Carmen Electra's New Boxing Content Has People Thinking It's The 1990s Again, Respect Summer & A Moose Attack
Plus: Do not fall for this PR stunt out of Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift. They're just trying to steal summer.
This is all such calculated bullshit — I'm begging you guys not to fall for it, but you won't because you're reading one of the last columns in America where readers have a set of nuts
I was literally JUST TELLING Mrs. Screencaps my theory about this timing not being coincidental as we were in line last night for Mrs. Screencaps to get a pumpkin whatever drink.
Full disclosure: I did not see this meme before presenting my theory to Mrs. Screencaps.
— Ross G. says:
They heard about Screencaps day…
Kinsey:
THIS is clearly yet another attempt to steal more days from summer, and it's disgusting. These brands, these pop-culture terrorists and their TikTok dork influencers must be defeated with our Screencaps #RespectSummer campaign.
Guys, your wife might want that pumpkin drink. Get it for her. Don't fight the war on that front. Happy wife, happy life and less of a chance you end up in divorce court.
But it's up to you to keep summer going with your kids. Plan those water balloon fights. Plan those fishing trips. Buy slabs of MEAT and tell couples to come over which will force your friends' wives to #RespectSummer as you throw a patio party while the sweet tunes of Yacht Rock are blasting through your patio speakers.
Meanwhile, MEAT smoke will overpower the pumpkin candle your wife lights up. Make sure to place the tray of piping-hot steaks on top of that candle. Mark your territory.
Guys, it's up to us. The Rachel Maddow glasses-wearing terrorists will take all of August if we let them.
Hold the line!
Guys, these are the morons who will steal August away from you if you let them win. These professors who can't even show up to class over this news. These are the weaklings that will have blue spruce candles burning proudly the first week of August if we don't FIGHT for summer.
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From being ready to give up on cross country to running in the Big Ten
— Scot O. tells the story of his daughter's cross country career:
My daughter switched from travel soccer to cross country to purely to avoid the club politics.
The night before her first race in 7th grade I saw her in her room folding up her shorts and singlet and putting it in a box so I asked her what was going on.
She told me that she wasn’t going to run and not stating it but because of me. See as she grew up I instilled in her commitment and unless she was committed, I indicated that success was limited.
So, I had to call an audible asked to her to try it out and give it a shot, see what happens and go from there.
The next day she ran showing number 1 for 7th and 8th grade girls and finishing top 10 overall as boys ran the same race. She loved it and her decision, she went on to run cross county for a BIG10 school all four years as number 3 or 4 on the team. The BIG10 has depth and some powerhouse teams so you are in the thick of it.
What you and your son will like about cross country is that there is no club politics (as previously noted), the only yelling parents are those yelling and screaming for your son and his teammates, there are no referees, judges or umpires making bad calls and most importantly it’s all about the runner against the clock.
Unlike a prior responder, I did run all over the course cheering my daughter and team on until she graduated college. You just need to know that you are going to get wet, cold, scratched up and sweaty. Best of luck to your son.
More cross country messages as Screencaps Jr. prepares for his second run later tonight
— Todd from an undisclosed location in northern Idaho emails:
Not due to the FBI, although that would be bad assed, but due to wanting to preserve what we have (see attached pic from my front room) here from the masses.
Bottle v. Can - the bottle wins every time here. Those that voted stated that "it just tastes better" in the bottle. I'm on the wagon since 2019, so I don't know, but I tend to lean towards your view...it's all the same.
I'd never thought of my privilege "growing up in a town with a Country Club", but you are right! Just knowing those CC kids made me a better man. Ha! I can tell you what it did do. It made me work my ass off so I could afford to belong to The Club, only to realize, after being able to enter, that it wasn't a place I wanted to be! I'm sure there are some very nice CC'ers out there, but it wasn't for me!
