Cobra Kai's Back And Johnny Lawrence Is Still Awesome

Netflix’s Cobra Kai returned for season five on Friday, and in turn, so did Johnny Lawrence. 

And that's awesome.

If you’re not familiar, Lawrence (played by William Zabka) is the two-time All Valley karate champion (1982 and 1983). He’s also the best current character on tv/streaming.

If you like Coors banquet, ‘80s classic rock, and boobs (and who doesn’t?), you’ll find Lawrence as enjoyable as that just-woke-up morning pee.

William Zabka who plays Johnny Lawrence, attends Netflix's "Cobra Kai" Season 5 Premiere at Los Angeles State Historic Park. (Photo by Allen Berezovsky/FilmMagic).

Throughout the hit series’ first four seasons, Lawrence has proved himself to be a Liberal’s worst nightmare. He swears with the consistency of an NFL position coach, hands cocky kids the ass-beating they deserve but never expect, and treats internet search engines the same way 15-year-old boys do when home alone.

When a high school girl attempted to join Lawrence’s dojo in an early season of the series, Lawrence responded: “I appreciate you coming in, but there are no girls in Cobra Kai.” When he was asked why not, Lawrence simply responded: “The same reason there’s not women in the army, it doesn’t make sense.”

Lawrence Is Immune To Cancel Culture

At one point he was being shown used cars to drive and pricelessly told the car dealer (Daniel LaRusso): “A (Subaru) Forester? Do I look like a lesbo?”

I admit, within the first five minutes of seeing Lawrence on screen in Cobra Kai’s first season, I was immediately hooked. 

Maybe it’s because he once told his student to “Change that ringtone, get some Guns ‘N Roses or something.”

Regardless, my admiration’s only grown in the four seasons since. Gone were memories of he and his Skelton-clad friends punishing Daniel LaRusso in a high school bathroom. They’ve been replaced by training montages of Lawrence kicking down residential mailboxes and wearing out a Walkman. 

There’s also the headbands which are so prominently featured in all five seasons of Netflix's Cobra Kai. Think your Supreme shirt is cool? How bout those way-too-tight pants? Or those dumb Crocs? Think again. Headbands are all the damn rage - assuming you kick ass.

Johnny Lawrence Never Disappoints

If you haven’t yet watched Cobra Kai’s first four seasons, well, you’ve got some catching up to do. 

In the meantime, know that Lawrence is just a Netflix and chill away, still kicking ass five years after the series premiered. The show’s fifth season (no spoilers) kicks off with Lawrence continuing to live the American dream. He’s still living his best ‘80s life:  listening to Poison, adhering to a strict convenience store diet, making an air-brushed minivan cool and (presumably) shacking up with the hot girl from the apartment across the hall. 

Oh, and the reason sensei Lawrence practices and teaches karate is to show the world that “you’re not a bunch of pansy-ass nerds.”

Hard to believe someone as awesome as Lawrence resides in Los Angeles.