Our Long National Nightmare Is Over, Shohei Ohtani Is Signing With The Los Angeles Dodgers For The GDP Of A Small Country

Shohei Ohtani is joining the Los Angeles Dodgers. But, boy oh boy, does that bury the lede.

Friday was one of the wildest, wackiest, most comedic days in baseball free agency history. Internet sleuths were convinced that Ohtani was on a private plane from Orange County bound for Toronto. Turns out, it was a Canadian businessman who'd previously hosted Shark Tank.

READ: UPDATE: PLANE SUPPOSEDLY WITH SHOHEI OHTANI ON IT ACTUALLY CARRIED SHARK TANK STAR

Another report on Friday said he'd made his choice and was signing with the Toronto Blue Jays. But national reporters contradicted it, saying he had yet to make his decision. And then, out of nowhere, Shohei just dropped it on Instagram himself.

Time to celebrate, Dodgers fans.

There's plenty to unpack about what the Ohtani signing means for baseball, for the Dodgers and for him personally, but what's most shocking about the news isn't just that he chose to play in Los Angeles. It's the money.

Heading into free agency, industry expectations were that Ohtani, despite undergoing arm surgery that would prevent him from pitching in 2024, would get north of $500 million. Some even estimated as high as $600 million.

Yeah. They weren't even close. Try $700 million over 10 years.

Now Ohtani can finally afford to live in Southern California.

ANAHEIM, CALIFORNIA - Shohei Ohtani of the Los Angeles Angels in the dugout while playing the Detroit Tigers at Angel Stadium on September 17. (Photo by John McCoy/Getty Images)

Shohei Ohtani Signs Record Breaking Deal With The Dodgers

Passan also posted that Ohtani's deal has "significant deferrals" that were his idea. According to his report, those deferrals will lower the luxury tax hit that the Dodgers will face during his career in order to help them stay competitive with other free agents.

Ohtani taking deferrals is, for someone who's now guaranteed $700 million, an incredibly selfless move. Considering inflation and the time value of money, that salary will be worth considerably less in the decades to come than it is right now. Get out the violin, sure, but it does in fact represent a sacrifice considering he was under no obligation to help the team.

"This is a unique, historic contract for a unique, historic player," Ohtani's agent, Nez Balelo of CAA Sports, said in a statement. "He is excited to begin this partnership, and he structured his contract to reflect a true commitment from both sides to long-term success."

Ohtani now joins Mookie Betts and Freddie Freeman to form one of the most fearsome lineups in the sport. Perhaps even overshadowing new New York Yankees teammates Aaron Judge and Juan Soto. In 2023, Ohtani hit 44 home runs in just 135 games, stole 20 bases, hit .304/.412/.654, a batting line 80% better than league average. Oh, and he had a 3.14 ERA with one of the highest strikeout rates in baseball.

There's plenty of analysis and detail left to be discussed and uncovered, and Ohtani's press conference will be must-see-TV.

But for now, one of the best, if not the absolute best players in the history of baseball is now officially a Los Angeles Dodger. And all it cost was a measly $700 million.