As an aside, I was an avid runner and am following closely your Cross Country running stories. The one piece of advice that I was given, that sticks out today, is, "you cannot cheat the miles." The sport requires a high level of both physical and mental discipline and that, in my opinion, is what differentiates XC from other sports. Go Screencaps Jr.!
Kinsey:
Now that's a man who RESPECTS SUMMER. Holy crap, Todd! Talk about coming off the top rope with a patio banger. Yes, folks, those are reflections of the clouds in Todd's photo.
He busted out his phone and told it to take a pic in 8K.
What a great message from T-O-Double-D. He went out, busted his ass to get that country club money and figured out he was more of a lake guy.
At the end of the day it's all about going out and getting yourself a slice in life. Todd has done well and the FBI isn't after him like many other Idaho men.
— Kevin D. has his own cross country message:
One of yesterday’s contributors reminded me of something to instill in your son. 1) finish the race unless you are seriously injured (broken bones count, cramps and other pains from running don’t) 2) don’t start a race you don’t plan to finish (eg, I’m still rehabbing so I’m just going to run the first mile).
Between high school and college there were always a couple guys who would sprint the first mile then once people started catching up drop out bc of ‘shin splints’ or some other BS. 20 years later I have 0 respect for these guys and frankly would have serious questions about their character bc of it. The guys who limp in last across the finish line of every race are 10x the runner compared to a guy who takes the lead and drops out.
Bills fan creates the ultimate 2025 meal schedule based on the team's schedule
— Guy G. in western NY does this every year. Let this be an inspiration to your own NFL season:
It was time to build the Bills Food menu for 2025. As usual, it’ll rotate around the grill as much as possible, but….
She wanted more nachos in our Sunday football viewings. Mrs F wants nachos?! She’s going to get all the nachos!
vs BAL Old Bay Nachos
@NYJ Buffalo pizza/wings
vs NO Gumbo Nachos
vs NE Lobster Shack Nachos
@ ATL Pulled Pork Nachos
@ CAR Pulled Chicken Nachos
vs KC KC Rib Nachos
@ MIA Buffalo pizza/wings
vs TB Baja Nachos
@HOU Shredded Beef Nachos
@PIT Pittsburgh Steak Nachos
vs CIN Chili Nachos
@NE Buffalo pizza/wings
@ CLE Cornes Beef Nachos
vs PHI Philly Cheesesteak Nachos
vs NYJ Supreme Pizza Nachos
YouTubeTV and this weekend
— Kevin in Toboso is worried:
I have been looking forward to this weekend all year and now I get an email from YouTubeTV that due to a dispute they might rip out my soul and not broadcast games on Fox this weekend? I live in the hills in God's country and can't get TV any other way. Call your bosses, get Clay on it.
This needs fixed yesterday. I wouldn't care if it was peak dildo throwing season in the WNBA finals but this is football.... TOSU VS tx come on YouTube and Fox we have to do better. America's true pastime is about to begin its glorious run.
You have power of Screencaps nation behind you Joe. Please help for the love of all that's holy!
Kinsey:
Look, these deals typically get done at the last second, YTTV will announce another price increase in June 2026 when you're on vacation and not paying attention & you'll either accept it or move on to another service.
As a YTTV customer, I want this settled.
But, if not, thankfully, my employer, Fox, gave employees a complimentary subscription to Fox One, the new app that has all Fox content.
YTTV will give in. The Fox catalog of channels are too important to YTTV. Now, if CNN wanted to pick a fight, they could easily be sent packing from a cable lineup and YTTV isn't losing subscribers.
Suckin' down a beer in a can vs. a bottle
— Tommy in Texas says:
Howdy do, Captain Screencaps!
LOVE reading this column everyday for years now. Your analytics should tell you that. Lol. There is a special place in heaven just for you, Joe.
Cans vs. Bottles: To me, it is simple. I have NEVER had a skunky can. I have had plenty of skunky bottles mixed into my consumption since an early age. Someone in the beer industry once told me the light hitting the bottles can affect it over time?? Who knows, but my mouth knows the facts----NEVER a skunky can. Preference order is draft, can, bottle. Period.
