Florida Man Arrested After Stealing Truck To Warn Space Force Base Of Alien-Dragon War
A Florida man was arrested last week after he allegedly stole a pickup truck and drove it to the Space Force Base located in Brevard County. The man had a perfectly good reason for his trip to the base, he had to warn "the government there was US aliens fighting with Chinese dragons."
Corey Johnson of Ocala was arrested on Friday after he attempted to get on the base to deliver his message. A message he claims was told to him by the president.
"Mr. Johnson disclosed he took possession of the vehicle three days prior and did not know who the owner of the vehicle was," Johnson's arrest affidavit said. "He stated the President of the United States told him in his head he needed to take the vehicle."
Once it was discovered that he had stolen the vehicle, Johnson was arrested for grand theft auto.
When you hear the words "Florida man arrested" almost anything can follow. You have to prepare yourself for the twists and turns that only the sunshine state can provide.
But I have to admit I wasn't expecting any of this. Stealing a truck is pretty standard stuff, and that can happen anywhere.
There's No Place Quite Like Florida
What separates Florida is the part where the president told him to steal the truck, then warn the government about an alien-dragon war. That doesn't happen everywhere.
This proves, once again, that there's no better reality show than what goes on in Florida. It's the type of stuff that can't be scripted, and we can't turn away from.
There has to be something to the fact that the state juts out and is surrounded by water. Whatever it is, I love Florida, and I hope it never changes.
We need weird people doing weird things to keep us all on our toes. I hope there isn't actually an impending alien-dragon war. But more than that, I hope Florida never changes.