Hooters Josie Is Ready To Be A Star, Taylor Swift-Travis Kelce Memes & Tempers Flare At Martinsville Between Pit Crews
You better believe I'm walking around the house this morning with my chest puffed out more than normal after a major life accomplishment
It finally happened -- I broke 90 on a legitimate 100-year-old golf course while using full golf integrity ... no breakfast balls, no mulligans, no 'hit it again(s),' no 'I was talking in your backswing,' no foot wedges, no 'just call it a double' behavior.
I shot an 88 Sunday morning.
Of course, I can hear the golf pros reading today's column thinking, "Good job, loser. What took so long?"
Here's where I have to push back a little bit because I estimate that 90% of golfers aren't playing full-integrity golf. I'm not pulling that number out of thin air. We already know just 26% of golfers are breaking 90 on a regular basis and you have to believe at least 10% of those are cheaters taking breakfast balls and using foot wedges out of the trees.
I'm not giving MetaQuest VR Golf the full credit for my success -- I haven't been drinking while golfing and the scores are dropping...imagine that -- but I'll just say that my two best putting rounds of golf came after I started playing Golf+ on VR.
Seriously.
#notsponsored
Observations from a long weekend of football
Let's roll through these:
Respect Summer is over, Gerard
This email was sent to me at 12:45 ET Sunday morning.
• Gerard W. writes:
We respected summer by heading to an outdoor beer garden to listen to a great 90s cover band. The weather and sky were beautiful. (See attached). Did you respect summer by watching the OSU game outside?
We were not that far from where the Illinois State police made their biggest drug bust ever. Look at all that dope these guys were hauling on that bus! (See attached) Well guess what our great state did? They immediately released the guys driving the bus! We have that new cashless bail law. You can't make this shit up. We have to have the dumbest governor in all of the USA.
Kinsey:
Reminder: The autumnal equinox was at like 2:45 a.m. SATURDAY MORNING. That said, yes, I watched 75% of the Ohio State game outside on a neighbor's patio before making it home in time to hunker down for The Drive®.
By the way, look what happened after the record-setting drug bust
A report from Munich
• Brent P. in Indiana writes:
Just spent two days in Munich to experience the Oktoberfest festival. An indescribable experience. You must see for yourself. We did sing a lot of John Denver’s “country road”, Bruce Channel’s “hey baby”, and Queen’s “rock you”. Two days were enough for us. Now on to lake Como Italy. Screencaps is keeping me sane as we travel.
Also. I forgot Neil Diamond’s “sweet Caroline” was sung the most after “hey baby”
Germans and "Country Roads"
• Lee D. writes:
Joe, thought you may have heard/seen how the Müncheners broke out into John Denver when the Bucs played the Seahawks over there last November. There are a bunch of video clips on Twitter (including mine) of how the crowd in unison started singing "Country Roads" at the two-minute warning. And they didn't stop until the game was nearly over.
Sara Walsh of NFL Network has video (on her Twitter feed) from the sidelines of Bucs players staring up into the crowd with big smiles on their faces watching/listening to the fans all sing that song as the game was going on.
Was told by the locals there "Country Roads" is a popular bar song (the Germans love to sing while they drink) often played near closing time. (Sort of like that maudlin, cheesy "Closing Time" song by Semisonic.)
So yeah, "Country Roads" is way popular drinking song there. Saw it with my own eyes (and ears).
And yeah, at least in Munich, I was very surprised how bilingual the locals are. I'm serious I've had more problems conversing in Miami than I did in Munich. I'm serious. Once had a cabbie (remember those things?) in Miami chew me out because I didn't know Spanish -- in America!
Screencaps readers who surf
• John H. writes:
Well here's your email from a reader telling you they surf. Respecting summer means keeping the wetsuit in the closet a bit longer but taking advantage of the thinned out crowds and hurricane swells. Warm water and waves - it's the magic time of the year on the east coast.
Woah, wait just a minute...don't teach the AI bots this!
• Aaron H. writes:
That's it this morning. Fall is here. Now football, Crockpots and decorating gets serious. Let's get after it starting right now. Go have an incredible day of work, get something on the grill and get hunkered down for a Monday Night Football doubleheader.
Take care.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com