Lexi Thompson Leaves Golf Fans Hyperventilating With Christmas Week Bikini Content, Philip Rivers Memes & MEAT
Plus: A Screencaps reader makes a plea for mature Millennials or Gen Zs to date his daughter.
The power of Screencaps during the Christmas shopping season
— Cody M. shares:
I had Christmas with the in-laws this past weekend just south of Indianapolis and it was a good one. It was my first Christmas since becoming a dad. The first gift I opened was a Battery Daddy along with a set of batteries to fill it. The next one was a ¼ zip and the wife said she really likes how those look. I know they don't follow Screencaps so I couldn't believe those two gifts.
As for the kids gifts, one of the kids got a Nex Playground. We hooked it up, and it's basically a Wii without the remote. We had a lot of fun with it. Highly recommend for younger kids as it keeps kids active. I believe I heard that you need to purchase a subscription with it, so that part is unfortunate. No other gifts really stood out, the basic toys/Pokémon cards. Thought I would share what I'm seeing out there.
Merry Christmas everyone!
Kinsey:
Ladies, we don't want much, but this present combo will do just fine. Mrs. Screencaps spoke up recently to tell me that she didn't get me much.
Please, say no more.
I'm officially to the I don't want more clutter, please don't buy me things that clutter the house stage of life.
There's this running joke on my mom's side of the family where, years ago, my grandfather brought Christmas gifts for the grandchildren to one specific Christmas gathering. It was a few years after my grandmother had passed. My grandfather wasn't exactly up on what gifts to buy, but there were gifts, which was a nice touch. My cousin, or my brother, (my brain is foggy at this point) opens a gift, and it's a pack of batteries.
What? A pack of batteries? Hey grandpa, what the hell is up with this gift? Make it make sense, old man.
I think he just laughed. No, it wasn't Alzheimers or dementia kicking in.
All these years later, as I'm getting older, I'm starting to think it was just a sign that he'd reached that stage in life where he just wanted to open a pack of batteries on Christmas, and he figured his grandchildren would appreciate the thought. Batteries! You can use them…for remotes…for your Walkmans, he must've thought.
Looking back, grandpa was probably telling us that he was in his downsizing stage, minus the massive Chevy conversion van and his new money-grubbing girlfriend's jewelry-buying habit that left him penniless, minus his Dayton Power and Light pension when he died.
Here I am at a similar stage with the downsizing. No, I haven't given up on aspiring for nice stuff. I will gladly let Mrs. Screencaps buy me Kirkland golf balls (they do scuff too easily) and martini tees.
And batteries. Let's keep it simple.
A message for ‘The Canoe Jerk’ and the ¼ zip drama he created during, supposedly, the happiest time of the year
— Monty wrote all of this on his iPhone:
Hey Joe!! You’re old buddy "Montgomery Lee in Tennessee". I’m a looooong time, religious follower of Screencaps (I got a TNML sticker on my GAS mower) and the greatest website in the history of mankind, OUTKICK! Okey dokey, let’s light this candle for "Canoe Jerk". I may be wrong but in reading the, oh I don’t know, 1000 references to your pal "Canoe Kirk" that he is from Pinckney, Mi?
If so, this is my double whammy for "Kirky" if he is indeed from Pinckney. The 1/4 zip I’m sporting is vintage MONTROSE RAMS from approximately the year 2000. Within a year or two, this was what I was wearing when I climbed on a school bus with 16 JV football players to take a little trip down US 23 to take on Pinckney. For reference, Montrose is a school of about 300 kids (hence the 20 person traveling party).
Pinckney is/was a school with about 3 or 4 times the size. When we got off the bus the good folks at Pinckney pointed and laughed at this little school that dared come to play them. Let me cut to the chase. By the time the evening was over we walked the dog on those elitists to the tune of 66-6. When they scored their "6" it was with about 2 minutes left and let me tell ya, I was good and pissed that they scored at all. In fact I was so pissed that I had my team run about 10 sideline gassers on THEIR field AFTER the game was over before we departed home.
Kinda hoping that perhaps "Canoe Kirky" had a kid on the team? Or maybe he was one of those classic "jock sniffers" that ran the chains cause he scored 3 TD’s one game back in the 1980’s. Perhaps you’ve heard of the work that Tony Annesse is doing up at Ferris State. Ferris just won their 4th NATIONAL TITLE in 5 years in DII. Well Tony coached at Montrose before he went on to bigger and better.
Guess what little Montgomery Lee was running against the "canoeists" at Pinckney?
Yup, split back veer. Learned from the best football coach in the country. And in case you’re wondering if I’m engaging in hyperbole, ask REAL football people whose better. You’ll get crickets. I literally called ONE play the whole game. I told my QB, if they are in an odd front, run outside veer. If they’re in an even front, run midline. He called the whole game from the line. I literally sat in a lawn chair coaching the game. Somewhere in the middle of the 3rd quarter I ran in a "42 trap" cause I wanted something to do. It got BLOWN UP for a 3 yd loss. So back to the lawn chair.
