Elizabeth Hurley's Christmas Costume, Cowboys Fan Gets Punched & Mac Jones In His PJs

You're damn right it feels great to lead the AFC North heading into January, but....

...as I've written many time in this space, I'm a wounded Bengals fan who has been mentally devastated so many times in the past that I have trained my mind and body to not get too emotionally high or low. Take Sunday, for example. I knew the Bengals had a massive game against the Ravens, but I had to take my mind off of things, so I turned Sunday morning into new smoke detectors, carbon monoxide detectors, and hallway light installation day.

My mind was thinking about the safety of my family instead of the safety of the Bengals playoff chances. I knew my dad would call if there was something I needed to know. Then, at 2 ET, he called with the news that the Bungles were up 24-7 and looking real good. Eventually, I sat/stood nervously in the basement as Cincinnati jumped into first place with a blowout win.

Safety from a house fire: check

Bengals have a division lead and the tiebreaker: check

Bengals get the Chiefs at home with the Chiefs wanting that incredibly important home-field advantage: check

Bengals need to win one of their final two games to win the division: check

Final game of the season is in Cleveland and tickets are about $50: check

Now I need to find more home projects to keep me occupied through the first half of next week's game as Tony Romo and Jim Nantz lust over Patrick Mahomes. It might be a good time to clean out the laundry room.

Stay calm, there's no way the Steelers win the division...I just have to keep telling myself that.

• Speaking of the new front entrance hallway light, it's one of these new LED lights that is so bright it makes you wonder how you lived in such darkness before turning on this bad boy. It also alerts you to how badly you need to paint the front entrance hallway due to the kids beating on it with toys and their hands.

• Heads up, January 2 is the perfect day to take down the Christmas tree and outside lights. If your wife is like mine, she wants the lights up through New Years. That means next Sunday is very important to us men. We need to get 2022 off to a quick start and get this stuff down before it drags on for weeks as you get back to work and put it off into February when it's going to snow like crazy. Circle your calendars, fellas. Next Sunday...it's ON.

• Chad R. writes:

I hope you are doing well.  I was just curious if you will check out the new USFL football league when it debuts in April?  Thanks for your time.

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Well, Chad, I've seen so many promos for the USFL that now I'm curious what will differentiate it from the XFL and the Alliance, or whatever that league was called. That means I'll give it a weekend. And it'll have to be at night. From January 1 to May 15, the race is on to get all the small projects done so I can then transition into Yacht Rock on the patio mode. This week, I plan on sitting down at the kitchen table to go over my to-do list with my wife.

Many weekends will be used prepping for the Grand Daddy of Them All garage sale. I'm talking clearing a whole bunch of stuff out of the kids' rooms and a bunch of promo stuff sent to me by brands over the years. I'm starting to feel like a guy prepping for retirement -- I'm in a liquidation mode for certain items.

How will the USFL fit into that schedule? TBD.

• Raymond B. writes:

https://www.wsj.com/articles/colin-kaepernick-spac-deal-collapses-testing-celebrity-halo-11640373559

I'm not sure if you saw this but it looks Kaep is having more problems. I saw he has a commercial for a rowing machine that ran on the NFL Network last week. This may be part of the reason Michelle Tafoya is not on the sidelines still.  

Happy new year from where lawn mowing season never really ends: Georgia 

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I haven't been keeping up with Kaep because I have things like new smoke detectors to install, but I did hear Michelle working the sidelines last night in Dallas.

• Beau in Toledo checks in:

Hey Joe! Hope the Kinsey Christmas was good! Spotted this at the DaddyPop Store today and thought ScreenCap Nation would enjoy.

• Indy Daryl has a few items to check off his list this morning:

Merry Christmas!

Mundane life is what most people do every day. It isn’t flashy. It isn’t spectacular to the outside world. But ya know what… it is perfectly wonderful to the rest of us. We want to love our family’s well. We want to provide a good life for our kids. We want to teach them that anything is possible if you work hard. And if you love something, that’s good enough. We don’t have to end every disease or problem of the world. We just need to be present for our wives, our children, our neighbors, and anyone else whom we call friend. Offering whatever help they might need.

It has been a wonderful year hearing about how people are doing across the nation, despite what any new source might say. We are out here trying to help whomever we can. And you have sought out those voices and I have loved every minute of it.

Keep up the great work and I can’t wait for what 2022 will bring!

(One of my favorite gifts this year:)

• Ryan W. writes:

I hope you’ve had a merry Christmas. Thanks for keeping me entertained in 2021 and really looking forward to the 320 days of screencaps in 2022! Here’s an end-of-year smoked prime rib for your viewing pleasure!!

Don’t mind that corkscrew it’s was not used #actuallyitwasusedheavily

• I know you guys want a full report on Christmas at the Kinsey house. It was very nice and calm. I do need to give a special shoutout to my aunt in New Mexico who sent a gift that is perfect -- she paid for us to do a Kinsey Family Putt-Putt Invitational at a course in Michigan that we haven't played yet. And she added on some concession stand money for snacks and ice cream, which means we will have a full-on adventure at some point in 2022.

The Kinsey boys were happy with what Santa delivered and I noticed how little cardboard I had to break down, so it was a great year.

• Let's have a strong final week around here. Some of you have asked for 'Best of' content and lists, so I'll make sure to get on that. Enjoy the college football games that remain and the time off.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

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Written by
Joe Kinsey is the Senior Director of Content of OutKick and the editor of the Morning Screencaps column that examines a variety of stories taking place in real America. Kinsey is also the founder of OutKick’s Thursday Night Mowing League, America’s largest virtual mowing league. Kinsey graduated from University of Toledo.