to Tahquamenon Falls that had a huge billboard advertising "You're only one pasty away from Paradise" (since Paradise, MI on the shores of Lake Superior was the last real town you hit before you drive to the Falls).
I also had a roommate from my time at college that had a girlfriend from Lincoln Park, MI area that lived in a neighborhood near the intersection of Dix Hwy and Champaign Rd.. yep he had a girl that lived on "Dix & Champaign". And he'd never let anyone NOT know that fact when the end of the night came at the bar.
There isn't a guy reading this column who doesn't chuckle and make sure to let out a "There it is honey, Big Beaver road...exit 69!" line when you drive past Troy, MI on I-75. It's a red-blooded male tradition that must be passed down to your sons at some point down the road.
And there isn't a wife out there who doesn't think, I can't believe I married this guy after he drops his Big Beaver Rd. line.
And with that, let's get the day rolling along. I'm off to a Safety Town graduation for my five-year-old who is officially ready for kindergarten.
The sun is shining. There's golf to watch and this country -- even with its flaws -- is still the greatest place in the world to call home.
Have a great weekend.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com