Ok, in closing, the reason I sent this is twofold. Even though you’re a "Suckeye" 🤮 I start each and every day with you and I can’t wait for each and EVERY article from the whole gang (Zach Dean is my spirit animal. I to played small college baseball (DII. Go Cards from Saginaw Valley State University) AND, I will not stand for "1/4 zip" hatred.
Down yonder here in Tennessee (after fleeing LIB Michigan) the 1/4 zip is the "Tennessee Tuxedo" for when it’s too cold for a sweatshirt and much more fashionable than an Eskimo Parka when you want to head to the Radisson in "Fargo, Mi" for the lunch buffet. I’m "Team Joe" on pretty much ALL issues. And if "Rowboat Kirky" has a problem, I’ll buy him a beer and we can trade "noogies" like big boys do. Merry Christmas to the Kinsey’s and everyone. God bless us, one and all! 🎄
Kinsey:
I hate to break this to Monty because he was absolutely rolling in this email, but Canoe Kirk isn't in Pinckney. Defense contractor show attendee Brandon C. is in Pinckney.
Canoe Kirk is in SE MI on a dirt road because the locals refuse to pay taxes for paved roads.
That said, I wholeheartedly appreciate this passionate email from Monty. The shit-talking was impressive. I want more of that out of you, Monty. Now we await Kirky's response.
— Karl T. opines on Michigan roads:
Replying to your comment
"Canoe Kirk lives on a gravel road because in Michigan, many residents would rather have a gravel road than pay taxes for a paved road."
Unfortunately, the gravel roads are smoother in Michigan than most of the paved! Fix the Damn roads Gretchen!
Kinsey:
I keep a 20-year-old car to drive specifically to Canoe Kirk's house. I refuse to drive our good cars down his road. No chance.
Dads vow to buy even more ¼ zips as ¼ zip drama EXPLODES
— Duncan refuses to stop buying clothes he loves:
As a former golf pro, I've been wearing quarter zips for 30 years. They are the best! I even bought my 13 year old son his first 1/4 zip for Christmas!
No pics yet, but for Christmas dinner I cook filets on the grill and my wife makes homemade french fries, which are better than ant restaurant can make Merry Christmas to the screencaps family!
— Jake in Oregon yanked his out of the closet as an f-you to Canoe Kirk:
Too few or just right???
Screencaps dad wants to know if there are any good guys out there for his daughter?
— X-Canuck writes:
Some good reads lately as usual. You asked for material for your upcoming Christmas column, here are mine, use what you will as it's a bit lengthy.
First, leaving the cold of Canada (where I was wearing ski-doo suits and toques all the time), for the warmth of Arizona, quarter zips are PERFECT when the temp drops here in winter. I must have about a dozen quarter zips for any and all occasions! I have a casual one with my beloved Edmonton Oilers logo on the front and emblazoned on the back. Great for lounging about the house, doing chores outside. I have few upscale ones from the Ralph Lauren outlet store that are great for going out to dinner, or out with friends. The Mrs. has me in all kinds of colors as she strides proudly beside me. The perfect garment for its versatility and ease of use. Sweatshirts are way too casual and belong on a college campus, while windbreakers and golf jackets are way too formal and make one look stiff and snobby.
Speaking of the young men these days, I just shake my head. When I graduated from high school in 1981, I remember wanting to get out there, work hard and make something of myself. I was gonna make $100k a year. Today, young men might graduate from high school and have absolutely no drive, no goals. No common sense either, and like my Pastor says "common sense isn't so common!" My daughter is 27, a flight attendant, good-looking and her complaint is guys are just so immature, have nothing going for them, reliant on their mom and dad! If you know of any mature young men making their way in life, send em my way!
I applaud you for driving you & Mrs. Screencaps up to the mall and caring for her during her back spasms . . . Happy wife, happy life. But if you want a real mall, get her on a plane up to my hometown of Edmonton, Alberta and take her to the biggest mall in North America, West Edmonton Mall. There, you will find everything and anything over the 3 days you will need to get through all 3 phases of that beast.
Some quips for your readers:
- If you're not early, your late!
- For you middle-aged men with a spare tire, my grandma always said "if you got something good, build a shed over it"
- If you are looking for a relationship, have hope, grandma always said, "There is a lid for every pot!"
Attached are a couple of pics, one of me in a couple of quarter zips and my daughter.
Casual quarter zip with the Mrs.
My daughter:
Kinsey:
This is a first. I've connected readers who have formed Screencaps groups in places like Johnson City, TN and the Phoenix area, but I've never had a dad reach the point where he's telling the single, mature, good guys to steal his daughter's heart.
When this column was founded around 13-14 years ago, I didn't envision it getting to this point, but here we are and now I cannot help but think about creating our own version of the Bachelorette.
Is there a Gen Z or mature Millennial out there who cannot seem to win in the dating game? X-Canuck's daughter feels the same way. Maybe there's some sort of connection to be made here.
