Long Island Official Drops NSFW Line While Hyping Up America's 250th Birthday Celebration

I don't know about you, but I'm pretty fired up about the United States of America's 250th birthday, or semiquincentennial, as it's known.

I wasn't born for the bicentennial, and I'll be 80 years old if I'm lucky enough to make it to the tricentennial in 2076. Ergo, the semiquincentennial next Independence Day is going to be my time to shine, and I'm not passing it up.

However, I'm nowhere near as excited as one Long Island local leader who is so fired up about America blowing out 250 candles that he's using terms that definitely don't mean what he thinks they mean to describe what his county has in store for the big day.

Suffolk County, Long Island executive Ed Romaine was announcing what the county has in store to ring in 250 years of the good ol' US of A, and unless he misspoke, this celebration would make the Founding Fathers blush.

"It's going to be a gang bang like you have never seen," Romaine said.

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…

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Say what?

I mean, I'm excited about America's 250th, too, but Ed is on another level. 

"We're going to send off the rockets," Romaine continued as those behind him laughed, and one guy behind him in a powdered wig and a tri-corner hat wrinkled up his nose like he was standing over an open sewer line. "We're going to enjoy our independence. Thank you!"

Alright, so either Ed misspoke or he has been going around using the term "gang bang" for anything that's going to be a good time.

A backyard cookout? That's a gang bang by Ed's standards.

A birthday party at a roller rink? Total gang bang.

Drinking beers and watching football with the fellas? You better believe that's gang bang… again, by the standards put forth by Romaine's apparent misunderstanding of the term.

I'd advise not using that term anymore (don't google it to find out why; at least not on a computer that belongs to the county).

Let's just say, if you're looking for a good time next July 4, it sounds like Suffolk County is the place to be.