BBQ Hall Of Famer, Comedy Writer John Markus Has Tips To Keep You From Ruining Your Memorial Day Meal

Memorial Day weekend is upon us, which means we’ve officially hit the unofficial start of summer, so grills and BBQ pits around the nation will be dusted off and fired up for their maiden cooks of 2025.

I recently moved out of an apartment and into a house (*pauses for applause*), which means that I finally have the space to grill and BBQ, and so I’ve thrown myself into smoking and grilling meals for my fiancée and myself as well as any family members who weasel their way into an invite.

I’m still pretty green when it comes to BBQ, and while there are plenty of resources online to learn the basics, I decided it would be a good idea to get some insight from a BBQ Hall of Famer who just so happens to be an Emmy-winning comedy writer, John Markus.

Markus wrote an episode of Taxi in its final season, which led to him working as show runner on The Cosby Show, and he served as a consulting producer and wrote a couple of episodes of The Larry Sanders Show, including the Emmy-nominated episode "Ellen, Or Isn’t She?" 

These days, Markus is writing plays and barbecuing, the latter of which he fused with his background in TV to create the long-running reality series BBQ Pitmasters as well as a documentary called The Kings of BBQ Barbeque Kuwait, in which he and cast members from BBQ Pitmasters traveled to Kuwait to cook on military bases.

But if you’re wondering how a massively successful comedy writer from Ohio gets into BBQ and becomes one of the leading authorities on it, Markus told me that it started with cooking classes that he thought would help him meet women ("Turns out they were all married," Markus told me. "Oh, but they had friends.") and lighting up some Bananas Foster at parties.

BBQ Hall of Famer and Emmy-winning comedy writer John Markus has some advice for those of you heading out to barbecue this Memorial Day. (Getty Images)

However, the lightbulb moment came when he ate a bad batch of ribs made by a fellow comedy writing legend, who also happens to be a former US senator, Al Franken.

The two became friends when the Cosby Show staff would use the Saturday Night Live offices over the summer.

"We were in these offices and Phil Hartman would walk past us during the day," Markus recalled. "And you know, occasionally you'd see Dana Carvey, and here we were working on our show, and Al Franken used to always stop at our table and pitch episodes of The Cosby Show; none of them usable."

The two eventually teamed up and created the critically acclaimed series Lateline together, and while working on it, Franken decided to break-in a never-before-used Weber Kettle that Markus had at his house in Upstate New York.

"[Franken] sees this brand-new Weber kettle grill, and he says, ‘That thing has no dirt on it,’" Markus said. "And I said, ‘Well, I don't really know how to grill or use it, so I'm not doing that.’ He says, ‘Well, you know what? I happen to be a Grill Meister and I make the best ribs in New England.’ Now, something about that, ‘I make the best ribs (in New England),’ and I thought, like, well, that sounds like it's like, 'I'm the best Jewish player in the NBA.'"

So, the two got some spare ribs and marinated them overnight in Hefty bags full of "gallons of soy sauce with two-pound bags of sugar and 10 heads of garlic."

Yum.

"And the next day, we did our writing, and then he said, ‘Get the grill as hot as possible.’ So I piled on — this is me not knowing anything about cooking outdoors — piled on the charcoal in a big mound, sprayed it down with lighter fluid, because that's what you do when you don't know what you're doing — Sorry, some of those who use it — and Al cooked them," Markus said.

The results were less than stellar, to say the least, but it got Markus thinking about BBQ.

"Why is this a beloved cuisine? What is it, and how do you keep from making it terrible?" Markus recalled wondering. And I started doing some research. And all research in 1998 led to, I mean, the Internet was young then, but I was on it, and led to Paul Kirk in Kansas City."

Markus jumped into the deep end, flying to Kansas City to Kirk — a renowned, award-winning pitmaster whose book Rubs And Sauces Markus highly recommends to all getting started with outdoor cooking — for a BBQ contest in Lexington, Kansas.

The team for that contest? It was made up of just Kirk and Markus.

Since then, Markus has learned from other pitmasters like Chris Lilly and Aaron Franklin, so, I was curious what he would recommend to those who are new to BBQ, are looking to get started down the road on their own BBQ journey, or just want to steer clear of messing up their Memorial Day cookout.

"Start, humbly," Marukis advised. "Don't, don't go get this prime meat, get something that's affordable and make that good."

He also had some pointers on what sort of equipment and fuel to use as you get started.

"I think it's like, find — as far as equipment — find the vessel that you can best control heat and smoke on, okay? And try to keep it simple," Markus said. "As far as charcoal wood — charcoal wood — wood chips? No. Chunks. Soak them? No. 

"It's like a myth that you need to soak the wood to make it, you know, do what it's supposed to do."

Admit it. A few of you just drained a bowl of wood chips you had sitting out on the counter…

"But you need to put that wood in something, so, as far as what kind of pit to get started on," Markus said simplicity is the key.

"And stick with a kettle grill in the beginning. Stick with the (Weber) Smoky Mountain, a PK grill — which we were talking about earlier — Great tool," Marcus said. "Because if you can learn to barbecue on the straightforward stuff, you can then start thinking about bells and whistles, but don't do bells and whistles early on, because it distracts you. The real knowledge comes from the basics; learning how to use what you've got."

So, if this has you licking your chops and ready to light up a charcoal chimney, fill up the pellet hopper, or start throwing splits in your stick-burner, I asked Markus for the advice he’d give to those manning the grills and pits this Memorial Day.

"Get all your stuff ready, get your smoker all loaded up, and then get out there early," he said. "Make sure that you're done with your recipe, and the meats are finished and resting for three hours before people come, so you buy yourself a lot of time. And I'd start with spare ribs or baby backs, if that's the crowd, if they want to have that. And I'd go with a real simple "1-2-3 method" of rubbing, cooking lower rather than hotter, is always good because it requires more patience, and it takes the time that's going to really make it more foolproof, and then wrapping for another hour and a half, hour (and) forty-five minutes, and then taking out and then letting it rest for a while, and then glazing it the last half hour. So five hours for baby, backs, six hours for spares. 

"And then there is this one cut of beef that is kind of foolproof. And the butcher refers to it as a "123 A." It's whole plate short ribs. The "dinosaur bone" ribs. If you can get a butcher to get you those — and it should be three bones to a slab — that's about seven hours or so (of cooking), I think that's a good way to go."

If that doesn’t make you want to start rubbing salt, pepper, and various other spices and seasonings on cuts of meat, I have no clue what will.

But before you start getting your Memorial Day BBQ feast planned and prepped, Markus was kind enough to offer some great advice for those looking to continue learning about the craft of cooking BBQ:

"Whenever I hear someone talking like they know stuff, I often sort of take everything with a grain of salt, because there are so many ways to do things really well."