Email: joe.kinsey@outkick.com or use my Gmail and I will connect you young bachelors with X-Canuck.
Remember when Riverfront Stadium looked like Busch Stadium, which looked like Three Rivers Stadium, which looked like Veterans Stadium which looked like Fulton County Stadium?
No, I didn't have to look up those stadium names. They're burned into my brain. I cannot remember where I put my car fobs, but I can rattle off the names of the multipurpose stadiums of the 1980s.
On Monday, the Chiefs announced they're building a dome that looks exactly like Vegas, which looks exactly like Minnesota, which looks exactly like the dome Chicago is supposedly going to build, which looks pretty much like the dome that Tennessee is building.
The real winners in this whole stadium boom has to be the architects who drop in a photo of U.S. Bank Stadium into an AI generator to come up with a new stadium design. In less than five minutes, these guys have a photo to show Chiefs ownership, and before you know it, the taxpayers of Kansas are on the hook for like a billion or more.
On Lee Trevino providing us sports highlights in 2025
— Brent P. in Indiana checks in:
I just wanted to say thank you to you and Outkick for the best damn daily column on the internet. It has been a great year. My peach for the year is my son getting married and my daughter winning the Indiana state championship in pole vault. My pit for the year is the passing of a dear friend and great umpire.
A perfect example of why this column is great, is the Lee Trevino interview you posted today. I would have never seen the interview outside of this column. And it is an interview that makes you feel happy, and grateful, and nostalgic all at once.
— Dan in Lawrenceburg, KY makes a great point about Lee Trevino ever stepping foot back at Augusta National:
I agree that Lee Trevino would make a good starter at the Master's but I wouldn't bet on it. For one, he never won the Masters, which is probably their number one criteria. Plus, Trevino had a very frosty relationship with Augusta National (https://www.golfcompendium.com/2019/08/lee-trevino-at-masters-pray-they-dont.html) and since those guys wearing the green jackets have long memories, it's doubtful they would ask him to do that.
Kinsey:
I wasn't aware of how much disdain Trevino has for The Masters. He's never serving as a guest honorary starter. We can put that to rest.
Tokyo in December
— JYC emails:
It’s been a minute since I sent in my first email a few months ago about helping someone looking to start their own business an helping with tax and organization suggestions.
It didn’t make Screencaps as I’m sure it was as exciting a read as my last 33 years in accounting have been.
I do wonder how it’s worked out for him since.
As I said last time I was born in Columbus but live in Hawaii.
I’m writing right now from Tokyo. It’s Tuesday morning and it’s like I’ve gone through a wormhole. We left Hawaii Sunday afternoon, landed in Tokyo and it was Monday night, went to bed and woke up and now it’s Tuesday morning.
As a religious Screencaps reader first thing I did was open Outkick.
The best thing about living in Hawaii is that Screencaps is up and posted by the time I get to my desk at 6:30 well except for a Saturday a few weeks ago when I couldn’t find it!!
LOL just a little ball busting ¼ zip style.
Imagine my surprise not only was Screencaps up, so was Nightcaps.
I read your plea for content so I’m hopefully going to do my best Mike T impression from the other side of the globe to entertain my fellow Screencaps readers. It’s our first morning here so the pickings are sparse. I attached a photo of the Tokyo sunrise for Todd Z as well as the Tokyo Tower.
The file sizes are pretty large so I’ll send another email with some photos of the minibar. We’re off to Tsukiji Fish market so hopefully I’ll get some photos that rival Mike T’s meat markets.
Merry Christmas to you , the family and the rest of Screencaps Nation.
JYC also photos of the minibar to get your brain thinking about what you're willing to pay in Tokyo to pour a drink in your room:
Kinsey:
Is 20,000 yen expensive for the Brut? My Google yen to dollar converter says that's $128. How much is Brut if you go downstairs to the local liquor store?
The power of Dukes of Hazzard all these years later
— TV in Bham checks in:
You’re tugging on my heartstrings with the framed Daisy Dukes. Growing up as a kid in the 80’s that was my absolute favorite show. At the time, I was a little young for Daisy so the attraction for me was the General Lee. So much so, when the World of Wheels came to Birmingham I was so excited because that miraculous Dodge Charger was going to be there!
However, when I saw it in person, the doors were open…blasphemy! In my young eyes, it was a total fake because Bo and Luke’s had the doors welded shut on theirs and could only climb in through the windows. I didn’t even want my picture taken with it! I did get a picture with Kitt from Knight Rider, though.
Anyway, here’s one of my prized possessions. My kids (11 & 9 year olds) still eat meals off of it.
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I feel like that is more than enough for you to read this morning while you're on the couch scrolling on your iPad.
Enjoy the football. Enjoy the golf if you're in AZ like X-Canuck. Enjoy retirement. Don't go doom scrolling on Facebook. Turn off the devices and go live life. Go for a walk.
Let's have a great day.
📩 Email: joe.kinsey@outkick.com
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