Keep on keeping on, brother!
— Green Beret Bo in AZ (formerly in Michigan; he recently moved to the SW) writes in:
There’s only one beer I’ve found that was better in bottles and that is Coors Banquet in the stubbies. Might be psychological, but those things disappear way faster than cans.
— Homebrew Bill knows this industry very well:
The beer industry has been trending towards cans for several years now. Cans are easier to store when empty and cheaper to ship as well. Smaller brewers can have canning lines that can be rolled out of the way when not in use as well. The can holders they use for 4pks and 6pks (like the ones they used for Island Hopper) are also reusable and recyclable.
As far as quality of the beer, I haven't noticed any difference between packaging.
— Rory has a quick thought:
Mostly joking because it's kind of a dick move, but bottled beer is for taking to other people's houses. I don't want the weight and clanking in my garbage.
How early should the landscapers be out in the morning?
— Richard M. tells me:
8:00 a.m. should be the earliest. Having moved to Louisiana I am working on my southern culture, but I will not abide the neighbors’ garden company with gas powered leaf blowers at 7:15 a.m. Our daughter works at the local college bar (yes, in New Orleans you only have to be 18 to tend bar) until 2-230 a.m., and having her blasted out of sleep at 7:15 is unreasonable.
How you knew someone was ‘rich’ growing up
— Jeff Z. emails:
I went to school at a private Catholic school in South Dakota and several of my friends were "doctors kids". This was back in the 70s so no cell phones, not even pagers were around yet. This was back when the average family had one phone in the house, usually in the kitchen.
Anyway, in my mind, the way to tell if someone was rich was if they had a private "kids phone line". This was a separate number for the kids to use so that the main phone line was kept free so that their doctor dad could receive emergency calls from the hospital.
And once we hit high school, these kids usually got their own car while the rest of us had to borrow the family car.
— Mark in Arkansas joins in:
I am at the tail end of the Boomer generation (62) love all the content. The way I knew a family was rich back in my High School days was if they had a microwave oven!
Those monsters back then were probably $2K when now a days you can grab one for $49.00.
As far as beer goes bottle vs can it really doesn't matter to me UNLESS it is an aluminum bottle. Aluminum bottles are just nasty! Give me a regular can and I'm most happy, especially on trash day because the bags aren't nearly as heavy!
— Gen X Warren in Florida checks in:
I also wanted to add to the "rich growing up while a Gen Xer": I grew up in a town in South Florida that seemed to get wealthier by the year. Polo was the elite sport, and kids drove brand new Mercedes and BMWs to high school, despite it not being private. Maybe because the truly elite private schools were big big money.
Outside of those cars, I’d echo what everyone else has said: high-end toys (Castle Greyskull, Omega Supreme, etc.), country club membership, Disney Channel or just cable in general, swimming pool (common in Florida), nice boat, etc. We did all right, as my Dad pointed out, but not rich. We had a private pool membership in the summer, but it wasn’t super expensive. The sister club was the elite CC out west. We had Disney Channel and cable, and my dad did drive a high-end van, but my sister and I shared a cheeseball Ford Escort that got great gas mileage, but you wanted to wear a paper bag over your head while driving it.
Respecting summer: I swear Pottery Barn sent emails in JUNE previewing their Halloween stuff (didn’t hit stores), while one of the candle places advertised Summerween in July. SMH. Looks like that cold front is hitting Florida, upper 60s in north and maybe central Florida, and high of literally 80 in South Florida. That’s nice weather for August!
####################
That is it for this freezing cold Wednesday morning. We might've set a new all-time low last night. The only benefit to this weather is that I slept like a rock and had some vivid, wild dreams going on.
Thanks, Mother Nature.
But it's STILL SUMMER and we need to remember that today. Get out there, golf, work your ass off and finish strong into the Labor Day weekend when you can sit back on the patio and suck down all that the first football weekend has to offer.
Let's go get after it.
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