Purple-Haired Starbucks Baristas Who Wear Masks & Kamala Shirts Are Refusing To Work Today

Happy Starbucks Red Cup Day to all who celebrate! A tradition unlike any other in this country. Big day. 

The day when you go to Starbucks because you're too lazy to make coffee at home, spend $12 for a weirdly-sized coffee because Starbucks refuses to use regular metrics, and get a free reusable red cup in return as if you just won a prize. 

It's what the suburban moms in this country wait for all year long. This is the unofficial kickoff to the holiday season. Red Cup Day. Nothing like it. 

Unfortunately, some folks won't get to experience this wonderful day in certain parts of the country. That's because the purple-haired Starbucks baristas with nose rings and "my body, my choice" shirts have chosen today to wage war with their employer. 

That's right. Workers at locations in dozens of cities are STRIKING today, and refusing to work until they get their fair share. 

Take that, corporate America!

There are other options for coffee, you know

From Fox Business:

More than 1,000 unionized Starbucks baristas went on strike at 65 stores in major U.S. cities Thursday, protesting stalled labor negotiations with the company.

The strike aimed to disrupt Starbucks’ Red Cup Day — one of its busiest days — when the company hands out free reusable cups to holiday drink buyers.

"We’re turning the Red Cup Season into the Red Cup Rebellion. Starbucks’ refusal to settle a fair union contract and end union busting is forcing us to take drastic action," Dachi Spoltore, a barista in Pittsburgh, said in a press release from Starbucks Workers United, the union organizing the strike.

The Red Cup Rebellion! Amazing. Sounds like something out of Star Wars. What a time to be alive. God forbid you have to make coffee at home today or go to Dunkin. Oh no! 

I've never understood the walkouts when it comes to these labor disputes, but I really don't get this one. Starbucks doesn't exactly have the coffee market cornered. Do these baristas know there are, conservatively speaking, 30,000 other options for coffee in the morning?

• You could be a patriot and just brew it at home.
• You could go to Dunks. Or WaWa. Or 7/11. Or Cumby Farms. Or RaceTrac.
• Lord knows enough people go to Buc-ees on a daily basis.
• You could walk into any hotel lobby in America, act like you belong, and just get whatever they have out (vet move).
• You could go support your local economy and go downtown and get it from whatever coffee shop(s) you choose to frequent.
• You could go to McDonald's (sneaky good brew), or Burger King (I'd probably rather just choose tea), or Wendy's (whoooof).
• 9 times out of 10, you can walk into the grocery store, and they have a pot/kettle out up front. They do at Publix, but that's America's Supermarket, so I realize it's a different standard.

My point is, this isn't like workers striking at Amazon, where they pretty much have the "one-day-quick-delivery" market cornered. That would be chaos. This is Starbucks. The purple-haired baristas want more money. Fine. 

But for those who want more coffee, you can most likely just walk 50 yards to the Dunks across the street.